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This is the Saints Row Wiki Dialogue portal, which lists all uses of {{dialogue}}.

Portal:Quotes and Portal:Audio are now on separate pages due to length.

See also: To-do/Quote

UI N-A
Random Dialogue
The Protagonist - Female 1: "You cool, Kinzie?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Is it going well?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "You alright, Kinzie?"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "How's it going in there?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Almost done in there?"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "How's it going in there?"
The Protagonist - Zombie: "Sneers"
Kinzie: "These things take time."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "I can do it!"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "I'm doing good, thanks for asking."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Make them take less time."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "You should just let me shoot it instead."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Easier to just shoot these things."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Shoulda let me handle it..."
The Protagonist - Zombie: "Roars"
— "Uplink Convo 1" (from Stop all the Downloading)
Cellphone ring in Saints Row
Article Dialogue
...To Kingdom Come
Aisha: "God, you haven't changed at all, have you?"
Johnny Gat: "Not all of us have a couple million dollars to make changes."
Aisha: "It's always the same shit with you."
Johnny Gat: "Oh, here we go again."
Aisha: "What did you want me to do? Did you expect me not to take my shot?"
Johnny Gat: "No, I expected you to remember where you came from."
Aisha: "Oh, fuck you Johnny."
Johnny Gat: "Fuck me? Fuck you! You're the one who ran off to be famous. The only time you remember who we are is when you want something."
Aisha: "My sister was kidnapped!"
Johnny Gat: "And I brought her back didn't I?"
Aisha: "No, he did."
Johnny Gat: "Bullshit, I told him to do it. No offense."
Aisha: "Look, if you're gonna help me, help me, but don't you dare try to hold it over me."
Johnny Gat: "Fine."
Aisha: "Fine."
Johnny Gat: "Fine."
Johnny Gat: "Relax man; I'd like you to meet Saint's Row's claim to fame. This... is Aisha. And tonight we're gonna kill her."
Aisha: "He's being melodramatic. See, I'm signed with Kingdom Come Records."
Johnny Gat: "And it's no secret that the label is owned by the Vice Kings."
Aisha: "But the real deal is that once you're in you can't get out. They rip you off left and right, and they extort you to stay signed. I've talked to Johnny and he said that you might be willing to help me."
Johnny Gat: "Check it out: Eesh has a recording session in a few minutes. That's when we make her disappear and give the Vice Kings a nice "fuck you" while we're at it. I want you to take Aisha to her session, but on the way stop at the chop shop to have your ride loaded up with some C4. Park the car at the studio and get the hell outta there. Eesh, make sure someone sees you before you jump out."
Aisha: "Johnny, I really appreciate--"
Johnny Gat: "Whatever, I was gonna blow that place up anyway."
Old Friends full CUTSCENES 0208
— "Old Friends" cutscene
Aisha: "Are you new? I don't remember you hanging around the Row."
Aisha: "So does Johnny talk about me at all?"
Aisha: "None of this would have happened if I didn't sign on with Warren."
Aisha: "Thanks for getting me out of this."
Aisha: "I never should've gotten mixed up with the Vice Kings."
Aisha: "So uh, you don't talk much do you?"
Aisha: "Hey hey hey, slow down, we don't want to hit anything."
Aisha: "We're not gonna make it. Why did I let Johnny talk me into this?"
Aisha: "Right on time."
— Drive dialogue
Fan: "Aisha, why haven't you called me back!"
Aisha: "Oh God, him again?"
Number 1 Fan full CUTSCENES 0216
— "#1 Fan" cutscene
Stalker: "Hey you stay away from my girl!"
Stalker: "She's mine, you understand me!"
Stalker: "Aisha, I need you!"
— Stalker attacking
Aisha: "For the last time, leave me alone!"
Aisha: "This guy's been harassing me for weeks, he's crazy!"
Aisha: "Oh God, oh God, oh God!"
Aisha: "Stay away from me!"
Aisha: "I told you I wasn't interested!"
Aisha: "Get away from me you creep!"
Aisha: "We're gonna die!"
Aisha: "I don't care if you are my biggest fan, I'm not gonna marry you!"
— Car takes damage from Stalker
Stalker: "Nothing will keep me from her!"
Stalker: "I won't let you have her!"
Stalker: "Why are you making this difficult?"
— Stalker's car takes damage
Stalker: "It can't end like this, we were meant to be together..."
Aisha: "I guess I don't need that restraining order anymore."
— Stalker is killed
Aisha: "Where are you goin'?"
Aisha: "Get in here and drive!"
Aisha: "We gotta get there before this thing explodes!"
Aisha: "Don't leave me here!"
Aisha: "Get back in here or I'm calling Johnny!"
— After Playa gets out of the car
Aisha: "Oh my God!"
Aisha: "Are we dead?"
Aisha: "Be careful, we're sitting in a bomb!"
Aisha: "(screams)"
Aisha: "It didn't go off did it?"
— After running into something
Aisha: "It's just like my first date with Johnny."
Aisha: "God, are they okay?"
Aisha: "I'm sure they're fine, just drive."
Aisha: "You're crazier than Johnny!"
Aisha: "This isn't happening."
— After running someone over
Aisha: "We gotta hurry!"
Aisha: "We're running out of time."
Aisha: "We gotta get there."
Aisha: "Are we gonna make it?"
Aisha: "If we don't get to the studio soon, we're dead!"
— Timer warning
Aisha: "Thank God."
Aisha: "You had me worried there."
Aisha: "Time to disappear."
Aisha: "We made it."
Aisha: "That was close."
— Upon arriving at the studio
Receptionist: "Running a little late today?"
Aisha: "Hey now, you gotta look good to sound good."
Receptionist: "Want me to let 'em know you're in?"
Aisha: "Would you do that for me?"
Receptionist: "She's here, Mr. Williams."
The 7 Day Theory full CUTSCENES 0212
— "The 7 Day Theory" cutscene
... and a Better Life
Playa is on the phone with Johnny
Playa: "You in position Johnny?"
Johnny Gat: "Oh yeah..."
Playa: "Just make sure I get to Vogel."
Paparazzi: "Mr. Vogel, Mr. Vogel!"
Dane Vogel: "As most of you know, the Ultor Board of Directors were assassinated the other night...and while we at Ultor would like to take the time to mourn their passing, sadly that's a luxury we don't have. The Corporate Office has named me Chairman, and I want to personally let you all know not only will business continue as usual, but we will be taking even greater strides forward. Monica Hughes has graciously green lit a project that's very dear to us at Ultor...the revitalization of Shivington."
Dane Vogel: "In the coming days-"
Playa: "Shit..."
Ultor security guard: "Mr. Vogel, come with us."
Johnny Gat calls Playa
Johnny Gat: "You kill that asshole Vogel yet?"
Playa (Male Voice 1): "Not yet...he's got the Philips Building in lockdown, I don't know how to get in..."
Playa (Male Voice 2): "Workin' on it...he put the Phillips Building in lockdown."
Playa (Male Voice 3): "The bitch is hiding in the Philips Building...the whole thing's in lockdown..."
Playa (Female Voice 1): "I'm tryin', the guys slippery...right now he's got the Philips Building in lockdown, I can't get to him..."
Playa (Female Voice 2): "He ran into the Philips Building, he's got the whole place in lockdown..."
Playa (Female Voice 3): "The bastard is hiding in the Philips Building, the damn thing's in lock down, I can't get in."
Johnny Gat: "There's security stations all over the outside of that thing. You take a helicopter and blow those things up you'll crash their security..."
Dane Vogel: "Alright, let's not be too hasty here...you're upset, you're frustrated..."
Dane Vogel: "And you've got a gun. Which, ya know, I'd really like it if you'd put away."
Playa: "You should have thought of that before you sent a team to wipe out my gang."
Dane Vogel: "I tried telling the board that going after the Saints was a big mistake."
Playa: "They should have listened to you."
Dane Vogel: "Believe me, right now I'm agreeing with you 100 percent... but ya have to look at the positives, you're alive, they're dead and you have the Saints number 1 fan running Ult-"
Playa raises their gun and executes Vogel mid-sentence with a bullet to the mouth.
Pierce: "We missed it?"
Shaundi: "Told ya...now pay up."
Playa: "Where the fuck were you guys?"
Pierce: "Traffic..."
Playa: "What?"
Shaundi: "He's not joking, the roads've been blocked off."
Playa: "You see Gat out there?"
Shaundi: "Oh he's fine. He's still out there killing cops."
Playa: "Figures."
Playa calls Johnny Gat
Johnny Gat: "What is it?"
Playa: "It's done, time to pull outta there."
Johnny Gat: "You sure? GET THE FUCK OFF OF ME! I mean, I'm not runnin' out of ammo anytime soon."
Playa: "I'm sure....see ya back home."
Johnny Gat: "Later."
Pierce: "Who you callin' now?"
Playa: "Our ride."
Tobias: "Welcome aboard..."
Pierce: "So whadda we do now?"
Playa: "This is our city...we do whatever the fuck we wanna do..."
Anna: "So how does the incident at the Phillips Building affect your recently announced Shivington renovation?"
Monica Hughes: "It doesn't...if I learned one thing from my husband it's that we can't let terror grip our lives. These 3rd Street Saints want to cause chaos, and the moment we alter the way we live our lives because of fear we're empowering the Saints even more."
Anna: "So we can be expecting some great things to come from Monica Hughes?"
Monica Hughes: "Trust me Anna, like my husband, I only think big."
(Assumed channel change)
Young white male presenter: "...making this Aisha's 8th posthumous record to go triple platinum. In other news... Dane Vogel, newly appointed Ultor Chairman and number 3 on our list of Sexiest Corporate Power Players, was shot and defenestrated today..."
(Assumed channel change)
Troy: "As of this time we have yet to apprehend the assassins responsible for Dane Vogel's death, but rest assured we will find them..."
(Assumed channel change)
Announcer: "Ultor: A brighter future, and a better life."
106.66 The Blood
Caller: "I just wanted to say that I think the music on this station is making my son do drugs"
John John: "Oh no, that's terrible, you need to get him some help right away!"
Caller: "Hey, don't you dare tell me how to raise my boy!"
John John: "Anyone on drugs needs all the loving help we can provide. While I transfer your call to the proper authorities, we should all feel the love as we listen to Suicide Jag by Chemlab."
The Blood son doing drugs radio misc media 00309
— Redneck calls The Blood
3 Count Beat Down
Playa - Male 1: "Angel, what advice can you give me for my fight with Killbane?"
Angel: "Don't fight him."
Playa - Male 1: "You know I have to."
Angel: "Let me do it..."
Playa - Male 1: "Angel..."
Angel: "I've been living with this shame for years. Give me the chance to make it right."
Playa - Male 1: "You think you can beat him?"
Angel: "All I need is the opportunity."
Playa - Male 1: "Alright, how can I help?"
Angel: "Before I can fight, I need to reclaim my honor."
Playa - Male 1: "How do you do that?"
Angel: "Meet me at the 3 Count Casino and I'll show you."
— Pre-mission phone call (Male 1)
Angel: "I don't want you to fight Killbane"
Playa - Male 2: "The fuck you say?"
Angel: "This is between me and him."
Playa - Male 2: "I think he kinda involved me when he framed the saints for attacking Stilwater"
Angel: "I'm a Saint now...let me handle this for you."
Playa - Male 2: "You have a lot of ring rust, man."
Angel: "I've been praying for redemption...I won't let this chance slip me by."
Playa - Male 2: "Ok man, you got it."
Angel: "Thank you."
Playa - Male 2: "Anything I can do to help you get ready?"
Angel: "There's only one thing I need. Meet me at the 3 Count Casino."
Playa - Male 2: "See you there..."
— Pre-mission phone call (Male 2)
Angel: "Listen, you can't fight Kilbane."
Playa - Male 3: "What the fuck are you talking about."
Angel: "This is about honor. My honor."
Playa - Male 3: "Fuck your honor, Killbane needs to be taken down."
Angel: "And you think you're the one to do it? You don't know a wrist lock from a pad lock."
Playa - Male 3: "I think that's a little harsh."
Angel: "Trust me. I can do this."
Playa - Male 3: "It's that important to you?"
Angel: "Nothing is more important."
Playa - Male 3: "Then I guess we have to make it happen."
Angel: "Go to the 3 Count Casino then. Together we can right a wrong."
— Pre-mission phone call (Male 3)
Angel: "Now that the competition is no longer in the fight, I'm free to take on Killbane."
Playa - Female 1: "You? Don't get it twisted buddy, I'm taking on Killbane."
Angel: "You wouldn't understand living with the shame I have."
Playa - Female 1: "Then be happy when you see him fall down at Murderbrawl."
Angel: "Unless I redeem myself against him, it'll never go away."
Playa - Female 1: "So you want to step into the ring yourself? Are you even ready for a fight like that?"
Angel: "I've been practicing for years. I know I'm ready."
Playa - Female 1: "Well... good luck, I guess..."
Angel: "I still need your help to prepare."
Playa - Female 1: "What do you mean?"
Angel: "Meet me at the 3 Count Casino and I'll show you."
— Pre-mission phone call (Female 1)
Angel: "You can't fight Killbane."
Playa - Female 2: "WHAT?"
Angel: "He took everything from me, I need redemption"
Playa - Female 2: "Do you think you can win?"
Angel: "There's just one thing I need."
Playa - Female 2: "What's that."
Angel: "My mask."
Playa - Female 2: "I think there's a Let's Pretend on the way to the arena..."
Angel: "Not good enough. I want what Killbane took from me...and I know where he's keeping it."
Playa - Female 2: "Where?"
Angel: "The 3 Count Casino."
Playa - Female 2: "Oh this is going to be interesting..."
— Pre-mission phone call (Female 2)
Playa - Female 3: "Hey Angel, I was wondering if you could help me train for my big fight"
Angel: "No."
Playa - Female 3: "What?"
Angel: "I need to be the one to finish Killbane."
Playa - Female 3: "I don't think..."
Angel: "There's nothing I have trained harder for than reclaiming my title from him. I need to do this."
Playa - Female 3: "And he won't see that coming?"
Angel: "He knows I won't fight him right now."
Playa - Female 3: "How will Murderbrawl be different?"
Angel: "Come to the 3 Count Casino and I'll show you."
— Pre-mission phone call (Female 3)
Playa - Zombie: "Grunts"
Angel: "I'm sorry, but no."
Playa - Zombie: "Babbles"
Angel: "I don't expect you to understand."
Playa - Zombie: "Sneers"
Angel: "This isn't about that. I need to fight Killbane myself."
Playa - Zombie: "Grumbles"
Angel: "Exactly."
Playa - Zombie: "Roars"
Angel: "There is something you can do..."
Playa - Zombie: "Sneers"
Angel: "Come ot the 3 Count. I'll explain more there."
— Pre-mission phone call (Zombie)
Playa: "Why are we here?"
Angel: "Losing his mask is the ultimate shame a Luchador can feel. I can't steal it back. I need to earn it."
Playa: "Alright, how do we do that?"
Angel: "We hurt a lot of people."
— "Cutscene"
Playa - Female 1: "So what are we doing, guys?"
Playa - Female 2: "You have a plan, yes?"
Playa - Female 3: "What are we doing here?"
Playa - Male 1: "So what's the plan, here?"
Playa - Male 2: "So what are we doin' here?"
Playa - Male 3: "So what's the plan, here?"
Playa - Zombie: "Babbles"
Angel: "We tear this place apart until someone who knows where my mask is shows up."
Playa - Female 1: "And who would that be?"
Playa - Female 2: "Like who?"
Playa - Female 3: "Someone important?"
Playa - Male 1: "What happened to earning it?"
Playa - Male 2: "You lookin' for someone in particular?"
Playa - Male 3: "Like who?"
Playa - Zombie: "Grumbles"
Angel: "This is close enough."
Playa - Female 1: "Guess I'll take your word for it."
Playa - Female 2: "Good enough. Let's do this."
Playa - Female 3: "Then let's get started..."
Playa - Male 1: "Whatever you say boss."
Playa - Male 2: "Then we should start fuckin' this place up."
Playa - Male 3: "Whatever you say, mate."
Playa - Zombie: "Snarls"
— "Mission Start"
Angel: "There! That's the Casino Manager!"
Playa - Female 1: "Excuse me manager, but if I could talk to you for a second..."
Playa - Female 2: "Shall we introduce ourselves?"
Playa - Female 3: "Grab him before he runs off!"
Playa - Male 1: "Let's have a little chat, then..."
Playa - Male 2: "That guy? I'm sure he'll beg to tell you everything."
Playa - Male 3: "Let's have us a little chat, then..."
Playa - Zombie: "Grumbles"
— "See Manager"
Casino manager: "What are you doing to my casino?!"
Angel: "Where is Killbane keeping my mask?"
Casino manager: "Okay, okay! It's gotta be in the vault, behind the teller cages!"
— "Threaten Manager"
Playa - Female 1: "Why didn't you get your mask back sooner?"
Playa - Female 2: "If you knew Killbane had your mask, why didn't you go look for it?"
Playa - Female 3: "He had your mask all this time? You could have taken it already."
Playa - Male 1: "If you knew he kept your mask, why didn't you look for it earlier?"
Playa - Male 2: "Why did you wait this long to go after your mask?"
Playa - Male 3: "If you knew he kept your mask, why didn't you look for it earlier?"
Playa - Zombie: "Mumbles"
Angel: "He broke my spirit, I didn't think I was worthy enough to get it back."
Playa - Female 1: "What made you feel worthy again?"
Playa - Female 2: "What changed?"
Playa - Female 3: "What's changed that made you come here now?"
Playa - Male 1: "What changed?"
Playa - Male 2: "What changed your mind?"
Playa - Male 3: "What changed?"
Playa - Zombie: "Groans"
Angel: "Meeting the Saints."
— "Fights to the Vault"
Angel: "Here it is."
Playa - Female 1: "This isn't a knock-off, right?"
Playa - Female 2: "Are you sure it is the real one?"
Playa - Female 3: "Sure it's the one?"
Playa - Male 1: "And it's the real thing?"
Playa - Male 2: "You sure this is the right one?"
Playa - Male 3: "This the real deal?"
Playa - Zombie: "Moans"
Angel: "I know every curve, every color, every mark on this mask."
Playa - Female 1: "Put it on and let's get out of here!"
Playa - Female 2: "Put on your mask, Angel, and we can go."
Playa - Female 3: "That's great. Now put it on and let's get out."
Playa - Male 1: "Then put that thing on and let's go."
Playa - Male 2: "Then put it on and lets get the fuck outta here."
Playa - Male 3: "Then put that thing on and let's go."
Playa - Zombie: "Babbles"
— "Vault Mask"
Playa - Female 1: "Okay, we really need to leave now!"
Playa - Female 2: "Time for us to be leaving."
Playa - Female 3: "I think it's time to go."
Playa - Male 1: "Time we get our asses out of here."
Playa - Male 2: "Time we got our asses on the road."
Playa - Male 3: "Time we get our asses out of here."
Playa - Zombie: "Mumbles"
Angel: "Not yet... it's time to send Killbane a message. Starting with those statues."
Playa - Female 1: "Let's do it. They're ugly anyway!"
Playa - Female 2: "Sounds good to me."
Playa - Female 3: "Sounds good to me."
Playa - Male 1: "Fine, let's tear this place up."
Playa - Male 2: "Ya know when you said you couldn't steal it, I didn't think this was what you had in mind..."
Playa - Male 3: "Fine with me."
Playa - Zombie: "Grumbles"
— "Destroy Statues"
Playa - Female 1: "Bye-bye, hideousity!"
Playa - Female 2: "Bad art deserves this."
Playa - Male 1: "Who wants to look at these, anyway..."
Playa - Zombie: "Grumbles"
Playa - Female 1: "They look like they were bought on clearance."
Playa - Female 2: "Ugly, ugly, ugly."
Playa - Male 1: "How many does he need?"
Playa - Zombie: "Grunts"
Playa - Female 1: "Just giving this place a make-over..."
Playa - Female 2: "Killbane has no taste."
Playa - Male 1: "Place already looks better..."
Playa - Zombie: "Snarls"
Playa - Female 1: "This is better than talking to my shrink!"
Playa - Female 2: "Now this place doesn't look so bad."
Playa - Male 1: "I think he'll get the message."
Playa - Zombie: "Snarls"
Playa - Female 1: "We're upgrading the décor!"
Playa - Female 2: "Perhaps Killbane is watching the security feed."
Playa - Male 1: "Cheap craftsmanship."
Playa - Zombie: "Growls"
Playa - Female 1: "Everyone will thank me for this!"
Playa - Female 2: "I could do this all day."
Playa - Male 1: "This is therapeutic."
Playa - Zombie: "Garbled"
— "Statue Destroyed"
Playa - Female 1: "Those mini-guns are super deadly..."
Playa - Female 2: "Where are they getting all these mini-guns?"
Playa - Female 3: "God, enough with the mini-guns..."
Playa - Male 1: "They gotta stop giving these guys mini-guns..."
Playa - Male 2: "Another fuckin' mini-gun?"
Playa - Male 3: "They gotta stop giving these guys mini-guns..."
Playa - Zombie: "Grumbles"
Playa - Female 1: "Not another fucking brute! Gross!"
Playa - Female 2: "A second one?"
Playa - Female 3: "I'm sick of these bastards!"
Playa - Male 1: "Fuck, another one?"
Playa - Male 2: "How many of these assholes do I gotta put down?"
Playa - Male 3: "Fuck me, another one?"
Playa - Zombie: "Moans"
— "Brute Comment"
Playa - Female 1: "Time for the grand finale..."
Playa - Female 2: "Now the main event..."
Playa - Male 1: "Now the main event..."
Playa - Zombie: "Snarls"
— "Destroy Large"
Playa - Female 1: "Ready to destroy these machines?"
Playa - Female 2: "Time to destoy the machines."
Playa - Female 3: "Time to destroy these machines!"
Playa - Male 1: "Better get to destroying these machines."
Playa - Male 2: "These one armed bandits had it comin' to 'em."
Playa - Male 3: "Better get to destroying these machines."
Playa - Zombie: "Growls"
— "Do"
Playa - Female 1: "Everybody out! We're finished!"
Playa - Female 2: "Clear out the last of them, and we are done."
Playa - Female 3: "Clear everyone out, and then let's bounce."
Playa - Male 1: "Clear out the rest, then we're done here."
Playa - Male 2: "Let's kill the rest of these motherfuckers and call it a day."
Playa - Male 3: "Clear out the rest, then we're done here."
Playa - Zombie: "Growls"
— "Finish Clearing Guys"
Playa - Female 1: "Angel, watch your back, hon!"
Playa - Female 2: "Angel, you see the grenade launcher?"
Playa - Male 1: "Angel, watch out for the grenade launcher."
Playa - Zombie: "Mumbles"
Playa - Female 1: "It's grenade city over here!"
Playa - Female 2: "More grenades incoming!"
Playa - Male 1: "More grenades incoming!"
Playa - Zombie: "Growls"
— "Luchadore Specialist"
Manager: "What's going on out there?"
Manager: "What are you being payed for? Stop them!"
Manager: "Do you know who owns this casino?"
Manager: "Do I have to do everything myself?"
Manager: "3 Count Casino patrons, please remain calm while I handle the... disturbance."
— "Manager Over Speaker"
Angel: "I'm through hiding."
Angel: "My shame ends today."
Angel: "Where's my mask?"
Angel: "You won't keep me from it."
Angel: "You're in the way of redemption."
— "Pre Mask"
Angel: "Let me show you how it's done!"
Angel: "Nothing will hold me back!"
Angel: "Now you will feel pain!"
Angel: "This mask is no longer Killbane's!"
Angel: "You can't stop us!"
— "Post Mask"
3rd Street Saints
Manuel Orejuela: "What about this gang from Saint's Row?"
Hector Lopez: "A bunch of mulas, a nuisance, nothing more."
3rd Street Vice Kings
Johnny Gat: "Dex, don't worry, I have a plan."
Dex: "Johnny, your idea of a plan is taking the biggest hammer you can find and smashing whatever's in your way."
Johnny Gat: "That sounds like a plan to me."
Dex: "Yeah, a shitty one, as your whack ass robo-leg clearly proves."
Johnny Gat: "Oh, fuck you."
Dex: "Next time you try that cowboy shit, you might not walk away at all."
Johnny Gat: "No, seriously, fuck you."
Dex: "Look, I worked out a plan that will hurt the Kings, and put minimum risk on you."
Johnny Gat: "How much murderin' do I get to do."
Dex: "None."
Johnny Gat: "Your plan blows."
Dex: "Hear me out, alright? King's obviously got somethin' goin' on with the police, I'll figure that shit out. In the meantime I want you two to go out and cause some havoc. If we can turn the public's eye to the Kings then the police won't have a choice but to come down on them."
Johnny Gat: "Okay, so we go and do some damage. How do the VKs get blamed?"
Dex: "Put these on."
Johnny Gat: "I'm yellow enough as it is, Dex."
Dex: "Just put the damn shirt on."
Johnny Gat: "Fine."
Gat turns to The Protagonist
Johnny Gat: "Get dressed. We got a little peace to disturb."
Frame Job full CUTSCENES 0256
— "Frame Job" cutscene
Johnny Gat: "Alright, if the Vice Kings are gonna take the fall we gotta make sure whatever we do is caught on tape."
Johnny Gat: "Let's get started. The first thing we're gonna do is torch a couple stores."
Johnny Gat: "Whaddya say we head downtown and show 'em what we think of modern art?"
Johnny Gat: "Let's hit that ramp and knock those pins out."
Johnny Gat: "One more thing... let's find a bulldozer, there's something I'm just dyin' to do..."
Johnny Gat: "I'm getting real sick of hearin' Hughes run his mouth. I think it's time to thank him for his gift to Stilwater."
— Gat introducing each objective
Johnny Gat: "Yeah, I think they'll be feeling that in the morning."
Johnny Gat: "Ooo"
Johnny Gat: "Oh, that was nice."
Johnny Gat: "We gotta go out more often man."
Johnny Gat: "Very nice..."
— Random comment after running someone over
Johnny Gat: "Don't fuck with the Sa-- Vice Kings, don't fuck with the Vice Kings!"
Johnny Gat: "Wooo!"
Johnny Gat: "The Vice Kings own this town!"
Johnny Gat: "You see this yellow! That means I'm a Vice King!"
Johnny Gat: "Vice Kings do what we want, when we want!"
Johnny Gat: "You never shoulda messed with the Saints! Or the Vice Kings, 'cause that's what we are!"
Johnny Gat: "Benjamin King owns this town!"
Johnny Gat: "The Vice Kings are gonna tear this place up!"
Johnny Gat: "You think you can step to the 3rd Street Vice Kings!"
Johnny Gat: "You wanna fuck with us?"
— Random comment when attacking
Johnny Gat: "Help me out, I don't wanna die in these colors!"
Johnny Gat: "Remind me to thank Dex for this great plan..."
Johnny Gat: "How 'bout you keep me from getting shot!"
Johnny Gat: "This is not my day..."
Johnny Gat: "You gonna keep these fuckers off me or what?"
Johnny Gat: "Goddamn it, what are you doin' over there?"
Johnny Gat: "Bein' shot is getting a little old, man."
Johnny Gat: "Stop fucking around and kill these bitches!"
Johnny Gat: "We gotta pick it up, I ain't dying here!"
Johnny Gat: "How bout we drop these guys before they kill us both!"
— Random comment when taking damage
Johnny Gat: "You did that to make the Vice Kings look bad, right?"
Johnny Gat: "You okay to drive man?"
Johnny Gat: "Shit man, watch where you're going..."
Johnny Gat: "Could you not get us killed please?"
Johnny Gat: "Fuck it, we can steal another one."
— Random comment when driving poorly
Johnny Gat: "Hey, slow down, we're losing the news vans."
Johnny Gat: "Shit, we gotta go back for that news van."
Johnny Gat: "Yo be more careful, we don't wanna lose the van."
Johnny Gat: "Hold up, we gotta make sure we're on camera."
Johnny Gat: "Where the hell did the news van go?"
— Random comment when the news vans are not close enough
Johnny Gat: "Let's start out light. There's a bunch of newsstands downtown, go and tear those bastards apart."
Johnny Gat: "Not bad, time to step things up. Kick it to the shopping center and firebomb every mothafuckin' store they got."
Johnny Gat: "Alright, one more stop and you can come home. There's a new exibit outside the museum. How 'bout you roll over there and show 'em how much you appreciate modern art."
— Unused dialogue from a version of the mission where Johnny wasn't present.
Benjamin King: "Don't worry about it. Look, if it was one of mine I'll take care of it, but I'm tellin' ya, I don't care what colors they were wearing, it was that crew from Saint's Row I was tellin' you about. No, I'm not makin' any excu-- I will. Tell your wife I said hello. Goodbye, Alderman."
Warren Williams: "Great, now we got yo' cracka ass friends trippin'. Like I said, fuckin' with City Hall is a waste of time."
Benjamin King: "Wrong. Workin' with them is what gives us power."
Warren Williams: "Yo, fuck that. This is what gives us power."
Benjamin King: "Get the fuck outta my office."
Boiling Point full CUTSCENES 0260
— "Boiling Point" cutscene
89.0 Generation X
DJ Veteran Child: "This is Veteran Child, what you want to hear next on Gen X?"
Shaundi: "Misery Business, by Paramore"
89.0 Generation X - Shaundi calls
— Request before "Misery Business"
Matt: "Hey Veteran Child, when are you going to start playing the Feed Dogs?"
DJ Veteran Child: "I don't know, when they stop sucking?"
89.0 Generation X - Matt calls
— Request before "Hate"
Ultor Announcer: "Greetings, you've reached Ultor FM"
Dane Vogel: "I'm putting together a marketing package for Ultor's women's line, you got any ideas for a good commercial song?"
Ultor Announcer: "Certainly Mr. Vogel, perhaps "Face Down" by Red Jumpsuit Apparatus?"
Dane Vogel: "Love it!"
89.0 Ultor FM - Dane calls
— Request before "Face Down"
A Game of Clones
Phone Call: "It seems in retaliation for your pissing all over his nice clean prison, Zinyak is flooding the simulation with hostile gangs from another simulation."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Hostiles I can handle, skip to the bad part."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Eh, so I have to kill a few more people, big deal..."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "If I can't kill a few "hostiles" then something's gone seriously wrong."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "I can handle whatever that asshole throws at me."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Whatever... body count's never been a problem for me."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Just sounds like more murder... should I be worried?"
Nolan North: "I can handle whatever that asshole throws at me."
Phone Call: "The big problem is that I can't tell how they're getting in. I'll need you to investigate this when you have a moment."
— Something's Wrong in Steelport phone call
CID: "This location should work."
CID: "One moment, please."
— "Arrive at Spot"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Let's skip the small talk. What's my new power?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "So what's the deal, what can I do?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "So what's my new party trick?"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "So what cool new power do you have for me, Kinzie?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "All right, so what can I do?"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "So... what makes me a god now?"
Nolan North: "So what cool new power do you have for me, Kinzie?"
Kinzie: "Fire. Particularly, flaming bullets."
The Protagonist: "Flaming bullets? Holy shit."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Oh god. Why don't they have these things in the real world?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "God, why don't they have these things in the real world?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "God, why don't they have these things in my cotillion?"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Oh god. Why don't they have these things in the real world?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "These have been in my dream journal for so long."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Oh god. Why don't they have these things in the real world?"
Nolan North: "Oh god. Why don't they have these things in the real world?"
Kinzie: "And it's not just bullets. Try just getting close to people."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "I set people on fire just by invading their personal space? Kinzie. You are awesome."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "I set people on fire just by invading their personal space? Kinzie. You are awesome."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Wait a minute... I set people on fire just by invading their personal space? Oh my cotillion would have been way more fun. Kinzie. You are awesome."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "I set people on fire just by invading their personal space? Kinzie. You are awesome."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "I set people on fire by just invading their personal space? Kinzie. You are awesome."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "I set people on fire just by invading their personal space? Kinzie. You are awesome."
Nolan North: "I set people on fire just by invading their personal space? Kinzie I could kiss you! But then you'd be set on fire..."
Kinzie: "Have fun!"
— "Buff Tutorial"
CID: "There's a lot of interference at ground level. It is too much for me to get a read."
CID: "I... need you to throw me into the sky."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "To lazy to fly?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Why? You can fly."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "CID... you can fly."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "You can fly, CID."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Believe me, I'll do it, but can't you fly?"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "You can fly CID, do it yourself."
Nolan North: "You can fly, CID."
CID: "Yes, but I cannot maintain the strength needed to scan the entirety of the simulation and hover at the same time."
CID: "I need you to throw me into the air."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "If you insist."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "With pleasure."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Fine..."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Little b-ball action, huh. Let's do this."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Don't have to tell me twice."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Happy to oblige..."
Nolan North: "Little b-ball action, huh. Let's do this. I played varsity."
— "CID Cannot Ping"
CID: "Its weakest point is here at the rear."
CID: "I will distract it to give you an opportunity to shoot it."
— "CID Finds Weak Point"
CID: "Go ahead. Throw me into the generator."
CID: "If you hurry, you will still be young when you throw me into the generator."
CID: "If you want the shield down, throwing me into the shield generator is the thing to do."
CID: "You are right. It is best to wait until the shield generator turns itself off."
CID: "You need to throw me into the generator."
— "CID Shield Throw"
Kinzie: "Rip him apart!"
The Protagonist: "Woo. Tingly."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "All right... let's see what that warden had for me..."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Kinzie... I want to get the hang of my new power."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Kinzie... let's see what I can do now."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Can you, uh, load up a training room? I'd like to try out what I got."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Kinzie... I wanna take my new power for a test drive..."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Boot up a training room... I want to know what I'm packing..."
Nolan North: "Can you, uh, load up a training room? I'd like to try out what I got."
Kinzie: "Sure. One moment."
— "Kill Warden Power Up"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "What's the plan to stop these relays, CID?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "So how do we stop Zinyak from changing the simulation?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Okay CID, how do we take out the relays?"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "All right, CID, how do we take these relays and stop Zinyak from messing with the simulation."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "So how do we take down these relays?"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "You're a know it all robot. How do we stop the relays?"
Nolan North: "All right, CID, how do we take these relays and stop Zinyak from messing with the simulation."
CID: "I'll need to find the relays first. Some areas of the simulation offer a more advantageous mapping point than others. Let's get to one."
The Protagonist: "After you."
— "Mission Start"
CID: "Ensuring my safety would be advantageous to us both."
CID: "I am almost done. Do not let me die."
CID: "If I die, please plant a flower where I fall."
— "Protect CID Nag"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Die, you stupid portal!"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Genki trained me for this moment..."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "I can do his all day..."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "This thing can't stay open forever..."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Can't this portal just... implode already?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Get back there!"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "How many of you are there?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Just keep it up."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Another one gone!"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Gotta keep the pressure on..."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "I could do this all day."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Why won't this thing explode?!"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Nothing but net!"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Oh yeah!"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Swoosh!"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Woohoo! Two points!"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Just close already!"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Just give up, Zinyak!"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Woo!"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "YES!"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Come on Zinyak, you have to try harder than that!"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Fuck, how many people do I have to throw into this thing?"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Go back to where you came from!"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Gotta close that portal..."
Nolan North: "Nothing but net!"
Nolan North: "Oh yeah!"
Nolan North: "Swoosh!"
Nolan North: "Yeah! Two points!"
— "Source Basket"
The Protagonist: "What the fuck is this portal?"
Kinzie: "I don't have time to explain this. Just pick up people and throw them into it."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Yeah, fuck context!"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "I like it when I can understand what the fuck you're talking about..."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Holy shit, that actually made sense..."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Wow, that may be the simplest explanation you've ever given."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Please have less time to explain things in the future..."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "I like it."
Nolan North: "Wow, that may be the simplest explanation you've ever given."
— "Source Portal Found Arrive"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Well if it isn't the Stilwater default player..."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Well if it isn't the Stilwater default player..."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Well if it isn't the Stilwater default player..."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "What the hell? Is that..."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Well if it isn't the Stilwater default player..."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Well if it isn't the Stilwater default player..."
Nolan North: "What the hell? Is that..."
— "SR1 PC Arrives"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Why are there two of me now?!"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Why are there two of me now?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Why are there two of me now?!"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Why are there two of me now?!"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Why are there two of me now?!"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Why are there two of me now?!"
Nolan North: "Why are there two of me now?!"
Kinzie: "Shit! It's the co-op player!"
— "SR2 CoOp Arrives"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Well if it isn't the OTHER Stilwater default player..."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Well if it isn't the OTHER Stilwater default player..."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Well if it isn't the OTHER Stilwater default player..."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "What the hell? Is that OTHER Stilwater me?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Well if it isn't the OTHER Stilwater default player..."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Well if it isn't the OTHER Stilwater default player..."
Nolan North: "What the hell? Is that OTHER Stilwater me?"
— "SR2 PC Arrives"
Kinzie: "Boss, if I'm gonna track where these gangs are coming from you need to destroy the relays masking the signal."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "CID'll be able to take down the relays, right?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "CID will be able to help me find the relays, no?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "CID will be able to give me a hand with these relays, right?"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "So is taking down these relays something CID can help with?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "CID can help me find the relays, right?"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "CID can help us take down the relays, right?"
Nolan North: "So is taking down these relays something CID can help with?"
Kinzie: "Actually, yes. I'm sending CID in right now."
— "Talk to Kinzie"
The Protagonist: "Since when did the Vice Kings have giant robots?"
CID: "The Zin appear to have quite a few technologically advanced forms. I'm curious why it is you chose a metal basketball for my shell."
The Protagonist: "C'mon, it's cute."
CID: "I have personality. I don't need to be cute. I could use weapons though."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Learn to live with dissapointment, CID."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Not happening."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Crazy robot with guns? I'll pass."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "What, and have you steal all my kills?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Yeah... give the disembodied voice guns... that doesn't have movie of the week written all over it."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "I like you armless just fine."
Nolan North: "You wanna get laid, you need to be cute."
— "Tank Ball Arrive"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "One less... rolly thing."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Zinyak'll have to try harder than that."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Didn't think that thing was ever gonna blow up..."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Yes! Take that, tank ball!"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Thank God..."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Fucking robots..."
Nolan North: "Yes! Yeah! Take that, tank ball!"
— "Tank Ball Destroyed"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Jesus, what do I have to do to kill this thing?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "I'm not even denting it!"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "How do I destroy this thing?"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "This thing is armored out the ass. How do I destroy it?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "How do I get through it's armor?"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Any tips on how to stop this fucking murder ball?"
Nolan North: "This thing is armored out the ass. How do I destroy it?"
— "Tank Ball Fight"
CID: "Focus on the rear panels."
CID: "Keep shooting at the rear."
CID: "Stay behind it."
— "Tank Ball"
CID: "Throw me into the shield generator and I will disable it."
CID: "Same as before. Just throw me into the shield generator."
— "Throw CID to Shield"
CID: "I need to be higher!"
CID: "This would be so much easier if I could throw myself."
CID: "Throw me higher!"
CID: "I am not going to beg. Okay. Fine. I am begging. Throw me into the air. Please."
CID: "I cannot scan the area if you do not get me to a higher elevation."
CID: "Will you please throw me into the air."
— "Throw Higher Nag"
CID: "Ah. Here is the relay."
CID: "Surely this must be worth something of value."
The Protagonist: "Sure, CID."
— "Uplink 1 Arrive"
Kinzie: "Did you just do something? Because this connection just got clearer."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "I'm just killing things, who knows what it's doing..."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "I'm just doing what I always do... mass murder."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "I'll be honest Kinzie, I'm just raising hell... glad it's doing something, though."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "I killed people. Destroyed shit. Y'know, the ushe."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "And you said thrill killing is a bad thing!"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Just doing my thing Kinzie... glad it's making a difference"
Nolan North: "Killed people. Destroyed shit. Y'know, the ushe."
CID: "I need to scan the area again. Let us go to another mapping point."
— "Uplink 1 Destroyed"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Where is Zinyak getting these guys from?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "This is like a scrap book of old murder victims... where are they coming from?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Why is Zinyak bringing back these guys? I already beat 'em..."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Where are all these old gangmembers coming from?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Where's this retro shit coming from?"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "These gangs aren't normally in my simulation, where are they coming from?"
Nolan North: "Where are all these old gang members coming from?"
Kinzie: "Zinyak must be pulling the data from somewhere. As with all the simulations, these manifest from the subconscious of the captives hooked into the machines."
The Protagonist: "So whose subconscious are we dealing with?"
Kinzie: "Shaundi says the mnemonic mapping fits the profile of Johnny."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "You see? I told you Johnny was alive."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "See, I told you Johnny was still alive."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "You see? I told you Johnny was alive."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "See? I told you Johnny was alive."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Are you sure?"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "You see? I told you Johnny was alive!"
Nolan North: "Wait, Johnny? Are you sure?"
Kinzie: "I need to look into this but I... I'll be in touch."
CID: "Let us go. I am earning this date."
— "Uplink 2 Destroyed"
CID: "Hm. I suppose Asha is also a pairing option."
The Protagonist: "Are we still talking about this date nonsense?"
CID: "It is not nonsense. I am not doing this solely for your benefit, you know."
— "Uplink 3 Arrive"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Kinzie, I need an update on Johnny..."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Where are we with Johnny?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Kinzie... about Johnny..."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Kinzie, let's go back to talking about Johnny."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Tell me more about Johnny, Kinzie..."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "What's going on with Johnny, Kinzie..."
Nolan North: "Kinzie, let's go back to talking about Johnny."
Kinzie: "My best guess is that he's here too."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Then let's quit wasting time and find a way to get him back."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "We need more information. Can you can trace where these gang members are coming from?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "We need to find him. Can't you back trace the gangs that are coming out of his mind?"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "You can trace all these gangs back to him, right? You can find his simulation?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "We already new that! You can trace all these gangs back to him, right?"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "We need more than that! Find a way to track him down!"
Nolan North: "You can trace all these gangs back to him, right? You can find his simulation?"
Kinzie: "Um. Sure. I'll... just focus on those relays."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "I took out three of the relays. That's it, right?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "I took out three of the relays. That's it, right?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "I took out three of the relays. That's it, right?"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "I took out three of the relays. That's it, right?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "I took out three of the relays. That's it, right?"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "I took out three of the relays. That's it, right?"
Nolan North: "I took out the three relays. That's it, right?"
CID: "There is one more. Follow me."
— "Uplink 3 Destroyed"
The Protagonist: "These relays have shields, Kinzie."
Kinzie: "CID, can you take them down?"
CID: "For the hand of a loving partner, I would do almost anything."
Kinzie: "I'm not going on a date with you, CID."
— "Uplink 3 Shielded"
CID: "This is the last relay I have found."
CID: "After careful consideration, I am firm in my intent to court Shaundi."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "If you're lucky she won't gouge out your one eye."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Godspeed, CID."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Good luck CID. You'll need it."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Court Shaundi, huh. Well, good luck."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Good luck with that."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Good luck buddy."
Nolan North: "Court Shaundi, huh. Well, good luck."
CID: "I do not need luck. I am quite charming. And this shell offers a variety of options when it comes to..."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Stop CID. Just. Stop."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "You're an adroit lover, I get it..."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Didn't need to hear that."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "How're you gonna... CID, this is... okay, I'm curious but NO. This is not the time for that discussion."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Too much sharing."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Whatever you do is your business, just leave me out of it..."
Nolan North: "CID, this is... okay, I'm curious but NO. This is not the time for that discussion."
— "Uplink 4 Arrival"
CID: "Cover me."
CID: "Just a bit longer."
CID: "Almost done."
— "Uplink 4 Defend"
The Protagonist: "What's next, Kinzie?"
Kinzie: "Now that the relays aren't confusing the signal, I can see the source of the influx. CID will take you to it."
CID: "Follow me."
— "Uplink 4 Destroyed"
Kinzie: "You've got a Warden coming for you. I'll get you out."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "No. No way. I still have another slot in my power menu. I want to fill it with something."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "No. No way. I still have another slot in my power menu. I want to fill it with something."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "No. No way. Bring up the weapon select, there's an empty slot in my power menu, and I'm gonna fill it with something."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "No. No way. I still have another slot in my power menu. I want to fill it with something."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "No. No way. I still have another slot in my power menu. I want to fill it with something."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "No. No way. I still have another slot in my power menu. I want to fill it with something."
Nolan North: "No. No way. I still have another slot in my power menu. I want to fill it with something."
Kinzie: "FINE. You know what to do."
— "Warden Incoming"
CID: "This is important work I am doing."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Yeah..."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Go on..."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Yes?"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Um. Sure."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Okay..."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "I guess so..."
Nolan North: "Um. Sure."
CID: "Nobody else on your team could do this, right?"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Where is this going, CID..."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "And here comes the shake down..."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Just say what you want, CID."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "What are you getting at, CID?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "What do you want, CID"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Let me guess..."
Nolan North: "What are you getting at, CID?"
CID: "I want to be compensated for my contribution."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Just tell me what you want, CID."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "With what? Money?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "You have a body, what else could you want?"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Compensated? What do you want?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Whaddya want..."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Get to the point. What do you want."
Nolan North: "Compensated? What do you want?"
CID: "A woman."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Not it."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "CID. You wouldn't even know what to do with one."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "CID. Honey. Sugar. I don't think you're equipped to handle a woman."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "A woman?! What the fuck are you going to do with a woman?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Dude, you're a floating robot with no arms, the fuck you need a woman for?"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "A woman? Oh that's rich..."
Nolan North: "A woman?! What the fuck are you going to do with a woman?"
CID: "I am in the prime of my life."
— "Way to 1st Relay"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Demanding dates as payment doesn't score points with the ladies, CID."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Cupid's arrows are cruel, CID."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "CID... girls don't like dating bossy robots."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Looks like she shot you down, CID."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Not happening, CID."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Crash and burn, CID."
Nolan North: "Looks like she shot you down, CID."
Kinzie: "I don't think so!"
CID: "I've been thinking. As compensation for my assistance, I would like to go out on a date with Kinzie."
CID: "Fine. Then perhaps Shaundi would enjoy my company."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Promise me I get to be there when you ask her..."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Bohemian Shaundi might go along with it..."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Girls don't like being consolation prizes either."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Yeah, maybe if we were back in Stilwater you'd have a shot."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Dude, Shaundi will kick your ass."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Maybe CID... maybe."
Nolan North: "Maybe if we were back in Stilwater you'd have a shot."
— "Way to 2nd Relay"
A Pleasant Day
Playa - Female 1: "Hey, whoa, what--?"
Playa - Female 2: "...unh... Quoi?"
Playa - Female 3: "Hunh, what--"
Playa - Male 1: "Hey, whoa, what--"
Playa - Male 2: "Hey, whoa, what--?"
Playa - Male 3: "Hey, whoa, what--?"
Nolan North: "Hey, whoa, what--?"
Playa: "Goodness me, what a dream."
— "Mission Start"
Playa: "Gosh, what a glorious day!"
Playa - Female 1: "Mmm. Something sure smells tasty!"
Playa - Female 2: "Mmm. Breakfast certainly smells delicious!"
Playa - Female 3: "Mmm. Breakfast sure smells good!"
Playa - Male 1: "Mmm. Breakfast sure smells good!"
Playa - Male 2: "Mmm. Breakfast smells terrific!"
Playa - Male 3: "Mmm. Breakfast smells scrumptious!"
Nolan North: "Mmm. Breakfast sure smells good!"
— "At Home"
Playa enters the kitchen
Shaundi: "Morning, dear! I made your favorite breakfast!"
Playa sits down to eat pancakes
Shaundi: "Oh! Mr. King from across the street is going out of town for a few weeks. He was wondering if you could check his mail for him."
Shaundi: "Oh, and your friend Pierce called. I'm sure he has some crazy new get-rich scheme. Oh, that Pierce. Such a card."
Shaundi: "And someone named Dex stopped by earlier. I didn't recognize him so I just sent him away."
— "Breakfast Convo"
Shaundi: "I think I heard Timmy deliver the paper earlier. Could you fetch it, dear?"
Playa - Female 1: "Sure thing!"
Playa - Female 2: "But of course!"
Playa - Female 3: "No problem, hon!"
Playa - Male 1: "Sure thing, dear!"
Playa - Male 2: "You got it, sweetheart!"
Playa - Male 3: "Right away, dear!"
Nolan North: "Sure thing, dear!"
— "After Breakfast"
Playa - Female 1: "I wonder what's new in the world today."
Playa - Female 2: "I wonder what is going on in the world today."
Playa - Female 3: "I wonder what's up in the world today."
Playa - Male 1: "Ooh, I wonder what's going on in the world today."
Playa - Male 2: "I wonder what's happening in the world today."
Playa - Male 3: "I wonder what is going on in the world today."
Nolan North: "I wonder what's going on in the world today."
— "Grabbing Paper"
Sheriff: "You ready to meet the fine people of Steelport?"
Sheriff: "Well, get in the car."
— "Sheriff Arrives"
Sheriff: "Don't wanna be late now."
Sheriff: "Folks are waiting."
Sheriff: "Ready when you are."
Sheriff: "You coming?"
— "Sheriff Car"
Playa - Female 1: "Wait... don't I usually drive?"
Playa - Female 2: "Ah... Do I not usually drive?"
Playa - Female 3: "Hang on now... don't I usually drive?"
Playa - Male 1: "Uh... don't I usually drive?"
Playa - Male 2: "Uh... don't I usually drive?"
Playa - Male 3: "Don't I usually drive?"
Nolan North: "Uh... don't I usually drive?"
Sheriff: "It's your world. Go ahead."
— "Sheriff Car Approach"
Sheriff: "Boy, they sure are anxious to meet you."
Playa - Female 1: "They?"
Playa - Female 2: "They?"
Playa - Female 3: "Who're they?"
Playa - Male 1: "They?"
Playa - Male 2: "They, who?"
Playa - Male 3: "And by "They" you mean...?"
Nolan North: "Uhh... they?"
Sheriff: "Hehe. Why, you do have a queer sense of humor."
Playa - Female 1: "Is it just me, or does everything look kinda weird?"
Playa - Female 2: "Why does this all look so odd?"
Playa - Female 3: "Why's everything look so strange?"
Playa - Male 1: "Why does this all look so weird?"
Playa - Male 2: "Why does this place look so...white bread?"
Playa - Male 3: "Why's this all look so... bizarre?"
Nolan North: "Why does this all look so weird?"
Sheriff: "Now, what's that you say?"
Playa - Female 1: "Just a nagging feeling, like this is all--"
Playa - Female 2: "Something is wrong. This is all--"
Playa - Female 3: "Something ain't right. This is all--"
Playa - Male 1: "Something's wrong. This is all--"
Playa - Male 2: "Something's just off. This is all--"
Playa - Male 3: "Something's not right. This is all--"
Nolan North: "Something's wrong. This is all--"
Sheriff: "Can't wait to get out to the lake this weekend. I hear the fish are really bitin'."
Playa - Female 1: "The fish are--huh? What are you talking about?"
Playa - Female 2: "The fish--? Please do not change the subject."
Playa - Female 3: "The fish are--what the heck're you talking about?"
Playa - Male 1: "The fish are--what are you talking about?"
Playa - Male 2: "The fish...? Wait, what were we talking about?"
Playa - Male 3: "What fish? What are you talking about?"
Nolan North: "The fish are--what are you talking about?"
Sheriff: "Don't you worry now. We're almost there."
— "Car Ride"
Playa - Female 1: "Why won't this car change lanes?"
Playa - Female 2: "Why can I not change lanes?"
Playa - Female 3: "Why can't I change lanes?"
Playa - Male 1: "Why can't I change lanes?"
Playa - Male 2: "Any reason I can't change lanes?"
Playa - Male 3: "Why can't I make a lane change?"
Nolan North: "Why can't I change lanes?"
Sheriff: "Safest town in America."
— "Car Hits Wall 01"
Playa - Female 1: "What's happening...?"
Playa - Female 2: "What is that?"
Playa - Female 3: "What the--?"
Playa - Male 1: "What's going on..."
Playa - Male 2: "What is this?"
Playa - Male 3: "What's going on..."
Nolan North: "What's going on..."
Playa - Female 1: "Wait, there is definitely something wrong with this car..."
Playa - Female 2: "Something is not right with this car..."
Playa - Female 3: "Definitely something wrong with this car..."
Playa - Male 1: "Uh, I think there's something wrong with this car..."
Playa - Male 2: "Feels like something's wrong with this car..."
Playa - Male 3: "Strange, but I think something's wrong with this car..."
Nolan North: "Uh, I think there's something wrong with this car..."
Sheriff: "Oop, careful now."
— "Car Hits Wall"
Sheriff: "Well, here we are."
Sheriff: "Why don't ya glad-hand a bit. We got time."
— "Diner Arrival"
Civilian: "Well, look who's here!"
Civilian: "Wish I woulda showered!"
Civilian: "Wow! The President! In the flesh!"
Civilian: "I almost voted for ya!"
Civilian: "If only my wife were alive to see this!"
Civilian: "Wowee! You could almost touch 'em!"
Civilian: "I should find a baby for them to kiss!"
Civilian: "I'm never washing my eyes again!"
Civilian: "We're breathing the same air!"
— "Diner Outside"
Playa - Female 1: "Ow! My toe!"
Playa - Female 2: "Ow! My toe!"
Playa - Female 3: "Ow! My toe!"
Playa - Male 1: "Confound it, my toe!"
Playa - Male 2: "Ow! My toe!"
Playa - Male 3: "Ow! My toe!"
Nolan North: "Ow! My toe!"
— "Stubbed"
Photographer: "Can I get a picture?!"
Playa poses
Photographer: "Aww, thank ya kindly!"
Sheriff: "Looks like it's time!"
Sheriff: "Your public is waiting."
— "Photo Op Done"
Man: "Oh my stars, it's the president![1]"
Playa: "Hi, how are... ?"
The man subtly glitches.
Playa: "What the *BLEEP*?"
Sheriff: "We don't use that kind of language here in Steelport."
All the townspeople inside the diner start advancing towards Playa, slowly and menacingly, while glitching randomly.
Playa - Female 1: "What kind of *beep* are you *beep* trying to pull?"
Playa - Female 2: "Who the *beep* are you and how the *beep* did I get here?"
Playa - Female 3: "Where the *beep* is this *beep*hole?"
Playa - Male 1: "What the *beep* is going on? Where the *beep* am I?"
Playa - Male 2: "Who the *beep* are you people? What the *beep* is this?"
Playa - Male 3: "What the *beep* is this *beep*?"
Nolan North: "What the *beep* is going on? Where the *beep* am I?"
— "Car"
Playa - Female 1: "I wanna get the *beep* away from here."
Playa - Female 2: "Pardonnez moi, but I really must get the *beep* out of here."
Playa - Female 3: "I gotta get the *beep* out of here."
Playa - Male 1: "I gotta get the *beep* out of here."
Playa - Male 2: "I'm getting the *beep* out of here."
Playa - Male 3: "I'll just be getting the *beep* out of here."
Nolan North: "I gotta get the *beep* out of here."
— "Car Leave"
Kinzie: "Hello? Hello?"
Playa - Female 1: "Kinzie? What is this? Kinzie, where are you?"
Playa - Female 2: "Kinzie? Kinzie, where are you?"
Playa - Female 3: "Kinzie? Girl, where the hell are you?"
Playa - Male 1: "Kinzie? Kinzie, where are you?"
Playa - Male 2: "Kinzie? Am I hearing things now?"
Playa - Male 3: "Kinzie? Is that really you?"
Nolan North: "Kinzie? Kinzie, where are you?"
Kinzie: "FINALLY!"
Kinzie: "Listen to me. No time to explain. But you have to break free."
Playa - Female 1: "Break free from what, Kinzie?"
Playa - Female 2: "What do you mean, break free?"
Playa - Female 3: "You mind explaining that?"
Playa - Male 1: "Break free? From what?"
Playa - Male 2: "But...I am free."
Playa - Male 3: "What am I meant to break free from?"
Nolan North: "Break free? From what?"
Kinzie: "The place you're in isn't real. Whatever it's having you do, you need to stop."
Playa - Female 1: "What, I'm just driving."
Playa - Female 2: "I am only driving a car."
Playa - Female 3: "Even if I'm only driving a car?"
Playa - Male 1: "I'm... driving a car."
Playa - Male 2: "But I'm just driving a car."
Playa - Male 3: "But I'm... driving a car."
Nolan North: "I'm... driving a car."
Kinzie: "Okay, good. There's a park nearby. Head there and gimme a sec..."
Kinzie: "Brace yourself!"
Playa - Female 1: "Brace for--Jesus H!"
Playa - Female 2: "Brace for--mon Dieu!"
Playa - Female 3: "Brace for... oh my!"
Playa - Male 1: "Brace for--whoa my God!"
Playa - Male 2: "Brace for--what the *beep*?!"
Playa - Male 3: "Brace for--Good God!"
Nolan North: "Wait, brace for--whoa my God!"
— "Diner Escape"
Kinzie: "I need some more time before I can get you out. It would be really helpful if you could just, y'know, just be you."
Playa - Female 1: "Be me?"
Playa - Female 2: "Be myself?"
Playa - Female 3: "Excuse me?"
Playa - Male 1: "Be me?"
Playa - Male 2: "Be me?"
Playa - Male 3: "Who else would I be?"
Nolan North: "Be... Nolan? Okay."
Kinzie: "This simulation is all about normalcy. Pleasantry. Order. All the things you hate. Go forth. Unleash hell."
— "Unleash"
Kinzie: "You need to do more! Bigger! Hold on, I'm sending you something."
Kinzie: "Find the cat fountain. I left you a present."
Playa picks up the RPG
Playa - Female 1: "Gosh. This is swell."
Playa - Female 2: "Boy, oh boy. This is the bee's knees."
Playa - Female 3: "Gee-willikers. This is dreamy."
Playa - Male 1: "Jeepers. This is peachy."
Playa - Male 2: "Golly. This is keen."
Playa - Male 3: "Boy-howdy. This thing sure is neato."
Nolan North: "Aww, jeepers. This is peachy."
— "Genki Fountain"
Kinzie: "You're doing great. The simulation is--oh no. Wait a minute."
Playa - Female 1: "Wait, wait, wait... What's going on, Kinzie?"
Playa - Female 2: "Wait for what, Kinzie? What is happening?"
Playa - Female 3: "Talk to me, Kinzie!"
Playa - Male 1: "Wait, wait, wait... Wait a what? What's going on?"
Playa - Male 2: "Wait a what? Kinzie, what's going on?"
Playa - Male 3: "What am I waiting for, Kinzie? What's wrong?"
Nolan North: "Wait, wait, wait... Wait a what? What's going on?"
— "Unleash Encourage"
The Sheriff falls from the sky
Sheriff: "Yeeeeeehaaaaaw!"
The Sheriff's voice changes to Zinyak's
Zinyak: "Couldn't leave well enough alone, could ya?"
Zinyak: "You had to push, and push, and push."
Zinyak: "I hope you've enjoyed your last moments."
— "Boss Fight"
Zinyak: "I'm impressed."
Playa: "Where the hell are-"
Playa: "Fuck me..."
Zinyak: "I should have realized a prison of peace would never hold a sociopath like yourself."
Playa: "I'm more of a puckish rogue."
Zinyak: "A rose by any other name..."
Playa: "Are you trying to kill me, or sleep with me?"
Zinyak: "Charming."
Playa: "There you go with those mix messages again."
Zinyak: "Then allow me to be perfectly clear..."
Zinyak: "I am the architect of your reality. I build what I want..."
Zinyak: "I destroy what I want..."
Zinyak: "And your bravado..."
Zinyak: "Means. Nothing."
Playa shoots at Zinyak with the Quickshot Pistol.
Zinyak: "Fighting back is pointless, my friend."
Zinyak: "There's nowhere to run."
Zinyak: "You belong to me."
Zinyak: "Now onto more pleasant things."
Zinyak: "I'm going to place you in your new home. Try to run again, and I'll destroy your pitiful planet. TTFN."
Wardens appear.
Zinyak: "My friends, each of you are guilty of crimes against the Zin Empire, but today is your lucky day... today you get to be a part of a new work release program..."
Zinyak: "Swear your fealty, and I will empower you to be wardens of simulation 31. You will have one purpose: Torment the President of the United States."
Zinyak: "Beyond that the world is yours to toy with. Ravage it, indulge in your basest desire, it makes no difference to me... just leave the prisoner alive."
Zinyak: "I want them broken, not dead."
Zinyak: "Go now, and tear their world asunder."
Kinzie: "Oh god. Zinyak's locked me out. You have to take him down. I can't get your body if I don't free your mind--"
Kinzie: "I'm going to get you out of there. Just hold on!"
— "Get You Out"
Kinzie: "You'll probably need to defend yourself for a bit. Here's a gun."
Playa - Female 1: "A gun? Oh. A gun. Perfect."
Playa - Female 2: "A gun? Oh. A gun. Excellent."
Playa - Female 3: "A gun? Oh. A gun. Yay."
Playa - Male 1: "A gun? Oh. A gun. Good."
Playa - Male 2: "A gun? Oh. A gun. Good."
Playa - Male 3: "A gun? Oh. A gun. Splendid."
Nolan North: "A gun? Oh, oh! A gun. Good."
— "Give Gun"
A Remote Chance
Playa - Male 1: "We're waiting too long to go after Killbane."
Viola DeWynter: "I was thinking the same thing. Come to the Broken Shillelagh. We can all talk there."
— Pre-mission phone call (Male 1)
Playa - Male 2: "Viola, I need you to meet Pierce and Shaundi at the Broken Shillelagh."
Viola DeWynter: "Is this some sort of team building thing?"
Playa - Male 2: "It's a "plot Killbane's murder" thing."
Viola DeWynter: "I'll be right there."
— Pre-mission phone call (Male 2)
Viola DeWynter: "Hello?"
Playa - Male 3: "Get the others and come to the Broken Shillelagh..."
Viola DeWynter: "I don't do pub food."
Playa - Male 3: "Too bad, I'm done fucking around."
— Pre-mission phone call (Male 3)
Viola DeWynter: "Hello?"
Playa - Female 1: "Shaundi get a hold of you?"
Viola DeWynter: "Look, don't take it the wrong way, but I don't do sports bars."
Playa - Female 1: "We need to work out how we're gonna deal with Killbane, and I want you there."
Viola DeWynter: "OK. I'll see you at the Broken Shillelagh"
— Pre-mission phone call (Female 1)
Viola DeWynter: "Something you need?"
Playa - Female 2: "A way to stop Killbane. Come to the Broken Shillelagh. We can all talk there."
Viola DeWynter: "All of us? Alright..."
Playa - Female 2: "What, don't you like Pierce?"
Viola DeWynter: "You try being called "the new girl" all the time and see how you like it. Whatever, I'll be there soon."
— Pre-mission phone call (Female 2)
Playa - Female 3: "Spread the word: we're having a war meeting at the Broken Shillelagh."
Viola DeWynter: "What's this about?"
Playa - Female 3: "Killbane."
Viola DeWynter: "Be there in 5."
— Pre-mission phone call (Female 3)
Viola DeWynter: "Killbane's still out there."
Playa - Zombie: "Roars"
Viola DeWynter: "We all have to be on top of this together."
Playa - Zombie: "Roars"
Viola DeWynter: "Alright, I'll see you at the Broken Shillelagh"
— Pre-mission phone call (Zombie)
Playa: "Alright, I am done fucking around, I want Killbane."
Viola: "You wanna hurt Killbane, you gotta hurt his reputation."
Shaundi: "So, what, humiliate him?"
Playa: "Can't we just kill the bastard?"
Viola: "Take Killbane's mask and all that's left is Eddie Pryor. It's worse than killing him."
Playa: "This is more Angel's thing."
Viola: "Killbane would never agree to fight Angel."
Playa: "He's more scared of Angel than me?"
Shaundi: "No offense, but you're kinda ridiculous."
Pierce: "Relax--you gonna look hot in a Speedo."
— Cutscene In
Angel: "Kinzie left you that weapon."
Playa - Female 1: "Wait, this?"
Playa - Female 2: "Yes?"
Playa - Female 3: "Weapon? She didn't leave any weapon."
Playa - Male 1: "What?"
Playa - Male 2: "This thing here?"
Playa - Male 3: "Which?"
Playa - Zombie: "Sneers"
Kinzie: "The RC gun. You'll need it to take control of the Luchadores' vehicles."
Playa - Female 1: "A rocket launcher would be more practical."
Playa - Female 2: "And those vehicles will cause havoc and kill their drivers."
Playa - Female 3: "Why can't we just kill the guys?"
Playa - Male 1: "Why not just shoot them?"
Playa - Male 2: "Just give me a rifle and I'll shoot the bastards..."
Playa - Male 3: "Can't we just shoot them?"
Playa - Zombie: "Grumbles"
Kinzie: "These are supposed to look like accidents, remember?"
Playa - Female 1: "Details... The range on this gonna work alright?"
Playa - Female 2: "Then I will cause accidental havoc."
Playa - Female 3: "Can I use it from all the way up here?"
Playa - Male 1: "Will I be able use it from this high?"
Playa - Male 2: "Alright alright...so hows this thing work?"
Playa - Male 3: "Is it gonna work from up here?"
Playa - Zombie: "Roars"
Kinzie: "*non commital grunt*"
Playa - Female 1: "Reassuring, Kinzie..."
Playa - Female 2: "Trust me, Kinzie. No one will suspect a thing."
Playa - Female 3: "Whatever."
Playa - Male 1: "Right."
Playa - Male 2: "Makin' me feel better already..."
Playa - Male 3: "Wonderful."
Playa - Zombie: "Roars"
— "Mission Start"
Playa - Female 1: "Why wouldn't Killbane fight you?"
Playa - Female 2: "You are certain that Killbane won't agree to fight you?"
Playa - Female 3: "Sounds like Killbane doesn't wanna mess with you."
Playa - Male 1: "Is Killbane really that afraid of you?"
Playa - Male 2: "What's the story with you and Killbane?"
Playa - Male 3: "Is Killbane really that afraid of you?"
Playa - Zombie: "Snarls"
Angel: "He knows I'm better than him."
Playa - Female 1: "So he'll fight me instead?"
Playa - Female 2: "But he will agree to fight me?"
Playa - Female 3: "What about me?"
Playa - Male 1: "And you think he'll fight me?"
Playa - Male 2: "So that means I gotta fight him?"
Playa - Male 3: "And you think he'll fight me?"
Playa - Zombie: "Groans"
Angel: "If there's no more contenders he'll have to."
Playa - Female 1: "Or, and stay with me on this, we kill him."
Playa - Female 2: "Good. But I still think killing him would be much simpler."
Playa - Female 3: "Why don't we just kill him already?"
Playa - Male 1: "Be easier just to kill him."
Playa - Male 2: "Here's an idea; let's just kill him."
Playa - Male 3: "I say we just kill him."
Playa - Zombie: "Roars"
Angel: "Easier? Yes. But nothing worth doing is easy. When you raise Killbane's mask to the screaming crowd...you'll know you made the right choice."
Playa - Female 1: "I'm usually ok with just death..."
Playa - Female 2: "I am trusting you on this one."
Playa - Female 3: "I'll never understand you two."
Playa - Male 1: "I'll take your word for it."
Playa - Male 2: "I dunno, death's pretty shitty too."
Playa - Male 3: "If you say so."
Playa - Zombie: "Garbled"
— "Flight Conversation 1"
Announcer: "Murderbrawl! Murderbrawl! Murderbrawl!"
Zach: "That's right, folks! Get those hepatitis vaccines updated because the blood will be flying soon at Murderbrawl XXXI."
Bobby: "Right you are, Zach, and who better to announce the official line-up than the champion himself, Killbane!"
Zach: "Oh ho, you know, opponents have been arriving from all over to face their fears and meet the architect of their demise."
Bobby: "So stay tuned as the press conference will be coming to you live from the 3 Count Casino within the hour!"
Zach: "I can't wait!"
Announcer: "Murderbrawl! Murderbrawl! Murderbrawl!"
— Murderbrawl commercial (audio transcript)
Kinzie: "Pull the vehicle back before it's out of range of your controller."
Kinzie: "That's getting too far to control."
Kinzie: "The range is limited on that remote."
Kinzie: "You'll lose control if you don't slow it down."
Kinzie: "You're gonna lose the signal."
— Any time the RC vehicle is getting too far away
Kinzie: "Great, there goes the signal."
Kinzie: "Signal dropped. What a surprise."
Kinzie: "Told you to keep it close."
Kinzie: "Ugh..."
Kinzie: "Um, where'd the signal go?"
— When the RC vehicle goes out of range or is destroyed
Angel: "That Luchador heading towards that car is Mad Mangler Merle Roberts."
Playa - Female 1: "Mad Mangler? That must be one pissed off Luchador."
Playa - Female 2: "He will amuse himself by leaving a trail of twisted corpses as he drives."
Playa - Female 3: "Mad Mangler? He got anger issues or something?"
Playa - Male 1: "Mad Mangler, huh? So running over a bunch of people is probably his hobby."
Playa - Male 2: "Sounds like a ruthless fucker."
Playa - Male 3: "Mad Mangler? Do I need to be worried he'll send me back in a box?"
Playa - Zombie: "Grumbles"
Angel: "Actually, he's pretty laid back."
Playa - Female 1: "Then people can blame this on Roid Rage."
Playa - Female 2: "Good luck convincing the press of that."
Playa - Female 3: "Compared to Killbane or normal people?"
Playa - Male 1: "Fine, Roid Rage then. Work with me here, Angel..."
Playa - Male 2: "Even laid back people gotta snap sometime."
Playa - Male 3: "Throw me a bone at least..."
Playa - Zombie: "Grumbles"
— "First Luchadore"
Merle Roberts: "Let's get to the press conf... hey, what's wrong with this car?"
Playa - Female 1: "I think he might hit a few people..."
Playa - Female 2: "Let the carnage begin."
Playa - Female 3: "Dance puppets! Dance!"
Playa - Male 1: "Time to clear the sidewalks..."
Playa - Male 2: "People should start runnin'..."
Playa - Male 3: "Time to clear the sidewalks..."
Playa - Zombie: "Grunts"
Merle Roberts: "Oh God! I didn't do that!"
Merle Roberts: "This damn thing's possessed!"
Merle Roberts: "There goes my career..."
Playa - Female 1: "Uh oh, Merle's losing control..."
Playa - Female 2: "The Mad Mangler is about to retire."
Playa - Female 3: "Time for a big finish."
Playa - Male 1: "Time for an explosive finale"
Playa - Male 2: "Now for the big finish..."
Playa - Male 3: "And now the grand finale."
Playa - Zombie: "Moans"
Playa - Female 1: "Roids are bad for your health, Merle."
Playa - Female 2: "I could do this all day."
Playa - Female 3: "See what happens when you're not careful!"
Playa - Male 1: "He should've laid off the juice."
Playa - Male 2: "Roid Rage claims another victim."
Playa - Male 3: "Steroids are bad for you, kids."
Playa - Zombie: "Growls"
Playa - Female 1: "Next on the list is?"
Playa - Female 2: "Who is the next target?"
Playa - Female 3: "Who's the next to go?"
Playa - Male 1: "Who's next?"
Playa - Male 2: "Next on the list?"
Playa - Male 3: "Who's next?"
Playa - Zombie: "Mumbles"
Angel: "Christopher 'The Clubber' Johnson. He should be on his boat now."
Playa - Female 1: "We talking dance bars or seals here?"
Playa - Female 2: "I think The Clubber is about to throw his last party."
Playa - Female 3: "Clubbing what? Actually, don't answer that."
Playa - Male 1: "No wonder there's no seals around here..."
Playa - Male 2: "This guy play Cricket or something?"
Playa - Male 3: "Surrounded by baby seals?"
Playa - Zombie: "Mumbles"
— "Explain Second Target"
Playa - Female 1: "You boost signals on RC guns often?"
Playa - Female 2: "Kinzie, I am really liking this device."
Playa - Female 3: "I'm kind of enjoying this RC gun..."
Playa - Male 1: "This thing's pretty fun, Kinzie."
Playa - Male 2: "Remote control was a damn good idea, Kinzie."
Playa - Male 3: "This thing's pretty fun, Kinzie."
Playa - Zombie: "Groans"
Kinzie: "Got bored one night and threw it together."
Playa - Female 1: "Get a boyfriend... or a girlfriend."
Playa - Female 2: "You would be bored less often if you were getting laid."
Playa - Female 3: "Okay, somebody needs to get laid..."
Playa - Male 1: "You really need to get laid."
Playa - Male 2: "Get out and get laid sometime, girl."
Playa - Male 3: "You need to get laid."
Playa - Zombie: "Mumbles"
Kinzie: "Electronics are good for that too."
Playa - Female 1: "Not the same, Kinzie. Not the same..."
Playa - Female 2: "Not good enough, I think."
Playa - Female 3: "Stop talking."
Playa - Male 1: "Wow..."
Playa - Male 2: "I... yeah..."
Playa - Male 3: "Didn't hear that."
Playa - Zombie: "Groans"
— "Flight Conversation 2"
Boater: "Great, this boat's defective! I want my money back."
Boater: "They promised boating was safe!"
— "Second Boat Takeover"
Playa - Female 1: "Dangerous to party near the water like that."
Playa - Female 2: "Boats are such dangerous toys."
Playa - Female 3: "Who knew boats were that dangerous."
Playa - Male 1: "Boats... dangerous things."
Playa - Male 2: "Who knew boats were so dangerous."
Playa - Male 3: "Boats... dangerous things."
Playa - Zombie: "Grumbles"
Angel: "Not as dangerous as helicopters. Trashcan Teddy is on a sky-tour of the city."
Playa - Female 1: "You're kidding, right?"
Playa - Female 2: "Good information. You are making this easy."
Playa - Female 3: "Sky-tour?"
Playa - Male 1: "How do you know all this shit?"
Playa - Male 2: "How'd you know that?"
Playa - Male 3: "Sky-tour?"
Playa - Zombie: "Gargles"
Angel: "Know your enemy...know yourself."
— "Second One Dead"
Playa - Female 1: "Hello there, Clubber."
Playa - Female 2: "That must be the boat."
Playa - Female 3: "There."
Playa - Male 1: "There."
Playa - Male 2: "There's the boat, right?"
Playa - Male 3: "There."
Playa - Zombie: "Snarls"
Angel: "He looks different than I remember..."
Playa - Female 1: "One too many hits in the ring, maybe."
Playa - Female 2: "No one will recognize him soon."
Playa - Female 3: "Well he's like... far away..."
Playa - Male 1: "His mother won't even recognize him soon."
Playa - Male 2: "People can change... trust me."
Playa - Male 3: "His mother won't even recognize him soon."
Playa - Zombie: "Groans"
— "See Boat"
Boater: "Why isn't this thing turning off?"
Boater: "Who the hell's driving the boat?"
— "First Boat Takeover"
Angel: "That... was not his voice."
Playa - Female 1: "You said in a boat. Where is he then?"
Playa - Female 2: "Ah, well. You are sure he is here, yes?"
Playa - Female 3: "Is he even here?"
Playa - Male 1: "Well shit... You sure he's here then?"
Playa - Male 2: "I thought this was the place though?"
Playa - Male 3: "Well shit... You sure he's here then?"
Playa - Zombie: "Garbled"
Kinzie: "Hold on, let me check..."
— "Not Correct Boat"
Playa - Female 1: "This is how a torpedo does it."
Playa - Female 2: "And now for the torpedo..."
Playa - Female 3: "Time to drop the torpedo..."
Playa - Male 1: "Alright, torpedo time."
Playa - Male 2: "Time to get my torpedo on..."
Playa - Male 3: "Torpedoes away!"
Playa - Zombie: "Garbled"
Kinzie: "The boat has torpedoes?"
Playa - Female 1: "Why would the boat have... wait, I'm ending this conversation here..."
Playa - Female 2: "Who needs torpedoes? I have a boat."
Playa - Female 3: "Don't take everything so literally."
Playa - Male 1: "I'm using the boat as a torpedo, it doesn't... you know, nevermind..."
Playa - Male 2: "Not actual torpedos, I mean... Just forget I said anything."
Playa - Male 3: "What? No. I meant the boat was a torpedo because we--y'know what. Forget it."
Playa - Zombie: "Gargles"
— "Crashing First Boat"
Kinzie: "I've tracked The Clubber's cell phone. He isn't on the water, but near it."
Playa - Female 1: "There's a lot of water here, Kinzie..."
Playa - Female 2: "Where?"
Playa - Female 3: "Well that's like the same thing."
Playa - Male 1: "Any idea where?"
Playa - Male 2: "Need more detail than that, Kinzie."
Playa - Male 3: "Any idea where?"
Playa - Zombie: "Snarls"
— "Found Right Boat Guy"
Angel: "There, down at that beach party."
Playa - Female 1: "A stray boat and a ramp. Perfect."
Playa - Female 2: "It would be a shame if they got hit by a stray boat."
Playa - Female 3: "Dangerous spot. Stray boat could land on you."
Playa - Male 1: "Dangerous to have a party where a stray boat might land on you."
Playa - Male 2: "So a stray boat wouldn't be out of the question?"
Playa - Male 3: "Dangerous to have a party where a stray boat might land on you."
Playa - Zombie: "Groans"
Kinzie: "Did you say "stray boat"?"
Playa - Female 1: "What else would you call it?"
Playa - Female 2: "Haven't you heard? Steelport has a stray boat epidemic."
Playa - Female 3: "No I--shut up."
Playa - Male 1: "Stray, out of control, whatever..."
Playa - Male 2: "Yeah. Trust me."
Playa - Male 3: "It happens more than you think."
Playa - Zombie: "Roars"
— "Second Luchadore Beach"
Angel: "You'll need another boat to crash into the party."
Playa - Female 1: "Kind of obvious, but thanks."
Playa - Female 2: "I'm on it."
Playa - Female 3: "One step ahead of you."
Playa - Male 1: "Way ahead of you."
Playa - Male 2: "That one looks good."
Playa - Male 3: "Way ahead of you."
Playa - Zombie: "Gargles"
— "Grab Another Boat"
Playa - Female 1: "Whoa, Trashcan just jumped!"
Playa - Female 2: "Was that Traschan jumping out?"
Playa - Female 3: "Did he jump out?"
Playa - Male 1: "Did he just jump out?"
Playa - Male 2: "Wait, did he just bail out?"
Playa - Male 3: "Did he just jump out?"
Playa - Zombie: "Roars"
Angel: "No, that was the pilot. Trashcan must be flying now."
Playa - Female 1: "Damn... well don't get too close."
Playa - Female 2: "Don't lose him."
Playa - Female 3: "Don't lose him."
Playa - Male 1: "Don't lose him."
Playa - Male 2: "Don't let him get too far away."
Playa - Male 3: "Don't lose him."
Playa - Zombie: "Sneers"
Angel: "I won't."
— "Third Luchadore"
Angel: "Convenient. There's another helicopter you can use to crash into Trashcan's."
Playa - Female 1: "It's like someone's planning this out for me..."
Playa - Female 2: "Very convenient."
Playa - Female 3: "Gotta love coincidences."
Playa - Male 1: "Funny how that always works out..."
Playa - Male 2: "Would've been surprised if there wasn't..."
Playa - Male 3: "Someone must be looking out for me."
Playa - Zombie: "Snarls"
— "Controlling Helicopter"
Interrogation: "What do you want from me, spirit?!"
Interrogation: "Great, now my chopper is haunted, too."
— "Heli Takeover"
Playa - Female 1: "They teach helicopter piloting to all Luchadores?"
Playa - Female 2: "You pilot well, Angel. You must fly quite often."
Playa - Female 3: "I didn't know you could fly, Angel."
Playa - Male 1: "So where'd you learn to fly, Angel?"
Playa - Male 2: "Where'd you learn to handle a chopper, Angel?"
Playa - Male 3: "How'd you learn to fly, Angel?"
Playa - Zombie: "Babbles"
Angel: "I needed to find new ways to challenge and train myself."
Playa - Female 1: "And flying a chopper helps this how?"
Playa - Female 2: "How does flying challenge you?"
Playa - Female 3: "How does flying fit into wrestling?"
Playa - Male 1: "Don't see how flying a chopper helps with that."
Playa - Male 2: "Flying a chopper helps with training?"
Playa - Male 3: "Don't see how one helps with the other."
Playa - Zombie: "Growls"
Angel: "It doesn't. But I had to learn so I could practice jumping out."
Playa - Female 1: "There's the Angel I know."
Playa - Female 2: "That makes sense."
Playa - Female 3: "How does... y'know what, forget it."
Playa - Male 1: "Now that makes sense..."
Playa - Male 2: "Makes sense..."
Playa - Male 3: "...right..."
Playa - Zombie: "Grunts"
— "Flight Conversation 3"
Playa - Female 1: "Teddy's headed for the trash now. Next?"
Playa - Female 2: "This has been a good day. We have more, yes?"
Playa - Female 3: "Anyone else still left?"
Playa - Male 1: "That's done. There any more?"
Playa - Male 2: "There goes Teddy..."
Playa - Male 3: "That's done. There any more?"
Playa - Zombie: "Sneers"
Angel: "I've saved the worst for last...El Presidente."
Playa - Female 1: "Why's he the worst?"
Playa - Female 2: "Good, good. What's the complication?"
Playa - Female 3: "What's so bad about him?"
Playa - Male 1: "What's the problem?"
Playa - Male 2: "Sounds pretty important."
Playa - Male 3: "Why?"
Playa - Zombie: "Moans"
Angel: "He's reached out to STAG for protection...He's afraid that Kilbane will try to kill him before the match."
Playa - Female 1: "He's with STAG... STAG has tanks... I don't see a problem here."
Playa - Female 2: "If Kinzie's device can control a tank, STAG will commit a few more atrocities."
Playa - Female 3: "STAG's protection is about to turn on him."
Playa - Male 1: "He's half right...time to take over a tank: I think STAG's about to cause an accident."
Playa - Male 2: "Killbane won't get the chance."
Playa - Male 3: "He's half right...time to take over a tank: I think STAG's about to cause an accident."
Playa - Zombie: "Grunts"
— "Third One Dead"
Playa - Female 1: "I told you STAG has tanks."
Playa - Female 2: "Excellent. Plenty of tanks to choose from."
Playa - Male 1: "That's... a lot of tanks."
Playa - Male 2: "Perfect... tanks."
Playa - Male 3: "Good god..."
Playa - Zombie: "Grunts"
— "Fourth Luchadore"
Playa - Female 1: "Now to piss off the big guy..."
Playa - Female 2: "It is time for Killbane and I to have a little chat."
Playa - Female 3: "We're just getting started..."
Playa - Male 1: "Time to pick a fight..."
Playa - Male 2: "Time to say hi to Killbane..."
Playa - Male 3: "Time to pick a fight..."
Playa - Zombie: "Babbles"
— "Fourth One Dead"
Angel: "There! He's getting in a car."
Playa - Female 1: "Because that'll stop a tank..."
Playa - Female 2: "Watch closely. El Presidente is about to be assassinated."
Playa - Female 3: "Easy target. We can take care of this."
Playa - Male 1: "Don't worry...he won't get far."
Playa - Male 2: "Like that's gonna help his ass."
Playa - Male 3: "He won't go far."
Playa - Zombie: "Growls"
— "Last Target Entering Car"
STAG: "Nobody gave the order to roll out!"
STAG: "Sir, there's nobody at the controls of that thing."
STAG: "Then it's gone rogue..."
STAG: "Sir...?"
STAG: "All units, destroy that tank!"
— "STAG Tank Chatter Start"
STAG: "We need more firepower on it!"
STAG: "We stop it before we lose any more men!"
STAG: "It has a mind of it's own!"
STAG: "Why is it after us?!"
— "STAG Tank Radio Chatter"
Killbane: "Ladies and gentlemen...the Stilwater Butcher has graced us with their presence."
Playa: "You wanna fight the best, you fight me."
Killbane: "The best? The best is beating Sway the Spider-God in a Tijuana Scaffold Match. The best is defending the world title 13 times in one night. The best is winning a last man standing match with two broken legs...Trust me little Icarus: you're flying too close to the sun."
Playa: "Oh my God, quit being a bitch and put your mask up."
Killbane: "If you wanna be broken by The Walking Apocalypse I will gladly oblige you."
— "cutscene Out"
Air Steelport
Viola: "There's probably an easier way to do this!"
Playa: "No doubt!"
Air Steelport intro
Viola DeWynter and Playa, before the latter dives onto the STAG cargo plane.
Playa - Male 1: "Kinzie, there been any chatter from STAG?"
Kinzie Kensington: "An air convoy is flying into Steelport."
Playa - Male 1: "Then call Viola and tell her to meet me at the airport. I'll need her jet."
— Pre-mission phone call (Male 1)
Playa - Male 2: "How's my favorite computer..."
Kinzie Kensington: "Don't finish that sentence if you want to hear the information I have."
Playa - Male 2: "I was gonna say "girl"."
Kinzie Kensington: "Sure you were."
Playa - Male 2: "So what'd you find out?"
Kinzie Kensington: "That a shipment of equipment for STAG is headed towards Steelport."
Playa - Male 2: "Good, let's take it. What pier's it arriving at?"
Kinzie Kensington: "It's coming in by cargo plane, with an escort of VTOLs."
Playa - Male 2: "Well shit. They'll have the airport locked down tight when it lands."
Kinzie Kensington: "Scrap the information then?"
Playa - Male 2: "Hell no. Just cause we can't hit it on the ground doesn't mean we can't hit it. Tell Viola to meet me at the airport."
— Pre-mission phone call (Male 2)
Kinzie Kensington: "Do you know what a flock of birds is?"
Playa - Male 3: "A... bunch of... birds?"
Kinzie Kensington: "A convoy of planes. All accompanying a STAG cargo plane."
Playa - Male 3: "Next time, start with that explanation."
Kinzie Kensington: "They're scheduled to enter steelport airspace not long from now. Probably bringing in new weapons and equipment for STAG."
Playa - Male 3: "Doubt we could get to them before they land. We'll have to hit them on the ground."
Kinzie Kensington: "Viola said you could use the Syndicate's jet if you need to."
Playa - Male 3: "Well that opens up a whole new set of possibilities..."
Kinzie Kensington: "Want me to send their location?"
Playa - Male 3: "Send it to Viola and tell her to get the plane ready."
— Pre-mission phone call (Male 3)
Playa - Female 1: "So what's next, Kinzie?"
Kinzie Kensington: "Why do you assume I have something?"
Playa - Female 1: "Because you're... dedicated to finding information."
Kinzie Kensington: "STAG cargo plane being escorted into Steelport airspace."
Playa - Female 1: "Now that's something I can work with."
Kinzie Kensington: "You're welcome..."
Playa - Female 1: "Have Viola get her plane ready. We'll need it."
— Pre-mission phone call (Female 1)
Playa - Female 2: "Kinzie, you been keeping tabs on STAG?"
Kinzie Kensington: "Among other things."
Playa - Female 2: "Anything we can use?"
Kinzie Kensington: "There's a cargo plane flying in, escorted by some of their VTOLs."
Playa - Female 2: "Think you can tell Viola to get to the airport?"
Kinzie Kensington: "Why? So she can blow it out of the sky for you?"
Playa - Female 2: "No, so she can fly me up there so I can take STAG's plane in the air."
Kinzie Kensington: "I don't... oh, I hadn't considered that. Try not to die."
— Pre-mission phone call (Female 2)
Kinzie Kensington: "You're early."
Playa - Female 3: "Sorry?"
Kinzie Kensington: "I was going to call you with some information on a STAG aircraft convoy heading towards Steelport."
Playa - Female 3: "Why'd you wait?"
Kinzie Kensington: "Was trying to figure out how to get the plane down without crashing it."
Playa - Female 3: "And you can't do that?"
Kinzie Kensington: "No. I can't remotly hijack a military plane and safely land it using a laptop. Also, I can't catch a bullet with my teeth, or drink a gallon of milk in an hour."
Playa - Female 3: "Then I'll just have to get on the plane."
Kinzie Kensington: "I'll call Viola, you can use her plane..."
Playa - Female 3: "Sounds good."
— Pre-mission phone call (Female 3)
Kinzie Kensington: "What do you two need?"
Playa - Zombie: "Garbled"
Kinzie Kensington: "I thought you'd be with Viola by now. She mentioned something about a STAG air-convoy."
Playa - Zombie: "Groans"
Kinzie Kensington: "Skyjack it...I thought that was obvious."
Playa - Zombie: "Grunts"
Kinzie Kensington: "Viola has her own jet. Would you like me to tell her to get it fueled and ready?"
Playa - Zombie: "Snarls"
Kinzie Kensington: "Of course I'm useful."
— Pre-mission phone call (Zombie)
Viola: "There's probably an easier way to do this!"
Playa: "No doubt!"
Trooper: "I heard gunfire, this way!"
— "cutscene In"
Playa - Female 1: "The pilots have the door locked."
Playa - Female 2: "They have locked the cockpit from the inside."
Playa - Female 3: "They locked the door from the inside."
Playa - Male 1: "Damn door's locked from the inside."
Playa - Male 2: "The pilots got this shit locked tight."
Playa - Male 3: "Bloody door's locked from the inside."
Playa - Zombie: "Grumbles"
Viola DeWynter: "You're in a supply plane for the military. There has to be something you can use."
— "Cockpit Door"
Viola DeWynter: "How guarded is the cargo?"
Playa - Female 1: "The gunfire isn't tipping you off?"
Playa - Female 2: "I won't be getting lonely."
Playa - Female 3: "It's STAG. What do you think?"
Playa - Male 1: "Well, STAG doesn't skimp on people."
Playa - Male 2: "Oh you know, small army..."
Playa - Male 3: "STAG doesn't skimp on security."
Playa - Zombie: "Garbled"
Viola DeWynter: "Will there be any problems getting to the cockpit?"
Playa - Female 1: "Nothing a few bullets can't handle."
Playa - Female 2: "A few inconveniences, perhaps. Nothing serious."
Playa - Female 3: "I don't know... quit asking so many questions!"
Playa - Male 1: "Viola, little busy here..."
Playa - Male 2: "Can I get back to you on that?"
Playa - Male 3: "There will be if you don't keep quiet."
Playa - Zombie: "Grunts"
— "Plane Combat"
Viola DeWynter: "Almost forgot."
Playa - Female 1: "Is it important?"
Playa - Female 2: "Is there something on your mind?"
Playa - Female 3: "...yeah?"
Playa - Male 1: "Yeah?"
Playa - Male 2: "Is it important?"
Playa - Male 3: "Yeah?"
Playa - Zombie: "Grumbles"
Viola DeWynter: "Try to actually stay IN the plane for once."
Playa - Female 1: "So that's a no, then."
Playa - Female 2: "I will remember that."
Playa - Female 3: "That's clever."
Playa - Male 1: "Oh ha ha..."
Playa - Male 2: "*sigh*"
Playa - Male 3: "That's hilarious."
Playa - Zombie: "Growls"
— "Falling Out is Bad"
Playa - Female 1: "This thing won't get the job done."
Playa - Female 2: "This is not working."
Playa - Female 3: "Well, that won't open it."
Playa - Male 1: "Well, this isn't opening it."
Playa - Male 2: "Don't think this'll work..."
Playa - Male 3: "This isn't working."
Playa - Zombie: "Grumbles"
Viola DeWynter: "There anything else to try?"
— "Not Working on Door 1"
Playa - Female 1: "I don't even know what this is."
Playa - Female 2: "Hmm. I need something more powerful."
Playa - Female 3: "Not this one either."
Playa - Male 1: "Not this either."
Playa - Male 2: "This ain't gettin' it done..."
Playa - Male 3: "Not this either."
Playa - Zombie: "Moans"
Viola DeWynter: "Well, keep looking."
— "Not Working on Door 2"
Playa - Female 1: "Here we go, some high-tech weapon thing."
Playa - Female 2: "I have not seen technology like this before. It might work."
Playa - Female 3: "This might have enough power to blast through the door..."
Playa - Male 1: "Found this strange piece of tech. Might be able to blast through the door with it."
Playa - Male 2: "Alright, got some high-tech gun thing here."
Playa - Male 3: "Some sort of gun here... Might be able to blast open the door."
Playa - Zombie: "Mumbles"
Viola DeWynter: "Then use it so we can land these things already."
— "Sonic Gun"
Playa - Female 1: "Am I doing something wrong here?"
Playa - Female 2: "Surely this device has the power..."
Playa - Female 3: "Yeah, this should work..."
Playa - Male 1: "Seems like this should work..."
Playa - Male 2: "Why the hell isn't this working?"
Playa - Male 3: "Seems like this should work..."
Playa - Zombie: "Grunts"
Viola DeWynter: "You getting close enough?"
— "Not Close Enough"
Playa - Female 1: "Think maybe they know I'm here..."
Playa - Female 2: "That could have gone better."
Playa - Female 3: "So much for the element of surprise."
Playa - Male 1: "So much for surprise."
Playa - Male 2: "Guess stealth's out..."
Playa - Male 3: "So much for the element of surprise."
Playa - Zombie: "Groans"
Viola DeWynter: "At least you're inside."
— "Mission Start"
Playa - Female 1: "Not cool, plane!"
Playa - Female 2: "That... could be a problem."
Playa - Female 3: "Shit. That wasn't supposed to happen."
Playa - Male 1: "Oops."
Playa - Male 2: "Hey...Viola"
Playa - Male 3: "Bollocks"
Playa - Zombie: "Snarls"
Viola DeWynter: "Oh god, what did you do..."
Playa - Female 1: "The cockpit's kinda... gone."
Playa - Female 2: "The cockpit is now gone. I need a new plan..."
Playa - Female 3: "The uh... Cockpit's gone. Plan B!"
Playa - Male 1: "Cockpit's gone, going to plan B."
Playa - Male 2: "The cockpit is, uh...gone."
Playa - Male 3: "Cockpit's gone, going to plan B."
Playa - Zombie: "Sneers"
Viola DeWynter: "Gone? What do you mean gone?"
— "Cockpit Gone"
Playa - Female 1: "This thing's great."
Playa - Female 2: "This is a very useful device."
Playa - Male 1: "This thing clears a nice path."
Playa - Male 2: "Out of the way!"
Playa - Zombie: "Moans"
— "Blast Container"
Playa - Female 1: "Fuuuuck!"
Playa - Female 2: "Very impressive!"
Playa - Female 3: "Oh my god... Oh. My. God."
Playa - Male 1: "Holy shit!"
Playa - Male 2: "OH SHIT!"
Playa - Male 3: "My god..."
Playa - Zombie: "Babbles"
— "Gooing People"
Playa - Female 1: "I hate turbulence..."
Playa - Female 2: "I can't blame the pilot this time."
Playa - Male 1: "Dammit, I hate walking in these planes..."
Playa - Male 2: "Quit rockin' the plane."
Playa - Zombie: "Snarls"
— "Damn"
Playa - Female 1: "I'm gonna regret this..."
Playa - Female 2: "Not my best plan..."
Playa - Female 3: "Oh God..."
Playa - Male 1: "Oh God..."
Playa - Male 2: "Oh not again..."
Playa - Male 3: "Oh shit."
Playa - Zombie: "Grunts"
— "Beginning of Tank"
Playa - Female 1: "Quit shooting my tank."
Playa - Female 2: "I'm, taking a lot of damage."
Playa - Female 3: "The tank's not looking so hot..."
Playa - Male 1: "Tank's taking a beating."
Playa - Male 2: "Hope this thing holds up..."
Playa - Male 3: "Tank's taking a beating."
Playa - Zombie: "Growls"
Playa - Female 1: "Hold together, baby."
Playa - Female 2: "They are determined to destroy this tank."
Playa - Female 3: "Not now, dammit!"
Playa - Male 1: "This could be going better..."
Playa - Male 2: "Keep together, baby..."
Playa - Male 3: "Really not good..."
Playa - Zombie: "Grunts"
Playa - Female 1: "Ok, getting worried..."
Playa - Female 2: "I don't think this tank can take much more."
Playa - Female 3: "Can't SOMETHING go according to plan?"
Playa - Male 1: "Ok, now I'm a little worried."
Playa - Male 2: "Alright, little worried..."
Playa - Male 3: "Hold together, girl..."
Playa - Zombie: "Growls"
— "Tank Health"
Playa - Female 1: "Maybe not my best idea."
Playa - Female 2: "Shaundi will think I made this up."
Playa - Female 3: "Now that's some serious firepower."
Playa - Male 1: "Seemed like a good idea at the time."
Playa - Male 2: "Maybe this wasn't the best idea..."
Playa - Male 3: "Seemed like a good idea at the time."
Playa - Zombie: "Groans"
Playa - Female 1': "I don't have insurance on this thing."
Playa - Female 2: "Perhaps they want their tank back."
Playa - Female 3: "I love it when a plan comes together."
Playa - Male 1: "Hey, watch the paint..."
Playa - Male 2: "Why you guys gotta fuck with me?"
Playa - Male 3: "Scuse me."
Playa - Zombie: "Moans"
Playa - Female 1: "Next time I'll take a parachute..."
Playa - Female 2: "Steelport looks good from the air."
Playa - Female 3: "Who needs a parachute?"
Playa - Male 1: "Parachutes are overrated..."
Playa - Male 2: "Fuck parachutes..."
Playa - Male 3: "It's not the fall I'm worried about..."
Playa - Zombie: "Gargles"
— "Generic Tank"
Playa - Female 1: "I'm falling through the air... again..."
Playa - Female 2: "At least I have a tank this time."
Playa - Female 3: "Here we we go again..."
Playa - Male 1: "Why does this shit always happen to me..."
Playa - Male 2: "Fuck me..."
Playa - Male 3: "How does this keep happening?!"
Playa - Zombie: "Sneers"
— "Falling Yet"
Playa - Female 1: "You were not clear for a flyby!"
Playa - Female 2: "That was too close."
Playa - Female 3: "Hope that doesn't happen again."
Playa - Male 1: "Shit that was close."
Playa - Male 2: "They almost fuckin' hit me!"
Playa - Male 3: "Little too close..."
Playa - Zombie: "Sneers"
— "VTOL Hit"
Playa - Female 1: "How long's it take to hit ground?"
Playa - Female 2: "UFO watchers will love this."
Playa - Female 3: "Why haven't I tried this before?"
Playa - Male 1: "You'd think this thing would fall faster."
Playa - Male 2: "That ground even gettin' closer?"
Playa - Male 3: "Just a nice relaxing day..."
Playa - Zombie: "Groans"
Playa - Female 1: "Yep... still falling..."
Playa - Female 2: "I think people would pay to do this."
Playa - Female 3: "Aaaand I'm still falling..."
Playa - Male 1: "It never ends..."
Playa - Male 2: "Where do they get these things?"
Playa - Male 3: "It never ends..."
Playa - Zombie: "Grunts"
— "Generic Tank"
Playa - Female 1: "I shouldn't have eaten first..."
Playa - Female 2: "I am sitting duck in here!"
Playa - Female 3: "This is some messed up shit."
Playa - Male 1: "This is a fucked up ride."
Playa - Male 2: "Not a fan of this shit..."
Playa - Male 3: "This is one fucked up ride."
Playa - Zombie: "Garbled"
— "VTOL Hit"
Playa - Female 1: "I hope Viola is recording this shit."
Playa - Female 2: "I did not think I was that high up..."
Playa - Female 3: "Pierce is gonna be jealous."
Playa - Male 1: "Pierce'll be pissed he missed this."
Playa - Male 2: "Pierce ain't gonna believe this shit."
Playa - Male 3: "And me without my camera..."
Playa - Zombie: "Babbles"
— "Generic Tank"
Playa - Female 1: "Great place for a plane!"
Playa - Female 2: "An airplane. That will work nicely."
Playa - Female 3: "Nothing wrong with a little skyjacking."
Playa - Male 1: "Looks like I'm stealing a plane after all."
Playa - Male 2: "Alright, I'll land in the plane..."
Playa - Male 3: "How convenient..."
Playa - Zombie: "Growls"
— "Steal Plane"
Playa - Female 1: "On to plan C."
Playa - Female 2: "I should get out while I can."
Playa - Female 3: "Enough of this shit."
Playa - Male 1: "Time to get the hell out of here..."
Playa - Male 2: "Time to bail."
Playa - Male 3: "Time to bail!"
Playa - Zombie: "Moans"
— "Exit the Tank"
Playa - Female 1: "Or I could be wrong..."
Playa - Female 2: "Tanks, yes, tanks are good too."
Playa - Male 1: "Or maybe I'll stick to tanks..."
Playa - Male 2: "Well, there goes that..."
Playa - Male 3: "Just my luck."
Playa - Zombie: "Babbles"
— "Plane Blows Up"
Playa - Female 1: "Here goes nothing!"
Playa - Female 2: "Shame about the plane."
Playa - Female 3: "I'm going for it!"
Playa - Male 1: "Fuck it..."
Playa - Male 2: "WHOOOOOO!"
Playa - Male 3: "Fuck it..."
Playa - Zombie: "Snarls"
— "Dive Through Plane Wreck"
Playa - Female 1: "Fuck right!"
Playa - Female 2: "Nice day for it."
Playa - Female 3: "WOHOOOO!"
Playa - Male 1: "WHOOOO!"
Playa - Male 2: "Aw yeah, you see that shit!"
Playa - Male 3: "WHOOOO!"
Playa - Zombie: "Sneers"
— "While Skydiving"
Playa - Female 1: "I love it when plan B comes together."
Playa - Female 2: "Pierce is going to be so jealous."
Playa - Female 3: "I'm like a badass action hero!"
Playa - Male 1: "They should use this in a movie..."
Playa - Male 2: "I feel like I've been here before..."
Playa - Male 3: "The stop is what I'm worried about."
Playa - Zombie: "Sneers"
Playa - Female 1: "So what's the in-flight movie?"
Playa - Female 2: "These tanks are not very comfortable."
Playa - Female 3: "This is better than regular skydiving."
Playa - Male 1: "This thing needs a stewardess."
Playa - Male 2: "Why's this shit always happening to me..."
Playa - Male 3: "I could use a stewardess or three..."
Playa - Zombie: "Sneers"
— "Generic Tank"
Airborne Assault
Laura: "Hello..."
Playa: "Glad you could make it."
Laura: "Ya know a nice robin egg blue would really spruce this place up..."
Shaundi: "I was thinking more of an avocado..."
Laura: "Oooo..."
Playa: "Hey, can we, ya know, talk about the Loa Dust already?"
Laura: "Right, sorry."
Laura: "That stuff is very sophisticated...I won't bore you with all the details like acetone and trichloroethane, but there is definitely some very good pot in there."
Playa: "As long as we can make the shit, it could have embalming fluid in it for all I care..."
Laura: "Making it won't be a problem, I'll give the recipe to Shaundi."
Playa: "Now all we gotta do is stop those fuckers from producing any more."
Shaundi: "Well seeing as they're turning out so much product they'd need a-oh my god I'm an idiot."
Playa: "What's up?"
Shaundi: "I...in college I dated this guy who would sell for the Sons, and he mentioned that they used to grow all their shit on a farm off campus."
Playa: "And this is coming up for the first time, why?"
Shaundi: "I forgot?"
Playa: "You're right, you are an idiot..."
Shaundi: "Hey!"
Playa: "Thanks for your help Laura"
Playa (Male 2): "Thanks for your help, Laura."
Shaundi: "Where are you going?"
Playa: "I got a farm to burn down."
Shaundi: "We can't just charge into that place."
Laura: "You don't have to."
Playa: "Whaddya mean?"
Laura: "Tobias is outside in the car, he's got a pilot's license, why don't you just have him fly you over the farm?"
Playa: "You gotta be kidding me."
Tobias walks in
Tobias: "Does it look I'm joking?"
— "Life On The Farm" cutscene
Tobias: "I gotta tell ya, destroying this much product just feels wrong."
Playa (Male Voice 1): "Tobias, these assholes are stealin' your business, you think they're givin' you any professional courtesy?"
Playa (Male Voice 2): "Look on the bright side, at least you and Laura get to corner the market..."
Playa (Male Voice 3): "Trust me, you'll get over it..."
Playa (Female Voice 1): "Tobias, these guys wouldn't think twice about killing you and Laura...trust me, it's better this way..."
Playa (Female Voice 2): "You really havea dealer code of ethics? These guys want you dead..."
Playa (Female Voice 3): "Seeing as these guys want me dead, I don't really care about professional courtesy..."
Tobias: "I never thought of it that way...say Laura and I's anniversary is comin' up you got any ideas?"
Playa (Male Voice 1): "You're asking the wrong guy..I'd say either a QP or an Aisha CD."
Playa (Male Voice 2): "Knowing Laura I'd say either a baking pan or an automatic shotgun..."
Playa (Male Voice 3): "If I were you I'd start looking for a needle sterilization kit...or a cookbook."
Playa (Female Voice 1): "Take her on vacation to Columbia...do a lotta coke..."
Playa (Female Voice 2): "Give her something romantic...massage oil, some bath beads, maybe throw in a mirror and a razor blade..."
Playa (Female Voice 3): "You know what women love? Diamonds and pot. Stick with that and you'll be fine..."
Tobias: "Looks like some of the Samedi are tryin' to make a run for it..."
Playa (Male Voice 1): "Take me in closer, I'll take those assholes out..."
Playa (Male Voice 2): "They're not gonna get very far...fly me in close..."
Playa (Male Voice 3): "You get me in close and those assholes aren't goin' anywhere..."
Playa (Female Voice 1): "Fly me in close, I can take 'em out..."
Playa (Female Voice 2): "Not for long -- bring us in low..."
Playa (Female Voice 3): "You get me close enough and I can take care of 'em..."
— After destroying all of the equipment
Tobias: "BURN MOTHER FUCKER!"
Tobias: "We should do this every weekend..."
Tobias: "I love my job..."
Tobias: "crazed laughter"
Tobias: "This reminds me of Laura and I's first date..."
Tobias: "They hate it when you do that..."
Tobias: "God I love your work..."
Tobias: "YOU WANNA FUCK WITH US!"
Tobias: "YOU'RE ALL COGS IN THE MACHINE!"
— After attacking
Tobias: "You mind making sure we don't crash?"
Tobias: "It's a little hard to fly this thing when it's filled with FUCKING BULLETS!"
Tobias: "This isn't going too well..."
Tobias: "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?"
Tobias: "QUIT FUCKING AROUND AND KILL THEM!"
Tobias: "This really could be going better..."
— After taking damage
The General and Mr. Sunshine barge into the music store.
Mr. Sunshine: "Everybody get out!"
They just continue listening to music.
The General: "Perhaps they did not understand you..."
Mr. Sunshine kills a customer with his machete, causing everyone to run out, except Veteran Child.
Veteran Child: "What's, uh, what's up guys?"
The General: "The Saints razed my farm."
Veteran Child: "That's, uh, that's some shitty luck."
The General: "A helicopter mounted machine gun has nothing to do with luck."
Veteran Child: "Well how- Yo, can you cut that shit out? You're freakin' me out. How did they find out about the farm?"
The General: "Why don't you tell me..."
Veteran Child: "I don't know wh-"
The General: "Stop lying."
Veteran Child: "Dude, I said I don-"
Mr. Sunshine: "And he said, "Stop. Lying.""
Veteran Child: "I'm tellin' you the truth man, I don't know how they found out..."
The General: "Then you are not very useful are you?"
Veteran Child: "I don't know how they found out, but I got some ideas..."
The General: "Enlighten me..."
Veteran Child: "I used to date this bitch Shaundi...and there's a chance, and I mean a small fuckin' chance...that I might have gotten stoned and told her about the farm."
The General: "Where is this Shaundi?"
Veteran Child: "Word is she rolls with the Saints now..."
The General: "Let him go..."
The General: "Veteran Child, you will go kill this Shaundi...if you fail to do this Mr. Sunshine will burn you alive. Does this sound fair?"
Veteran Child: "Uh-"
The General: "Excellent...let's be on our way."
— "Music Lovers" cutscene
Aisha
Pierce: "How long were you rolling with Gat, anyway?"
Protagonist Male 1: "Long time. He was there when I first joined the Saints."
Protagonist Male 2: "Since Julius was running shit, back when I first joined up."
Protagonist Male 3: "Long. Met him when I first became a Saint."
Protagonist Female 1: "Since I joined the Saints. Been a while now."
Protagonist Female 2: "From the beginning. He was there when I joined."
Protagonist Female 3: "A while. He was around when I first joined the Saints."
Protagonist Zombie: "Snarls"
Pierce: "Shit, what was he like back then?"
Protagonist Male 1: "He mellowed with age...until Aisha died, then he was fucking pissed."
Protagonist Male 2: "Badass. He took a shotgun to the knee and kept walking..."
Protagonist Male 3: "Measured. Controlled... That all changed when Aisha died."
Protagonist Female 1: "Pretty much the same. He just had a shittier haircut."
Protagonist Female 2: "There was no one like Johnny. And then Aisha died. After that he was.... different."
Protagonist Female 3: "Fucking. Crazy. And we all loved him for it."
Protagonist Zombie: "Growls"
— Pierce and Playa discussing Johnny on the way to Rim Jobs in the mission Steelport Here I Am
Aisha's Favor
Johnny Gat: "Take a seat, man."
Johnny Gat: "So you're Julius' new boy huh? You don't look like much. Then again, I don't look like I have an eight inch cock, so I guess we're both full of surprises."
Johnny Gat: "The Vice Kings are named after one guy: Benjamin King. That shit don't happen unless you're a professional or a bad ass, and in King's case, he's both."
Johnny Gat: "Hold up, I gotta take this. Aisha, what a pleasant fucking surprise. Whoa, slow down. Okay that's not slower, that's louder. Shit, where's she headed? Don't worry, I got this."
Dex: "What's up?"
Johnny Gat: "Some mother fucker's grabbed Aisha's sister right off the street."
Dex: "Shit man, that's the sixth girl this month. We know who's doing this?"
Johnny Gat: "Yeah, the Vice Kings."
Dex: "No way man, kidnapping ain't King's style."
Johnny Gat: "Maybe that slut Tanya is goin' behind King's back, don't know, don't fuckin' care."
Gat turn to The Protagonist
Johnny Gat: "Aisha said they were drivin' a yellow sedan. Tail those bitches back to wherever they go and get those girls back."
Woman Troubles full CUTSCENES 0204
— "Woman Troubles" cutscene
Aisha's sister
Aisha: "My sister was kidnapped!"
Johnny Gat: "And I brought her back didn't I?"
Aisha: "No, he did."
Johnny Gat: "Bullshit, I told him to do it. No offense."
— During the mission "...To Kingdom Come"
All Hands on Deck
Shaundi: "What's the plan?"
Playa - Female 1: "I'm gonna check on Kinzie, you're going to secure the doors."
Playa - Female 2: "You and Johnny secure the doors, I'm checking on Kinzie..."
Playa - Female 3: "I'll check on Kinzie, you two secure the room.."
Playa - Male 1: "You and Gat secure the doors while I check on Kinzie."
Playa - Male 2: "Secure the doors, I'm going to check on Kinzie."
Playa - Male 3: "Secure the room. I'm checking on Kinzie..."
Nolan North: "You and Gat secure the doors while I check on Kinzie."
— "Mission Start"
Johnny Gat: "Quit fucking around and get in here!"
— "Boss"
Playa - Female 1: "That wasn't a bad "fuck you" to Zinyak. Now let's get outta here and find Kinzie."
Playa - Female 2: "That wasn't a bad "fuck you" to Zinyak. Now let's get out of here and find Kinzie."
Playa - Female 3: "That wasn't a bad "fuck you" to Zinyak. Now let's get outta here and find Kinzie."
Playa - Male 1: "That wasn't a bad "fuck you" to Zinyak. Now let's get out of here and find Kinzie."
Playa - Male 2: "That wasn't a bad "fuck you" to Zinyak. Now let's get outta here and find Kinzie."
Playa - Male 3: "That wasn't a bad "fuck you" to Zinyak. Now let's get out of here and find Kinzie."
Nolan North: "That wasn't a bad "fuck you" to Zinyak. Now let's get outta here and find Kinzie."
— "Boss Freed"
Playa: "Shaundi what the fuck are you doing, they got Kinzie!"
Shaundi: "Boss, the Zin are here!"
Playa: "What?"
Shaundi: "We were set up!"
Shaundi: "I got out of the simulation, Pierce and King were out cold, the proximity alarm is screaming, and Asha, Miller, and the Vice President are gone."
Playa: "They kidnapped Keith David!?"
Gat: "And left us sleeping so we'd get picked up by Zinyak."
Playa: "Too bad for them we're awake."
— All Hands on Deck opening cutscene
Playa: "GODDAMN IT!"
Pierce: "What happened?"
Shaundi: "MI-6 fucked us."
Pierce: "I knew it! Asha had it out for me since jump. She talked shit in Pakistan...She sucker punched me here-"
Playa: "I can't believe Miller had me fooled...to think I actually APOLOGIZED..."
Shaundi: "He's probably been working this angle for a while...hell, he might have even been the one who tipped off Zinyak about Johnny."
Gat: "Doubt it."
Narrator: "Dante said that the lowest circle of hell was reserved for betrayers, but it's important to remember that it's the storyteller who decides who the hero is, not morality. But while philosophers will spend years debating the ethics of "The Kinzie Gambit", the Saints had a less charitable view..."
Playa: "Keith David is a dead man."
— All Hands on Deck closing cutscene
Playa - Female 1: "Kinzie... we're not leaving you behind."
Playa - Female 2: "We're not going to let you down, Kinzie."
Playa - Female 3: "Be strong honey... we're coming for you."
Playa - Male 1: "We'll get you back, Kinzie, just hang on."
Playa - Male 2: "We're gonna get you back Kinzie... promise."
Playa - Male 3: "We'll save you Kinize. I promise."
Nolan North: "We'll get you back, Kinzie, just hang on."
— "Check Kinzie"
Playa: "Helluva welcome back, huh, Johnny?"
Johnny Gat: "Fuck, were you thinking I wanted to go to Hawaii or something? I live for this shit."
— "Gun Convo"
Playa - Female 1: "Protect Kinzie!"
Playa - Female 2: "They keep coming!"
Playa - Female 3: "Hold the line!"
Playa - Male 1: "Keep on 'em!"
Playa - Male 2: "Don't let 'em get to Kinzie!"
Playa - Male 3: "Come on' you fuckers!"
Nolan North: "Keep on 'em!"
Shaundi: "Don't let them get in this room!"
Johnny Gat: "Die, you sons-a-bitches!"
— "Nemo Fight"
Johnny Gat: "Let's clear out the lower decks!"
Shaundi: "We have to hold the room!"
Johnny Gat: "Fuck that. I'm not waiting for them to come to me."
— "Nemo Lower Decks"
Johnny Gat: "We're clear!"
Playa: "Shaundi, stay with Kinzie. Gat, you're with me."
Shaundi: "You got it."
— "Nemo Fight Over"
Playa: "Is Kinzie okay?"
Shaundi: "Everyone's fine. The Zin grabbed me and..."
Johnny Gat: "CID said something about heat signatures?"
— "Zin Killed"
Johnny Gat: "We got bombs over here."
Playa: "Bombs?"
Johnny Gat: "Yeah. And they're set to blow. You thinking what I'm thinking?"
Playa - Female 1: "No hacking. No stealth. Just explosions."
Playa - Female 2: "This plan writes itself..."
Playa - Female 3: "Xenocide followed by a lemon shake up? Oh yeah."
Playa - Male 1: "Shaundi, go back to Kinzie and the rest. Gat, let's go blow up a spaceship."
Playa - Male 2: "Shaundi... watch over Kinzie, Gat and I have some shit to blow up."
Playa - Male 3: "Keep an eye on Kinzie, Shaundi... Johnny and I are about to do something really stupid."
Nolan North: "Shaundi... Shaundi, go back to Kinzie and the rest. Gat, let's go blow up a spaceship."
— "Cargo Check"
Johnny Gat: "You got a specific thing you wanna blow up or just shit in general?"
Playa: "Kinzie, what's the weakest point on the Zin ship?"
Johnny Gat: "Boss, Kinzie's..."
Playa - Female 1: "Fuck! I..."
Playa - Female 2: "Fuck! I..."
Playa - Female 3: "Fuck! I..."
Playa - Male 1: "Fuck! I..."
Playa - Male 2: "Fuck! I forgot."
Playa - Male 3: "Fuck! I..."
Nolan North: "Fuck! I..."
Johnny Gat: "Look, we'll just find the biggest, glowingest thing on the ship and stick the bombs to that."
— "Rid of Bombs"
Johnny Gat: "These Zin sure do make a good argument for murdering them."
Playa - Female 1: "When I'm through with Zinyak he's gonna be begging for me to kill him."
Playa - Female 2: "Absolutley... that's why I'm planning on taking my time when I get to Zinyak...."
Playa - Female 3: "Zinyak's gonna answer for what he's done... and I'm gonna enjoy every second..."
Playa - Male 1: "They're nothing compared to their leader. I'm gonna enjoy every second of tearing Zinyak apart."
Playa - Male 2: "Believe me... when I get my hands on Zinyak I'm gonna take my time..."
Playa - Male 3: "Zinyak can't hide forever, and when I find him he's gonna wish he fell on his own sword..."
Nolan North: "They're nothing compared to their leader. I'm gonna enjoy every second of tearing Zinyak apart."
Johnny Gat: "Take your time, huh? Sounds like a plan."
Playa: "I get the chance? I'm gonna rip Zinyak's goddamn head off."
— "Run to Umbilicus"
Johnny Gat: "Where do you think the Zin have Kinzie?"
Playa - Female 1: "I dunno. But when I find Matt and Asha, I'm gonna beat that information out of them."
Playa - Female 2: "I dunno. But when I find Matthew and Asha, I'm gonna beat that information out of them."
Playa - Female 3: "I dunno. But when I find Matt and Asha, I'm gonna beat that information out of them."
Playa - Male 1: "I dunno. But when I find Matt and Asha, I'm gonna beat that information out of them."
Playa - Male 2: "I dunno. But when I find Matt and Asha, I'm gonna beat that information out of them."
Playa - Male 3: "I dunno. But when I find Matt and Asha, I'm gonna beat that information out of them."
Nolan North: "I dunno. But when I find Matt and Asha, I'm gonna beat that information out of them."
— "Umbilicus Walk"
Playa - Female 1: "Fuck was that?"
Playa - Female 2: "What the fuck was that?"
Playa - Female 3: "Fuck was that?"
Playa - Male 1: "Fuck was that?"
Playa - Male 2: "Fuck was that?"
Playa - Male 3: "Fuck was that?"
Nolan North: "Fuck was that?"
— "Bomb1 Goes"
Playa - Female 1: "This looks important. Let's blow this up."
Playa - Female 2: "This looks important. Let's blow this up."
Playa - Female 3: "This looks important. Let's blow this up."
Playa - Male 1: "This looks important. Let's blow it up."
Playa - Male 2: "This looks important. Let's blow this up."
Playa - Male 3: "This looks important. Let's blow this up."
Nolan North: "This looks important. Let's blow this up."
— "Bomb Plant2"
Playa - Female 1: "Shaundi!"
Playa - Female 2: "Shaundi--!"
Playa - Female 3: "Shaundi!"
Playa - Male 1: "Shaundi!"
Playa - Male 2: "Shaundi!"
Playa - Male 3: "Shaundi!"
Nolan North: "Shaundi!"
— "Shaundi Hostage"
Johnny Gat: "What the hell?"
Playa: "We're moving. Why are we moving? Let's get to the bridge."
— "Bridge Run"
Johnny Gat: "Shit! Are we driving into the sun?"
Playa - Female 1: "Okay, let's... check some computer thing..."
Playa - Female 2: "Shit, what would Kinzie do? Run a diagnostic?"
Playa - Female 3: "Gotta find that owners manual..."
Playa - Male 1: "We gotta check the monitors!"
Playa - Male 2: "Gat, check the monitors!"
Playa - Male 3: "We need to figure out what the hell is going on..."
Nolan North: "We gotta check the monitors!"
CID: "No need. I have already analyzed our situation."
Johnny Gat: "Shit. I forgot Mr. Deus Ex Machina was even on the ship."
CID: "A Zin transport has attached itself and is dragging us toward what I assume is certain doom."
Playa - Female 1: "So how do we stop the "certain doom" part..."
Playa - Female 2: "So what's next?"
Playa - Female 3: "We're not sitting here waiting to die."
Playa - Male 1: "So what can we do about it?"
Playa - Male 2: "So what do we do?"
Playa - Male 3: "Any bright ideas on how to keep us from dying?"
Nolan North: "So what can we do about it?"
CID: "If I were you, I would deal with the strange heat signature by the cargo bay first."
Playa: "Cargo bay? Fuck."
Johnny Gat: "Let's go!"
— "Bridge Arrive"
All the King's Men
Johnny Gat: "I'm gonna skull fuck that bitch."
Playa: "Hope you don't mind hepatitis."
Johnny Gat: "Wha?"
Staying Healthy African American CUTSCENES 0350
Johnny Gat and Playa, in the elevator.
Johnny Gat: "I've been chattin' with King, and it looks like Tanya's takeover didn't sit well with everybody. The Vice Kings are fighting amongst themselves; now's the time to take 'em out for good. King said he was gonna come along, I hope he hasn't gone soft."
Benjamin King: "Don't ever worry 'bout me, baby-boy, cause I'm gonna handle mine."
Johnny Gat: "All I'm sayin' is that since you got here you've been nothin' but talk."
Benjamin King: "I've smoked dozens of fools before. I ain't addin' to the count unless I have to."
Johnny Gat: "That's just fuckin' great."
Benjamin King: "I said don't worry about it."
Johnny Gat: "I don't want you bitchin' out when you see your crew."
Benjamin King: "Ain't my crew, son. That's why I'm here, remember? So how 'bout you put your dick away, pick up your gun, and try to keep your knee away from the bullets."
Gat turns to Playa
Johnny Gat: "You heard the cocky sonofabitch, let's roll."
Return of the King full CUTSCENES 0403
— "Return of the King" cutscene
Benjamin King (unused): "Come on, my ride's over here."
Benjamin King: "If we wanna get to Tanya we gotta get the code to the elevator..."
Johnny Gat: "How are we gonna get that?"
Benjamin King: "She tells everything to her fashion consultant, he shouldn't be too hard to break."
Johnny Gat: "Who is this guy?"
Benjamin King: "Some Eurotrash mother fucker named Stefan."
Johnny Gat: "I hate him already."
— Mission start
Johnny Gat: "We gonna kill Tanya or what?"
Johnny Gat: "I can't believe I ditched Eesh for this..."
Benjamin King: "I thought you were supposed to be hard, Gat. Why we sitting around?"
Benjamin King: "Come on, I wanna get this over with..."
— Nag when stopped
Johnny Gat: "Hey, watch the knee."
Johnny Gat: "Becareful, this thing's loaded."
Johnny Gat: "The fuck you goin'?"
Johnny Gat: "You see King running around like an asshole?"
Benjamin King: "Watch it boy..."
Benjamin King: "Keep your cool, man..."
Benjamin King: "The fuck's your problem?"
Benjamin King: "Careful, this suits imported..."
— After hitting something with the car
Stefan: "Who do you think you are, barging into Stefan's boutique..."
Johnny Gat: "You must be Stefan..."
Stefan: "Are you blind? Of course I am Stefan, now go."
Johnny Gat: "Oh, I'm hopin' you won't come quietly..."
— Upon arriving at Impressions
Benjamin King: "Now you're gonna tell me what I wanna hear, you understand?"
Stefan: "Stefan knows about fashion, not about gangs!"
Benjamin King: "Well Stefan also knows Tanya, so you better start talkin..."
Stefan: "I don't know anything."
Benjamin King: "How do I get in the elevator?"
Stefan: "What are you doing? I don't like this, this makes me vibrate."
Benjamin King: "Wrong answer..."
Stefan: "Tanya tells me nothing, I just love her shoes..."
Benjamin King: "I'd talk if I were you...my arm's getting a little tired..."
Stefan: "You and your friend with the awful hair will release Stefan at once!"
King: "Your bitch ass better stop talking in the third person or I'm gonna drop you on principle..."
Stefan: "Please don't hurt my face, I can't look common..."
Benjamin King: "I'm running out of patience, Stefan..."
Stefan: "You're nothing but a brute!"
Benjamin King: "Tell me how to get to Tanya..."
Stefan: "Why do you hate the beautiful people?"
Benjamin King: "Just tell me the code and I'll let you go..."
Stefan: "Stefan has done nothing to you!"
Stefan: "If you let me go I'll give you five percent off!"
Stefan: "Somebody help Stefan!"
Stefan: "OKOKOKOK! The code is 3131, please don't hurt Stefan!"
Benjamin King: "Thanks for your help..."
— Interrogating Stefan
Benjamin King: "This is it, playa. You sure you're ready?"
Johnny Gat: "King, the only person in this car I'm worried about is you."
Benjamin King: "Then you don't know me, son."
Johnny Gat: "That's why I'm worried."
Benjamin King: "Your faith in me is very encouraging."
Johnny Gat: "I like to be positive."
— On the way to the Penthouse
Benjamin King: "Okay, there it is. The first thing we gotta do is clear a path to the elevator."
Johnny Gat: "What then?"
Benjamin King: "Then we kill Tanya."
Johnny Gat: "My kind of plan."
— After arriving at King's Penthouse
Benjamin King: "They cut the power..."
Johnny Gat: "Yeah, well, it ain't gonna do 'em much good... people bleed just as well in the dark..."
— Power cut
Johnny Gat: "You're the best Tanya's got? Well, I'm dissapointed."
Johnny Gat: "I'm getting tired of droppin' all your hos, Tanya!"
Johnny Gat: "Don't worry, all you muthafucka's get a turn!"
Johnny Gat: "The coroner's gonna be workin' overtime on your ass!"
Johnny Gat: "Now that's what I'm talkin' about!"
Johnny Gat: "I'm ending this here!"
Johnny Gat: "King, this the best your crew's got?"
Johnny Gat: "Oh I'm gonna enjoy this..."
Johnny Gat: "You think you can keep up King?"
— Attack taunt
Benjamin King: "Aw man, you bitches thought you could kill me!?"
Benjamin King: "You dumb muthafuckas never shoulda stepped!"
Benjamin King: "Come on, show daddy what ya got..."
Benjamin King: "The Vice Kings are finished!"
Benjamin King: "You think Tanya can protect you from me!?"
Benjamin King: "You muthafuckas would've been nothing without me!"
Benjamin King: "It ends here!"
— Attack taunt
Tanya: "You're finished, King. The Vice Kings are mine!"
Tanya: "After you're dead, I'm gonna burn Saint's Row to the ground!"
Tanya: "I should have done this years ago!"
— Attack taunt
Tanya: "Help!"
Tanya: "I can't die here!"
— When Tanya is damaged
Johnny Gat: "Where's my cover?"
Johnny Gat: "King, you gonna do somethin', or just let me get shot?!"
— When Gat is damaged
Benjamin King: "Yo Gat, where the fuck are you?"
Benjamin King: "I need some help here!"
— When King is damaged
Johnny Gat: "I'll try to make it quick..."
Johnny Gat: "Bitch, you never had a chance."
Benjamin King: "I'll make it quick..."
Benjamin King: "Stay the fuck down..."
— After knocking down an enemy
Johnny Gat: "You see that King, my boy knows how to get it done!"
Johnny Gat: "Keep it up man!"
Johnny Gat: "Tanya doesn't have a chance."
Johnny Gat: "You've come a long way, haven't you?"
Benjamin King: "Good work son, I can see why Julius picked you..."
Benjamin King: "Don't get too cocky, there's more where that came from..."
Benjamin King: "Not bad..."
Benjamin King: "You're a little to good at this son..."
— After Playa kills an enemy
Johnny Gat: "I'm just getting started."
Johnny Gat: "Who else wants to play?"
Johnny Gat: "None of you mothafuckas can stop us!"
Johnny Gat: "I'm comin' Tanya!"
Johnny Gat: "Now that's how ya get it done."
— After Gat kills an enemy
Benjamin King: "Tanya doesn't have a chance..."
Benjamin King: "You never shoulda turned on me!"
Benjamin King: "Get's easier every time..."
Benjamin King: "Just like old times, huh..."
Benjamin King: "Still worried about me, Gat?"
— After King kills an enemy
Johnny Gat: "Look out!"
Johnny Gat: "Take cover!"
Johnny Gat: "Get behind something!"
Johnny Gat: "You didn't say they had grenades, King!"
Benjamin King: "Take cover!"
Benjamin King: "Look out!"
— When an enemy throws a grenade
Johnny Gat: "You really didn't want to do that."
Johnny Gat: "Hey, don't fuck up my shirt, I got a date tonight."
Johnny Gat: "Alright asshole, you wanna play rough?"
Johnny Gat: "A shot like that, no wonder we're kickin' your ass."
— When Gat is damaged by gunfire
Benjamin King: "None of you bitches got what it takes to stop me!"
Benjamin King: "You got the balls to shoot me?"
Benjamin King: "I'm from Sunnyvale, fool, you don't think I know how to take a bullet?"
Benjamin King: "Listen up, muthafucka, you're gonna wish you stayed home..."
— When King is damaged by gunfire
Johnny Gat: "You got the balls to hit me you sonofabitch?"
Johnny Gat: "You're gonna have to do better than that."
Johnny Gat: "That was cute."
Johnny Gat: "Don't really think that'll stop me, do you?"
— When Gat is damaged by a Melee attack
Benjamin King: "Oh, that was cute..."
Benjamin King: "How'd a weak-ass banger like you ever get in the gang?"
Benjamin King: "You don't know who you're fucking with right now..."
Benjamin King: "That the best you got baby gangsta?"
— When King is damaged by a Melee attack
Johnny Gat: "The hell are you doin'?"
Johnny Gat: "What, you on Tanya's payroll?"
Benjamin King: "I'm on your side, remember?"
Benjamin King: "You better knock that shit off, right now..."
— Friendly fire warning
Johnny Gat: "Fuck this..."
Johnny Gat: "You think you can turn your back on us now!"
Benjamin King: "I ain't takin' that from a bitch like you..."
Benjamin King: "If Julius wanted me dead, he should've done it himself!"
— After turning hostile due to friendly fire
Johnny Gat: "You're not gonna make it out of here!"
Johnny Gat: "A bullet in the back is just as good as a bullet in the front."
Benjamin King: "You aren't gonna be able to run far enough..."
Benjamin King: "It's too late for that!"
— When an enemy flees
Johnny Gat: "King, cover me!"
Johnny Gat: "I ain't gonna miss again..."
Johnny Gat: "This isn't over."
Johnny Gat: "I got more where that came from."
Benjamin King: "Gat, how you holdin' up?"
Benjamin King: "Don't you worry, there's more where that came from..."
Benjamin King: "You bitches never shoulda stuck with Tanya..."
Benjamin King: "If I were you, I'd run..."
— Re-loading
Johnny Gat: "Where now?"
Benjamin King: "The penthouse."
Johnny Gat: "I'm gonna skull fuck that bitch."
Playa: "Hope you don't mind hepatitis."
Johnny Gat: "Wha?"
Staying Healthy full CUTSCENES 0284
— "Staying Healthy" cutscene
Tanya Winters: "Some guys just never get enough of me."
Johnny Gat: "I've had more than my fill, bitch."
Benjamin King: "It's over, girl. You're not gonna be able to fuck your way out of this one."
Tanya Winters: "That's cute, sweetie. That's just precious."
Tanya pulls out a K6 Krukov, but is shot out of the window, only just managing to grab a hold of the ledge
Tanya Winters: "P-p-please don't--"
Benjamin King: "Oh, Tanya, do yourself a favor and die with some dignity."
King steps on her fingers and she lets go, falling
Tanya Winters: "(screams)"
Tanya lands on King's Mag
Johnny Gat: "That sucks for your car. We better get outta here. The cops will be here soon."
Johnny Gat: "You comin' King?"
Benjamin King: "Alright, let's go."
Johnny Gat: "Hey, I know what you told Julius an all, but why don't you stick around and roll with us, I'm sure he wouldn't mind havin' you around."
Benjamin King: "Don't bet on that."
Gat turns to Playa
Johnny Gat: "You think you can find a way back to the Row on your own? Aisha... you know, the pussy calls."
Gat walks off
Benjamin King: "You did good in there, son. Here, I don't think I'll be needing these any more."
King gives Playa the keys to his penthouse
Tanya's Fall From Grace full CUTSCENES 0407
— "Tanya's Fall From Grace" cutscene
Always Use Protection
Johnny Gat: "Look, I know you're supposed to be dead and all, but do you have to look this pissed?"
Aisha: "Johnny, you said you'd take me out to dinner."
Johnny Gat: "And here we are."
Aisha: "At Freckle Bitch's."
Johnny Gat: "Where else would we go?"
Aisha: "Someplace good? Why couldn't you have taken me to Mikano's?"
Johnny Gat: "Aisha, it's not like... hey what's up?"
Johnny turns to The Protagonist
Johnny Gat: "Perfect timing."
Aisha: "You boys talk, I'll be right back."
Johnny Gat: "Whatever, she don't appreciate fine dining. Now I've been talkin' to Eesh's sister. Turns out Tanya's been fuckin' people in every sense of the word. Not only is she blowin' King's bodyguard Big Tony, but she's fuckin' Warren Williams, their numbers guy, whenever Tony ain't lookin'. Between Tony and Warren the only person she isn't leading around by their cock is King. So I'm thinkin' we put the hurt on Tanya, we're fuckin' up the Vice Kings. She's got an operation in Prawn Court, that's where we'll start. Roll in there and put the murder on anyone you see, customers included. Who wants to die for a blowjob right? When you go for Tanya, be careful, she's probably got some muscle in there."
A Romantic Dinner full CUTSCENES 0220
— "A Romantic Dinner" cutscene
Benjamin King: "How much is the studio incident gonna set us back?"
Warren Williams: "The incident? I'm sorry. I thought some muthafuckas blew up my shit. I didn't realize it ain't no thang."
Benjamin King: "How. Much."
Warren Williams: "Including the loss of revenue from Aisha's death... I'd say we're talkin' millions."
Benjamin King: "Okay. We got a few contractors that owe us, convince them to hook us up. That takes care of building. As for Aisha, throw together some memorial box set. People eat that shit up. That should recoup some of our losses. How's Tanya's side of things?"
Anthony Green: "Grip is short, Mr. King."
Benjamin King: "I'm not happy, Anthony. You said she could handle it."
Anthony Green: "It's not her fault Mr. King, the Saints have been fuckin' with her."
Warren Williams: "That's what I'm talkin' about! Are you gonna let these bitches disrespect us?"
Benjamin King: "Everybody, calm the fuck down. We ain't gonna start a war every time some muthafuckas act hard."
Tanya Winters: "We gotta talk about the Saints."
Warren Williams: "Thank you."
Tanya Winters: "Hey, baby..."
Tanya Winters: "They've taken Prawn Court."
Benjamin King: "How did this happen?"
Warren Williams: "How the fuck you think it happened? Look, we need to get together here and just--"
Benjamin King: "What we need is for you to shut the fuck up, you feel me?"
Warren Williams: "Yeah..."
Benjamin King: "What?"
Warren Williams: "Yes, Mr. King."
Benjamin King: "I'll have Monroe put some pressure on the Saints. While they're distracted, it should be easy to take back what's ours. Everything else is business as usual, understood? Now, this meeting is over."
All the King's Men full CUTSCENES 0224
— "All the King's Men" cutscene
America's Next Top Scientist
Tera Patrick: "I don't like this."
Playa: "It's just an interview."
Tera Patrick: "It's live TV - anything can happen."
Playa: "I got shot at getting this shit for you, and now you're telling me you're nervous about being interviewed?"
Tera Patrick: "It's stressful."
Playa: "No, people trying to kill you is stressful."
Tera Patrick: "Listen smartass, you have no idea how hard it is to be in front of the camera."
Playa: "Did you see me on FUZZ?"
Tera Patrick: "Yeah, but you didn't care if you did a bad job - all you had to do was kill a ninja with a chainsaw."
Playa: "True."
Tera Patrick: "Look, let's just get this over with, okay?"
Tera Patrick: "In... Out..."
Playa: "The hell are you doing?"
Tera Patrick: "I'm relaxing..."
Playa: "You really that afraid of looking like a fool on national television?"
Tera Patrick: "You're not helping..."
Playa: "You'll be fine. Can't you just imagine people in their underwear?"
Tera Patrick: "That won't work. I've got a thing with nudity."
Playa: "Then I guess you're fucked."
Tera Patrick: "Again, not helping."
Playa: "We can hold out here - I had the Saints stash some supplies in case shit went bad."
Playa: "Wait here, Tera. I'm going to check to make sure no one's coming."
— At the camp
Jane Valderamma: "Listen, I'm running behind. Just wait for me on the slopes below Mount Claflin; I'll be there soon."
Playa: "Aight, we'll be here."
— After Playa and Tera arrive at the news van
Jane Valderamma: "This is Jane Valderamma, reporting live with Tera: a woman who claims our city is in danger."
Tera Patrick: "That's right, Jane. The Ultor Corporation has been using a secret R&D lab to conduct unethical experiments on the citizens of Stilwater."
Jane Valderamma: "Those are some strong allegations; I'm assuming you have proof."
Tera Patrick: "Oh, absolutely. I mean, I have the bodies of people who were experimented on, as well as some of the chemicals that were used to do it."
Jane Valderamma: "And why do you think Ultor is responsible?"
Tera Patrick: "I conducted the experiments myself."
Jane Valderamma: "So these were the acts of a crazed individual?"
Tera Patrick: "Excuse me?"
Jane Valderamma: "You said that you conducted the experiments..."
Tera Patrick: "Well, yeah, but—"
Jane Valderamma: "So you admit that you perverted science to serve your own twisted desires?"
Tera Patrick: "No! Ultor was the one that was—"
Jane Valderamma: "It's an all-too-familiar tale: a beautiful woman takes a job at a multi-billion dollar global corporation hoping to fulfill her dreams of microbiology, only to find herself disgusted at her failure to ascend the corporate ladder and turns to mad science in order to blackmail her employer. I'm Jane Valderamma, Channel 6 news."
Tera Patrick: "Why did you do that? I thought you were going to help us."
Jane Valderamma: "Journalistic integrity doesn't pay the rent, Tera."
Tera Patrick: "You just humiliated me in public!"
Jane Valderamma: "I just made the Saints a lot of money. Listen honey, Ultor was going to bury this story anyway - at least this way we got a little something out of it. Ultor isn't going away; you'll have plenty of time to plot your little revenge scheme."
Tera Patrick: "Don't worry, I will."
An Amazing Quarter
Dane Vogel (unused): "Let's give another round of applause to Mr. Gryphon and his mining project..."
Dane Vogel (unused): "Thanks to all of you for making it out today...it's been a big year for all of us in the Ultor family, and I think we owe a lot of that to our legal team..."
Dane Vogel (unused): "300 indictments, no convictions!"
Dane Vogel (unused): "But we're not here to celebrate past victories, no matter how impressive...no...we're here to discuss the future."
Dane Vogel: "As many of you know, the restoration of Saints Row was a tremendous success, but that was just the beginning of what Ultor has in mind for Stilwater."
Dane Vogel: "This is Shivington. Once a pristine set of tenement homes, this neighborhood has devolved into a dangerous ghetto, filled with undesirables such as these. Now, I'm sure a lot of you are wondering...ugly buildings, unwashed masses, what the hell is Ultor thinking? My friends, we're thinking about the future. Picture this... glass towers, clean streets, and no one below the poverty line trying to wash your car. Impossible? For a lesser company, maybe. Now I'm not here to make idle promises or vague predictions, no offense to you politicians out there..."
Dane Vogel: "No, I'm here to show you how we're going to do it. Now, obviously before we can remodel Shivington we need to own the land, so how do we do that? By directing the gangs towards Sunnyvale, not only are we lowering the number of our detractors, we're lowering the property value as well, which means when we buy the land, the savings get passed onto you, the stock holders. The gangs cripple each other, we direct funds to the Stilwater Police Department, they increase police presence...and pretty soon all those nasty little gang bangers are gone. Crime stops, property value goes up, and now your population looks like this."
Dane Vogel (unused): "Now here's the best part...this isn't some distant plan, some hypothetical solution...the future is happening now. Most of the undesirables have already been swept away. All that's standing between us and a better world is The Third Street Saints...now I don't know about you, but I'm feelin' pretty good about our odds..."
Andy Zhen
Andy Zhen: "Is the script a problem? Just say the word, baby, we'll toss it!"
The Protagonist: "No, it's cool, I'm just... I'm gonna need cue cards like a motherfucker."
Andy Zhen: "Brilliant! That's so fucking cinema verite! You're gonna kill it!"
— During "Faster, More Intense!"[2]
Jenny Jaros: "It's nice to meet you Mr. Zhen!"
Zhen raises his hand, cutting her off mid-sentence
Andy Zhen: "WHO IS THIS EXTRA AND WHY IS SHE TALKING TO ME?!"
Jenny Jaros: "Oh, Mr. Zhen, I'm playing Kwilanna..."
Andy Zhen: "Really? I thought we were getting a NAME for Kwilanna."
Jenny Jaros: "Nope... Just me!"
Andy Zhen: "That's just fucking great."
Zhen turns to The Protagonist
Andy Zhen: "Look! Missy McNobody over here isn't gonna bring you down, I promise. I won't let her! Okay? You just be yourself, you're gonna kill it."
Zhen turns to The Protagonist
Andy Zhen: "Alright! LET'S SHOOT THIS FUCKER!"
— During "Faster, More Intense!"[2]
Andy Zhen: "WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING UP THERE?"
Zhen yells into megaphone
Andy Zhen: "JENNY, SAY YOUR GOD DAMN LINE!"
Jenny Jaros: "I'm gonna kill that son of a bitch!"
Andy Zhen: "THAT'S NOT YOUR LINE! OH GODDAMMIT ARE YOU EVEN OFF BOOK?"
— After the player completes "That's Not in the Script!"[3]
Andy Zhen: "YOU ALREADY BLEW THE TAKE, GO BACK TO ONE!"
Andy Zhen: "ARE YOU DEAF, WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!"
Jenny Jaros: "We're killing it."
— After noticing Jenny's Aegean is hurtling straight towards him in "That's Not in the Script!"[3]
Angelo Lopez
Angelo (audio): "¡Lo sabía!"
Angelo (subtitle): "(Spanish)"
Angelo (translation): "I knew it!"
Angelo: "You'll die for what you did to my brother."
— Angelo Lopez, Upon hearing Manuel Orejuela's betrayal and attempts to gun down the Saints.[4]
Appointed Defender
Playa sits at the bar and orders a 40Oz. On the TV, Jane Valderamma is reporting from outside the courthouse.
Jane Valderamma: "It's said by some, to be the trial of the century. A notorious member of a gang once known as "The 3rd Street Saints", Johnny Gat was arrested last year in an assassination attempt against then decorated police officer Troy Bradshaw. In the resulting trial, Gat was convicted of one count of attempted murder, and a staggering three hundred eighty seven counts of 1st degree murder...promptly sending him to death row. Over the past year Gat's legal team has filed appeal after appeal-"
The Brotherhood gang member: "Hey Barry, turn this shit off!"
The Bartender turns the TV off.
Playa: "I was watching that."
The Brotherhood gang member: "I guess you're not anymore, are ya bitch?"
Playa lowers their head, but then grabs the Brotherhood gang member's beer bottle and smashes him across the face with it.
Playa: "Could ya turn the TV back on?"
Jane Valderamma: "In a few short moments, we'll be allowed back in the courtroom and we'll find out once and for all if Mr. Gat will go home a happy man, or a dead one. Back to you Jack."
Playa: "Oh shit..."
The Brotherhood gang member (unused): "That's the cunt that hit me!"
— "Check, Please" cutscene
Judge Melmack: "Mr. Gat, you've been convicted of over three hundred murders, do you really expect this appeal to work?"
Johnny Gat: "I figure with the statute of limitations it really should be closer to two fifty."
Judge Melmack: "There's no statute of limitations for murder!"
Johnny Gat: "Why the fuck not?"
Judge Melmack: "Watch yourself Mr. Gat."
Johnny Gat: "Or what, you'll hold me in contempt of court? You're already planning on giving me the chair, you think I give a shit about you not liking me? Fuck off..."
Judge Melmack: "I'm curious if you can keep your cavalier attitude when 2000 volts are running through your body."
Johnny Gat: "Oh yeah? And I'm curious if you can keep acting like a douche bag when I shove that gavel up your ass."
Legal Lee: "My client would like that stricken from the record..."
Gunshots are heard outside the courtroom.
Judge Melmack: "What's that?"
One of the guards draws a VICE 9 and moves to check out the disturbance, only to be knocked over by Playa kicking the door down on top of him. The other guard moves to check on him, but is held up by Playa.
Playa: "Drop it."
He does so. His gun goes off upon hitting the ground, making everyone except Gat panic and hide. Legal Lee then pokes his head back out for a moment:
Legal Lee: "Anyone hit and need a lawyer?"
Playa grabs the keys to Gat's handcuffs off the first guard's belt and tosses them to Gat.
Johnny Gat: "Shit, 'bout time your burnt ass woke up..."
Playa: "You ok Johnny?"
Johnny Gat: "Yeah, aside from almost getting sent to the chair I'm fuckin' great...hey you look different, you do somethin' with your hair?"
Playa: "You ready to get outta here?"
Playa hands the gun stolen from the first guard over to Johnny, then turns to lead the way back out.
— "Courtroom Drama" cutscene
Johnny Gat: "Thanks for bustin' me out, Eesh woulda killed me if I got executed."
Playa: "You still with Aisha?"
Johnny Gat: "Yeah. I mean, it got a little tricky what with me on death row and her being on the DL after faking her own death but, ya know, we found a way to make it work."
Playa: "How long were you in jail anyway?"
Johnny Gat: "Two years and 31 days."
Playa: "Not like you were counting..."
Johnny Gat: "Yeah, right? It's weird...people inside were betting how long I'd last...when I was first busted guards were always tryin' to put me in the ground. After Troy became chief of police it all stopped...Troy must be more forgiving than I am."
Playa: "Troy's the Chief of Police?"
Johnny Gat: "You better start getting with the times. Julius is missing, Ben King wrote an autobiography, Dex is a...don't even get me started with Dex...but the real kicker is Troy. In a couple months he went from undercover cop to chief of police...and word is he's become obsessed with finding out what happened on your little boat trip with the Alderman."
Playa: "If I get some free time I might swing by the station and say hello..."
Johnny Gat: "With these cops on our ass, you might not have to wait long..."
Playa: "Is forgive and forget still open?"
Johnny Gat: "Time's changed, but not that much..."
Playa: "Good to know the world's not totally crazy..."
— Driving with Gat
Legal Lee: "Watch the lines of my suit..."
Legal Lee: "Hey hey, no touching..."
Legal Lee: "You can't take me as a meat shield unless I'm on retainer..."
— After attempting to take Legal Lee as a Human Shield
Johnny Gat: "I gotta tell ya Lee, you're a helluva lawyer..."
Johnny Gat: "It's been a pleasure workin' with you Lee..."
Johnny Gat: "Whaddya say I keep you from getting shot and we wave the lawyer fee?"
Johnny Gat: "I guess I was let off for good behavior..."
Johnny Gat: "This is one for your case portfolio, eh lee?"
— Johnny Gat chatting with Legal Lee
Legal Lee: "Johnny, I like your style..."
Legal Lee: "You ever get arrested again Mr. Gat, you let me know..."
Legal Lee: "Please don't kill me when I send you the bill for this..."
Legal Lee: "Great, now I'm an acessory..."
Legal Lee: "Try not to kill them, they're potential customers..."
— Legal Lee chatting with Johnny Gat
Legal Lee: "I'm pressing charges!"
Legal Lee: "I'm just a civil servant!"
Legal Lee: "I'll see you in court when I'm out of the hospital!"
Legal Lee: "I didn't pass the bar just so I could get shot!"
Legal Lee: "You'll be hearing from me about that..."
— When Legal Lee takes damage
Legal Lee: "Be careful, that's dangerously close to slander..."
Legal Lee: "Is that anyway to talk to your friends lawyer?"
Legal Lee: "Now that's just uncalled for..."
Legal Lee: "Come on, who loves ya more than me baby?"
Legal Lee: "Becareful, you might need me after you run over a lady with a walker..."
— After Taunting Legal Lee
Legal Lee: "It's true...I am the greatest legal mind of our generation."
Legal Lee: "Ya know what's great about me? Everything."
Legal Lee: "See that's what I like about you, you appreciate talent."
Legal Lee: "You ever get busted for serial arson I'll be sure to get you out..."
Legal Lee: "Do you have legal representaion?"
— After Complimenting Legal Lee
Asha's VIP
Asha: "I need to de-stress. I have an idea for something fun."
The Protagonist: "Fun? What exactly does an MI6 agent think is fun?"
Asha: "You don't know? Well then. This will be educational."
The Protagonist: "Educational, huh. You know me so well."
— "Start Phonecall"
Asha: "So, you ready to put your life on the line to protect another."
The Protagonist: "Asha, I'm pretty much a superhero. I'm set for whatever you can throw at me."
Asha: "You'll find Matt has disabled your special abilities for the duration of this exercise."
Asha: "But don't worry, you'll get them back once the exercise is complete."
— "Mission Start"
The Protagonist: "So who's the mark?"
Asha: "You're on the client's time now. You do whatever needs to be done."
— "Part One Convo"
Asha: "Intel reports high threat probability at our next stop so we should be prepared for anything."
The Protagonist: "Right. Absolutely. Potential threats all over the place."
Asha: "I'm glad to see you taking this so seriously."
The Protagonist: "Is MI6 really called upon to escort TV correspondents on shopping trips?"
Asha: "Prior to MI6, I babysat over-privileged children of foreign dignitaries on multiple occasions. And after, a certain street gang..."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "That's NEWSTIME STREET GANG OF THE YEAR thankyouverymuch."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Hey! That street gang became Head of State!"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Some of my best friends are over-privileged children of foreign dignitaries."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "INTERNATIONAL CELEBRITIES, you mean."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "TRY THE BEST STREET GANG."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Oh yeah? Anyone I know?"
Nolan North: "INTERNATIONAL CELEBRITIES, you mean."
— "Part Two Convo"
The Protagonist: "Alright. This is bugging me. I know that woman. Who is she?"
Asha: "Are--are you serious? That's Tammy Tolliver."
The Protagonist: "The reporter from GenkiBowl? Couldn't find any diplomats in town or something?"
Asha: "Security work is a cereal box. You don't get to pick your prize."
— "First Stop"
Asha: "Hey. See that guy over there?"
Asha: "Tell me: Is he a threat?"
The Protagonist: "I don't know."
Asha: "It's your job to know. You have to decide, right now: take him out and possibly kill an innocent human being or let him go and potentially put your VIP in mortal danger."
— "Pop Quiz Hot Shot"
The Protagonist: "Wow. You're really going all out with this."
Asha: "Matt, feel free to dial things down a bit."
Asha: "Matt? Matt?!"
Zinyak: "Oh, is he not answering? Shame. I must have accidentally cut him off."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Zinyak, you fucking--"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Zinyak, you ass-headed--"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Zinyak, you shit-eating--"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Zinyak, you piece of shit--"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Zinyak, you motherfucking--"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Zinyak, you royal arsehole--"
Nolan North: "Zinyak, you piece of shit--"
Zinyak: "Always with the vulgarity. ANYWAY. Have some fun with these, mmm, minor changes I made."
— "Part Three Pinned"
Asha: "A little help, please!"
Asha: "I'm down!"
Asha: "I need your help!"
— "Part Three Asha Nag"
Asha: "Hold on. I'm calling in a rescue vehicle."
The Protagonist: "You can do that? Without Matt?"
Asha: "I wouldn't put us in harm's way without some backup protocol, you know."
— "Part Three Rescue"
Asha: "Keep sharp. We may have a situation."
Asha: "All right, sit tight. Car should be here shortly."
— "Part Three"
Asha: "Oh shit!"
The Protagonist: "This part of your plan?"
Asha: "Uh. Yeah. Let's say it is."
— "Part Three Rocket Shot"
Asha: "So are we enjoying ourselves then?"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "You sure know how to show a girl a good time. But we need to get Tammy somewhere safe."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Not bad, secret agent. But I bet Tammy's had enough."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Yeah, actually I am. But Tammy isn't."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Not a bad time actually. But we need to get Tammy out of here."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "It's alright. But I think it's time to get Tammy home."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Yeah, it's not bad. But we need to get Tammy out of here."
Nolan North: "Not a bad time actually. But we need to get Tammy out of here."
Asha: "We're almost done. Just one more stop."
— "Part Three Convo"
The Protagonist: "I'll be right back. I'm going to get the car."
The Protagonist: "You both sit tight. I'll be back for you."
— "Part Four Car Get"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Well. Fuck."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Well. Fuck."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Well. Fuck."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Well shit."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Well. Fuck."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Well. Fuck."
Nolan North: "Well. Fuck."
— "Part Four Car"
The Protagonist: "Both of you in!"
Asha: "Focus on the road. Let me handle the firepower."
— "Part Four VIP Rescue"
Asha: "We're coming out now."
Asha: "Everything clear?"
The Protagonist: "Blue skies and hummingbirds. Come on out."
— "Coming Out"
Asha: "You'll need a vantage point. Get to that rooftop across the way over there."
Asha: "Cover the VIP as I escort her into the building."
— "Get to Roof"
The Protagonist: "*pew*pew*pew*"
Asha: "What are you doing?"
The Protagonist: "Pretending to shoot stuff."
Asha: "You're easily bored, aren't you?"
The Protagonist: "Dunno. I'm usually too busy being awesome to be bored."
— "Roof Convo"
Asha: "Snipers!"
The Protagonist: "Shit!"
Asha: "You said we were clear!"
The Protagonist: "I thought we were!"
— "Sniper Attack"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Why exactly would people be targeting Tammy Tolliver? She steal someone's prized cat toy or something?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Tammy Tolliver's boss as an assassination target? Sure. But her? Why?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Tammy Tolliver seems a strange target. What'd she do anyway?"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Who would be trying to kill Tammy Tolliver? Her boss, sure. But what did she do?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Any idea who'd want to kill Tammy? She seems nice enough. I guess."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "So why are people trying to off Tammy? She cross a drug lord or something?"
Nolan North: "Who would be trying to kill Tammy Tolliver? Her boss, sure. But what did she do?"
Asha: "We don't know. You might be surprised to learn how little information agents are actually given. Usually just a name and an objective."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Then what's your motivation for doing it?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "And you ask no questions? Why do you do it?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "You could be escorting international criminals. Why do it?"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "If you don't know why you're doing something, why do it?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Without knowing the details, why do it?"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Really? Then why do you do it?"
Nolan North: "If you don't know why you're doing something, why do it?"
Asha: "Queen and country. The greater good. Duty and honor--"
The Protagonist: "And one too many action movies as a kid?"
Asha: "NO SUCH THING."
— "Sniper Convo"
The Protagonist: "So everything according to plan, huh?"
Asha: "What's life without a few curveballs, you know?"
— "Part Five Convo"
The Protagonist: "What is Zinyak's fascination with Genki? Why don't the two of them just make a baby already."
Asha: "Do not put that image in my head."
— "Part Five Genki Crazy"
The Protagonist: "Okay, we're here. What now? Is this over?"
Asha: "As soon as the VIP's helo arrives. She's still in our charge until then."
— "Part Five VIP Dropoff"
The Protagonist: "Um. Is that how it's being delivered?"
Asha: "I don't think so..."
— "Part Five Gift Drop"
The Protagonist: "Aim for the mascots!"
The Protagonist: "Die, mascots, die!"
The Protagonist: "Get those furry sonsabitches!"
— "Part Five Kill"
Asha: "There's no way we can take him!"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "I could if I had my super powers."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "I could if I had my super powers."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "I could if I had my super powers."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "I could if I had my super powers."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "I could if I had my super powers."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "I could if I had my fucking super powers."
Nolan North: "I could if I had my super powers."
Asha: "Oh. Huh. Right. Well."
Matt Miller: "Hello? Hello? Can you hear me?"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Glad you could make it back! You can give me my super powers now."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Glad you could make it back! You can give me my super powers now."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Oh, glad you could make it back! Now let me start throwing fire again."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Glad you could make it back! You can give me my super powers now."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Glad you could make it back! Now let me fucking shoot fire."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Glad you could make it back! You can give me my super powers now."
Nolan North: "Glad you could make it back! You can give me my super powers now."
Matt Miller: "Ooh, I don't think so. I'm not falling for your tricks--"
Asha: "Matt! Give the powers back!"
Matt Miller: "Oh! Oh, I see, okay."
Matt Miller: "What on Earth happened while we were disconnected--"
The Protagonist: "Explain later. Powers now."
— "Part Five Outgunned"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Did he just turn into some kind of...Super-Genki?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Did he just turn into some kind of...Super-Genki?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Did he just turn into some kind of...Super-Genki?"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Did he just turn into some kind of...Super-Genki?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Did he just turn into some kind of... Super-Genki?"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Did he just turn into some kind of...Super-Genki?"
Nolan North: "Did he just turn into some kind of...Super-Genki?"
Asha: "It appears so."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "DAMMIT."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "DAMMIT."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Oh come on! DAMMIT."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "DAMMIT."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "DAMMIT."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "DAMMIT."
Nolan North: "DAMMIT."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "What the hell is he doing--holy shit!"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "What the hell is he doing--holy shit!"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "What the hell is he doing--holy shit!"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "What the hell is he doing--holy shit!"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "What the hell is he doing? Holy shit!"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "What the hell is he doing--holy shit!"
Nolan North: "What the hell is he doing--holy shit!"
— "Part Five Super Genki"
Asha: "Oh my. This is...wow."
The Protagonist: "Not bad, huh?"
Asha: "Let's kick some Genki ass."
— "Part Five Asha Power Up"
The Protagonist: "Up ya go!"
The Protagonist: "Get into the car! GET IN!"
— "VIP Get in Car"
The Protagonist: "Oh man. Am I glad that's over."
Asha: "Not bad. You can really handle yourself."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Heh. When it comes to ganking Genki, I'm your girl."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Well, when it comes to Genki, I always try to kill the best I can."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "You didn't do too bad yourself. For a spy."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "When it comes to the world's favorite homicidal professor, I have way too much experience."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Thanks. Not so bad yourself. For a spy."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Yeah, well, I do a lot of killing..."
Nolan North: "When it comes to the world's favorite homicidal professor, I have way too much experience."
— "Genki Fight Over"
Asha Odekar
The Protagonist: "You're like Johnny Gat with better hair."
Asha: "I'm nothing like Johnny Gat."
— The intro cutscene for The Case of Mr. X
Shaundi: "I can't believe Asha sleeps with you."
Matt Miller: "I can't believe you don't."
— Gat out of Hell end cutscene
Assault on Precinct 31
Shaundi: "You gonna stand there, or you gonna work out?"
Playa: "I get enough cardio running from the cops."
Shaundi: "Suit yourself."
Playa: "I'm surprised you can run 5 minutes without coughing up a lung, let alone 5 miles."
Shaundi: "I'm full of surprises."
Playa: "Then surprise me and tell me how we're gonna take out The General...."
Shaundi: "Well, that creep's always riding around in that limo of his, right?"
Playa: "Yeah..."
Shaundi: "So I figure the easiest way to find him is to go and tap into the traffic cameras at the police station."
Playa: "I don't know if "easiest" would be the word I'd use."
Shaundi: "Alright so it's not the easiest way but it's the quickest...besides now I get to tag along."
Playa: "Are you high? Or do you not remember the part where I told you that I wasn't gonna babysit you?"
Shaundi: "OK, so you're gonna hack into the traffic cameras then?"
Shaundi: "Yeah, that's what I thought...let's go boss."
— "Where's the Fun in Easy?" cutscene
Shaundi: "This should be a new look for you, you look great in a jumpsuit."
Playa (Male Voice 1): "Never say that again."
Playa (Male Voice 2): "I feel ridiculous..."
Playa (Male Voice 3): "If you tell anyone I wore this I'll kill you."
Playa (Female Voice 1): "You put a picture of this on your blog I'll kill you."
Playa (Female Voice 2): "Hon, you're the last person I want fashion tips from."
Playa (Female Voice 3): "I'm sure it's slimming..."
Shaundi: "You gotta learn how to take a compliment, boss..."
Shaundi comments on Playa's jumpsuit Saints Row 2 VOC SP 01731
— After hijacking the van
Playa (Male Voice 1): "So once you tap into these computers you'll be able to find The General?"
Playa (Male Voice 2): "You sure tappin' the cameras is gonna work? I don't think they're gonna let us sit there and watch monitors all day..."
Playa (Male Voice 3): "So all we gotta do is get you to the monitoring station?"
Playa (Female Voice 1): "So we tap the cameras and we're golden, right?"
Playa (Female Voice 2): "We can talk about fashion later, you sure tapping the cameras is all we need to do?"
Playa (Female Voice 3): "Just let me make sure I get the plan. We hack into the traffic cameras and we find The General?"
Shaundi: "Just tapping into the cameras isn't enough, that's why Pierce is jacking some electronics so we can set up surveilence at the hideout."
— On the way to the police headquarters.
Receptionist: "Welcome to the Stilwater Police Department, how may I help you?"
Playa (Male Voice 1): "Word is you got some broke ass computers."
Playa (Male Voice 2): "Yeah, we're here to fix the...uh...the thing..."
Playa (Male Voice 3): "Well you see, there's this thing...and it's broken."
Playa (Female Voice 1): "So there's something broken right? And it's our job to fix it..."
Playa (Female Voice 2): "Yeah, I uh. We'll we need to...Shaundi you wanna take care of this?"
Playa (Female Voice 3): "We've been called in to fix...stuff..."
Shaundi: "We're here to fix the computers in the monitoring station."
Receptionist: "God there's something always acting up in this place...the monitoring station's upstairs."
— Mid-mission cutscene
Pierce calls
Pierce: "I got the stuff Shaundi wanted, you sure she knows what she's doing?"
Playa (Male Voice 1): "Ya know, that's a damn good question...I'll look into that."
Playa (Male Voice 2): "God I hope so. We'll meet you back home..."
Playa (Male Voice 3): "I really should have asked that before we broke into a police station shouldn't I've..."
Playa (Female Voice 1): "Damn right I'm sure. Well...I'm pretty sure, I mean there's a descent chance Shaundi knows something about computers...oh shit."
Playa (Female Voice 2): "If not at least we got some computer stuff to pawn. See ya back home..."
Playa (Female Voice 3): "Have some faith Pierce, we'll see you soon..."
Playa: "Alright people, here's the deal. We got a truck full of electronic shit that I don't know how to use...I want you guys to help unload the truck and set up shop here. Once we're up and running I want someone watching these monitors 24-7; the moment someone sees that fucking limo I wanna know about it...let's get to work."
Playa turns to Shaundi
Playa: "This is going to work right?"
Shaundi: "Probably."
Playa: "You had me break into a police station for something that would probably work?"
Shaundi: "Well, ya know, I thought it would be good times."
Playa: "Thanks Shaundi."
Shaundi: "Any time."
— "Sliver" cutscene
Bad Trip
Mr. Sunshine: "Wakey wakey..."
Playa: "Where am I?"
The General: "You are sitting with your betters my friend. I wanted to see the face of the individual who had caused me so much trouble...so far I find the experience to be underwhelming..."
Playa: "Who the fuck are you?"
The General: "I am the man whose property you stole and destroyed..."
Playa: "Oops."
The General: "You needn't dwell on your mistakes...you will not live to learn from them..."
Playa: "That so?"
Mr. Sunshine: "I'm afraid it is..."
Playa: "Who the fuck are you?"
Mr. Sunshine: "They call me Mr. Sunshine."
Playa: "Well listen sunshine, I don't care how fucked up your face is, I ain't scared of you, or that other asshole."
Mr. Sunshine: "Pity."
The General: "Gentleman, I'm through meeting my adversary...if you please, dispose of this trash."
Sons of Samedi gang member: "Of course General."
Playa: "You're a general?"
Playa: "You hear that? That asshole thinks he's a- SHIT!"
Playa: "This is a bad time to be fucked up..."
— "Clam Baking" cutscene
Shaundi: "What the hell did you do boss? The Samedi are tearin' our place apart!"
Playa (Male Voice 1): "Shaundi...you're not here...how am I hearing you..."
Playa (Male Voice 2): "Shaundi...this plastic box stole your voice..."
Playa (Male Voice 3) (subtitle): "*speaks Spanish*"
Playa (Male Voice 3) (audio): "Shaundi, me siento bien"
Playa (Male Voice 3) (translation): "Shaundi, I feel good"
Playa (Female Voice 1): "That sounds like fun..."
Playa (Female Voice 2): "I've had a crazy day too, this limo picked me up and there was this guy name Mr. Nice or something.[5]"
Playa (Female Voice 3): "What is a leprechaun doing in this phone?"
Shaundi: "Holy shit, are you high?"
Playa (Male Voice 1): "You know what's cool about you? Your name. Is that Irish?"
Playa (Male Voice 2): "I really like your hair Shaundi..."
Playa (Male Voice 3) (subtitle): "*speaks Spanish*"
Playa (Male Voice 3) (audio): "Si, si, yo soy."
Playa (Male Voice 3) (translation): "Yes, yes I am."
Playa (Female Voice 1): "Shaundi you're like the coolest Saint ever. Way cooler than Dex, that guy was no fun."
Playa (Female Voice 2): "Do you think Pierce likes me? Because sometimes I can't tell."
Playa (Female Voice 3): "Don't worry magic phone, I'll save you."
Shaundi: "I'm gonna die...great..."
— Phone call with Shaundi upon mission start
Playa (Male Voice 1): "Come on Pierce, this is the best part of the job..."
Playa (Male Voice 2): "Man up Pierce, I'm fucked up and I'm killin' more people than you..."
Playa (Male Voice 3) (subtitle): "*speaks Spanish*"
Playa (Male Voice 3) (audio): "
Bad Trip unused line - Combat 1 - Male Hispanic
Pierce, vas a matar a alguien o seguir hablando?
"
Playa (Male Voice 3) (translation): "Pierce, are you going to kill someone or are you going to keep talking?"
Playa (Female Voice 1): "If I can kill people high you can kill people sober!"
Playa (Female Voice 2): "Can you stop complaining and just kill someone?"
Playa (Female Voice 3) (subtitle): "*speaks Spanish*"
Playa (Female Voice 3) (audio): "
Bad Trip unused line - Combat 1 - Female Hispanic
no seas niño pierce
"
Playa (Female Voice 3) (translation): "don't be a kid pierce"
— Labelled "Combat 1"
Playa (Male Voice 1): "Less talk, more murder!"
Playa (Male Voice 2): "Less talk, more shooting."
Playa (Male Voice 3) (subtitle): "*speaks Spanish*"
Playa (Male Voice 3) (audio): "
Bad Trip unused line - Combat 2 - Male Hispanic
Créeme pierce, estoy contigo
"
Playa (Male Voice 3) (translation): "Believe me pierce, i am with you"
Playa (Female Voice 1): "Quit complaining, this is fun!"
Playa (Female Voice 2): "Hey shut up! Some of us are trying to fight over here!"
Playa (Female Voice 3) (subtitle): "*speaks Spanish*"
Playa (Female Voice 3) (audio): "
Bad Trip unused line - Combat 2 - Female Hispanic
piensa en algo feliz pierce
"
Playa (Female Voice 3) (translation): "think about happy things, pierce"
— Labelled "Combat 2"
Playa (Male Voice 1): "Whatever Pierce, we got this..."
Playa (Male Voice 2): "Pierce wash the sand out of your vagina and start killing people."
Playa (Male Voice 3) (subtitle): "*speaks Spanish*"
Playa (Male Voice 3) (audio): "
Bad Trip unused line - Combat 3 - Male Hispanic
Cuantos de estos cabrones necesitamos que matar?
"
Playa (Male Voice 3) (translation): "How many of these assholes we need to kill?"
Playa (Female Voice 1): "Stay focused, cause I can't!"
Playa (Female Voice 2): "Stay cool Pierce, we're gonna get outta this!"
Playa (Female Voice 3) (subtitle): "*speaks Spanish*"
Playa (Female Voice 3) (audio): "
Bad Trip unused line - Combat 3 - Female Hispanic
dejen de hablar, matelos a todos
"
Playa (Female Voice 3) (translation): "stop talking and kill them all"
— Labelled "Combat 3"
Playa (Male Voice 1): "Whatchu talkin' about, these odds are great..."
Playa (Male Voice 2): "Wah wah wah we're gonna die, just shut up and shoot."
Playa (Male Voice 3) (subtitle): "*speaks Spanish*"
Playa (Male Voice 3) (audio): "
Bad Trip unused line - Combat 4 - Male Hispanic
No te preocupes de shaundi, preocúpate de los que están tratando de matarnos
"
Playa (Male Voice 3) (translation): "Don't you worry about shaundi, worry about the ones trying to kill us"
Playa (Female Voice 1): "Piece quit bein' a pussy!"
Playa (Female Voice 2): "Look on the bright side, at least we've killed a lot of people..."
Playa (Female Voice 3) (subtitle): "*speaks Spanish*"
Playa (Female Voice 3) (audio): "
Bad Trip unused line - Combat 4 - Female Hispanic
no puedo pensar mientras que estes hablando(as said)
"
Playa (Female Voice 3) (translation): "i can't think while you're talking"
— Labelled "Combat 4"
Playa (Male Voice 1): "Shaundi, what the hell are you talkin' about?"
Playa (Male Voice 2): "Don't worry Shaundi we'll get through this..."
Playa (Male Voice 3) (subtitle): "*speaks Spanish*"
Playa (Male Voice 3) (audio): "
Bad Trip unused line - Combat 5 - Male Hispanic
Whatever, these guys don't have shit on Los Carnales.[6]
"
Playa (Female Voice 1): "You're doin' great Shaundi, just, ya know, keep killing..."
Playa (Female Voice 2): "Stay focused! We gotta stop the Samedi Shaundi. Samedi Shauni...that rhymed..."
Playa (Female Voice 3) (subtitle): "*speaks Spanish*"
Playa (Female Voice 3) (audio): "
Bad Trip unused line - Combat 5 - Female Hispanic
 ?
"
Playa (Female Voice 3) (translation): "?"
— Labelled "Combat 5"
Playa (Male Voice 1): "Aren't ya glad you signed on with the Saints now?"
Playa (Male Voice 2): "Just keep shooting Shaundi..."
Playa (Male Voice 3) (subtitle): "*speaks Spanish*"
Playa (Male Voice 3) (audio): "
Bad Trip unused line - Combat 6 - Male Hispanic
 ?
"
Playa (Male Voice 3) (translation): "They can't last forever"
Playa (Female Voice 1): "Stay cool Shaundi!"
Playa (Female Voice 2): "These assholes are killing my buzz!"
Playa (Female Voice 3): "*speaks Spanish*"
Playa (Female Voice 3) (subtitle): "*speaks Spanish*"
Playa (Female Voice 3) (audio): "
Bad Trip unused line - Combat 6 - Female Hispanic
No estes chingado, esta bien
"
Playa (Female Voice 3) (translation): "Don't worry, everything is alright"
— Labelled "Combat 6"
Playa (Male Voice 1): "Keep shooting guys, we can do this!"
Playa (Male Voice 2): "You're doin' find Shaundi..."
Playa (Male Voice 3) (subtitle): "*speaks Spanish*"
Playa (Male Voice 3) (audio): "
Bad Trip unused line - Combat 7 - Male Hispanic
Estoy chueco o estamos ganando?
"
Playa (Male Voice 3) (translation): "I am crooked or are we winning?"
Playa (Female Voice 1): "We can take whatever the Samedi throw at us!"
Playa (Female Voice 2): "Shaundi, I'm not exactly feelin' you talking..."
Playa (Female Voice 3): "*speaks Spanish*"
Playa (Female Voice 3) (subtitle): "*speaks Spanish*"
Playa (Female Voice 3) (audio): "
Bad Trip unused line - Combat 7 - Female Hispanic
No te preocupes shanundi, prepara todo esto conejitos borrosos(as said)
"
Playa (Female Voice 3) (translation): "Don't you worry shaundi, prepare for these blurry rabbits"
— Labelled "Combat 7"
Playa (Male Voice 1): "Are there really that many guys? I thought I was just seein' things..."
Playa (Male Voice 2): "They're gonna run out of people eventually..."
Playa (Male Voice 3) (subtitle): "*speaks Spanish*"
Playa (Male Voice 3) (audio): "
Bad Trip unused line - Combat 8 - Male Hispanic
 ?
"
Playa (Male Voice 3) (translation): "This is good to get the group together, right?"
Playa (Female Voice 1): "Christ, don't these people ever stay dead?"
Playa (Female Voice 2): "Keep it together guys, we're doin' fine!"
Playa (Female Voice 3) (subtitle): "*speaks Spanish*"
Playa (Female Voice 3) (audio): "
Bad Trip unused line - Combat 8 - Female Hispanic
Vamos a hacerlo fuera de aqui shanundi, sigue tirando
"
Playa (Female Voice 3) (translation): "Lets do it outside shanundi, keep shooting"
— Labelled "Combat 8"
Shaundi: "Wow that's a lot of dead bodies..."
Pierce: "No kiddin', I was almost out of bullets."
Playa (Male Voice 1): "Yeah, but you didn't."
Playa (Male Voice 2): "That woulda been bad for us, huh..."
Playa (Male Voice 3): "Good thing they didn't know that..."
Playa (Female Voice 1): "We're not gonna have to clean this up are we?"
Playa (Female Voice 2): "Yeah, we almost died...anyone wanna get a gyro?"
Playa (Female Voice 3): "At least you had enough..."
— Labelled "End"
Shaundi: "How ya feelin'?"
Playa: "Comfortable...and very hungry."
Shaundi: "You need help standing up?"
Playa: "No, I'm good here."
Shaundi: "You sure?"
Playa: "Oh yeah."
Shaundi: "Ya know; there could be some more guys lookin' for you."
Playa: "Eh, you could take 'em right?"
Shaundi: "Probably not."
Playa: "That's good."
Shaundi walks away
Shaundi: "Fuckin' lightweights..."
— "Sleep It Off" cutscene
Bank Error in Your Favor
Hacky Sack player: "Sorry!"
Shaundi: "No prob, I got it."
Hacky Sack player: "Watch out!"
Jessica almost runs over Shaundi
Jessica: "Jesus Christ, are you trying to get killed?"
Shaundi: "Look I'm sorry..."
Jessica: "I don't have time for this. Sorry about that baby, I almost dented my car on a hippie chick."
Shaundi: "Hey, I'm not a hippie..."
Jessica: "Maero, I'm fine... Look, I gotta go, I'm about to make the deposit. Sweetie, let me worry about the money...we'll have enough to cover the shipment, and once that comes in the Saints won't have a chance in hell."
Hacky Sack player: "Yo, Shaundi, we gonna hack or what?"
Shaundi makes a phone call
Shaundi: "Hey boss?"
Playa: "Shaundi, I'm watchin' Bobbie and Amber, can it wait?"
Shaundi: "Not really."
Playa: "What's up?"
Shaundi: "Maero's girlfriend just walked into the bank with a suitcase full of money."
Playa: "I'll be right over."
— "Deposit" cutscene
Jessica: "There's no way outta here, just give up..."
Playa: "Alright Jessica, you're gonna turn off that alarm."
Jessica: "Yeah? How am I gonna do that?"
Playa: "Hit. The off button."
— Playa takes Jessica to turn off the alarm.
Jessica: "Please, let me out of here!"
Jessica: "Please, someone help me!"
Maero spots Playa
Maero: "I'm gonna kill you right here, right now..."
Playa: "No, you're not."
Playa throws the keys to Jessica's car to Maero
Maero: "What's this?"
Playa: "Do me a favor: when you check the trunk, just remember you should have offered me something better than 20 percent."
Maero: "No...please no..."
— "Proportional Response" cutscene
Batteries Not Included
Playa - Female 1: "That key ready yet?"
Playa - Female 2: "Is the key finished?"
Playa - Female 3: "Where are we with the key?"
Playa - Male 1: "How's the Key?"
Playa - Male 2: "Is the key ready?"
Playa - Male 3: "Whats the status of the key?"
Nolan North: "How's the Key?"
Phone Call: "Nearly built, but without power it's really just a glorified paperweight."
Playa - Female 1: "So charge it."
Playa - Female 2: "So give it power."
Playa - Female 3: "Shouldn't you plug it in then?"
Playa - Male 1: "So plug it in and let's put it to use."
Playa - Male 2: "What are you waiting for? plug it in."
Playa - Male 3: "So write some code and get it working..."
Nolan North: "So plug it in and let's put it to use."
Phone Call: "If it was that simple don't you think I would've done that?"
Playa - Female 1: "I don't think half the shit you do makes sense, I'm just heading my bets."
Playa - Female 2: "Kinzie, I try to never guess what's going on in your head..."
Playa - Female 3: "I'm just asking..."
Playa - Male 1: "Um, no?"
Playa - Male 2: "Fuck if I know, you're always doing crazy shit..."
Playa - Male 3: "Never hurts to ask..."
Nolan North: "Um, no?"
Phone Call: "Ugh... We need compatible power sources to make it work. I'm sending CID in there to help you with that. Try to be nice to him."
— "Pre Mission Call"
Shaundi SR2: "Ha! It blew up. Okay NOW I'm rubbing it in!"
Playa - Female 1: "I'm not going to hear the end of this..."
Playa - Female 2: "Kinzie's gonna love that..."
Playa - Female 3: "Why me..."
Playa - Male 1: "Shit! Kinzie's gonna be pissed."
Playa - Male 2: "Fuck me..."
Playa - Male 3: "Balls..."
Nolan North: "Shit! Kinzie's gonna be pissed."
CID: "But there is one more cell not far from here."
Shaundi SR2: "Hold on, you said that was the final one."
CID: "If we had obtained it, then it obviously would have been."
— "3rd Cell Explodes"
Playa - Female 1: "Jesus CID, I have to turn off all of these things?"
Playa - Female 2: "Do I really have to turn these all off?"
Playa - Female 3: "I have to power down all of these?"
Playa - Male 1: "Seriously, do I have to shut all these things down?"
Playa - Male 2: "Is all this shit mission critical?"
Playa - Male 3: "I'm seriously supposed to turn those all off?"
Nolan North: "Seriously, do I have to shut all these things down?"
CID: "I do not believe so. Only a couple seem to actually be generating the force field. The rest should be easily destructible decoys."
— "4th Cell Instructions"
CID: "Sensors detect a cell is in this area. The closer we get to it, the more precise I can be."
Shaundi SR2: "Whoa, this thing's pretty handy to have around."
CID: "You have no idea. I have many uses."
Shaundi SR2: "You don't double as a bong, do you?"
CID: "For you I would find a way."
— "Arrive 1st Cell Area"
CID: "The second power cell is not far, though I am detecting fluctuations in the simulation."
Playa - Female 1: "Yeah, that means nothing to me..."
Playa - Female 2: "Little explanation here..."
Playa - Female 3: "What's that mean?"
Playa - Male 1: "What exactly does that mean?"
Playa - Male 2: "Which means..."
Playa - Male 3: "I'm not Kinzie, CID..."
Nolan North: "What exactly does that mean?"
CID: "The Zin are altering the area in some way. I am unsure how."
Shaundi SR2: "Like I said, we've been jinxed."
Playa - Female 1: "We're not jinxed!"
Playa - Female 2: "Luck is for losers."
Playa - Female 3: "There's no such thing..."
Playa - Male 1: "Whatever."
Playa - Male 2: "Pssh."
Playa - Male 3: "Yeah, yeah..."
Nolan North: "Whatever."
— "Arrive 2nd Cell Area"
CID: "We are nearing the final power cell."
Playa - Female 1: "This can't be over soon enough..."
Playa - Female 2: "Good, I can't take much more of this..."
Playa - Female 3: "Good... I need a break from you two..."
Playa - Male 1: "Thank god. Let's get this thing and go."
Playa - Male 2: "Thank god. I just want this to be over..."
Playa - Male 3: "All right, let's just grab the damn thing and get out of here..."
Nolan North: "Thank god. Let's get this thing and go."
Shaundi SR2: "Feeling guilty?"
Playa - Female 1: "You're enjoying this too much..."
Playa - Female 2: "Enjoying this much?"
Playa - Female 3: "You're planning on running this into the ground, aren't you..."
Playa - Male 1: "Enjoying yourself?"
Playa - Male 2: "You're really enjoying yourself, aren't you..."
Playa - Male 3: "You're really enjoying this, aren't you..."
Nolan North: "Enjoying yourself?"
Shaundi SR2: "Oh yeah."
— "Arrive 3rd Cell Area"
CID: "The second final power cell is in this area, and I am reading a large amount of energy output around it."
Playa - Female 1: "So now something else is going to go wrong..."
Playa - Female 2: "Which of course is bad news..."
Playa - Female 3: "And that means something big and scary is going to try to kill us..."
Playa - Male 1: "Let me guess, that means something bad."
Playa - Male 2: "Which means something shitty's about to go down..."
Playa - Male 3: "I'm assuming that's a bad thing?"
Nolan North: "Let me guess, that means something bad."
CID: "Given that our current predicament is a result of your big mouth, I would guess you are correct."
— "Arrive 4th Cell Area"
Playa - Female 1: "Oh, thank god."
Playa - Female 2: "Farewell tank. I'll miss you. Kinzie, she's all yours."
Playa - Female 3: "Whew, made it!"
Playa - Male 1: "There, you have your power cells. Told you I'd make it."
Playa - Male 2: "Three power cells, as promised..."
Playa - Male 3: "It's all yours , Kinzie..."
Nolan North: "There, you have your power cells. Told you I'd make it."
Kinzie: "Oh good."
— "Arrive At Warehouse"
Playa - Female 1: "Pssshh... I'm insulted how easy this is..."
Playa - Female 2: "This is too easy..."
Playa - Female 3: "These guys should be easy to mop up..."
Playa - Male 1: "Good, only a few guards. Easy enough."
Playa - Male 2: "Few guards? This should be easy."
Playa - Male 3: "This is about as easy as it gets..."
Nolan North: "Good, only a few guards. Easy enough."
Shaundi SR2: "What are you doing?"
Playa: "What?"
Shaundi SR2: "You know you just jinxed us, right?"
Playa - Female 1: "Whatever, this is easy..."
Playa - Female 2: "What jinx? I said this was easy..."
Playa - Female 3: "Did you not hear the part about this being easy?"
Playa - Male 1: "What, by saying "easy enough"?"
Playa - Male 2: "I said it was easy, big deal..."
Playa - Male 3: "The only people who are jinxed are the Zin, this is easy."
Nolan North: "What, by saying "easy enough"?"
Shaundi SR2: "Jesus, you said it again!"
Playa - Female 1: "Shaundi's afraid of the big bad jinx?"
Playa - Female 2: "When did you become supersitious Shaundi..."
Playa - Female 3: "Oh come on!"
Playa - Male 1: "Shaundi, what are you twelve?"
Playa - Male 2: "Really?"
Playa - Male 3: "Come on Shaundi, are you kidding me?"
Nolan North: "Shaundi, what are you twelve?"
CID: "It is Chekov's Gun. Saying it is too easy now means something must go wrong later, or else there was no point to this conversation."
Playa - Female 1: "Well shit..."
Playa - Female 2: "Merde."
Playa - Female 3: "Well shit..."
Playa - Male 1: "Well shit..."
Playa - Male 2: "Well shit..."
Playa - Male 3: "Well shit..."
Nolan North: "Well shit..."
Shaundi SR2: "Yeah."
— "Attack 1st Cell Guards"
Playa: "Wait, is that a shield generator?"
Shaundi SR2: "Told you!"
Playa: "Dammit!"
CID: "The shield surrounding the power cell must be disabled, in case you could not figure that out yourself."
Playa - Female 1: "You're taking care of this, right Shaundi?"
Playa - Female 2: "Okay Shaundi, I need your help on this one..."
Playa - Female 3: "Shaundi, it's your time to shine..."
Playa - Male 1: "Shaundi, could you..."
Playa - Male 2: "Okay Shaundi, I'm gonna need, first of all..."
Playa - Male 3: "Shaundi and I are on it..."
Nolan North: "Shaundi, could you..."
Shaundi SR2: "Oh no. You created the problem, you can solve it."
Playa - Female 1: "Come on Shaundi, some of these generators aren't even on!"
Playa - Female 2: "Serendipity, nothing more. Look over there, that generator's not even turned on!"
Playa - Female 3: "Enough with the hoodoo already, the generator over there isn't even on..."
Playa - Male 1: "It's just a coincidence. See, there's a generator not even turned on over there!"
Playa - Male 2: "Whatever, there's a generator over there that's not even turned on!"
Playa - Male 3: "Will you listen to yourself? That generator over there isn't even turned on..."
Nolan North: "It's just coincidence. See, there's a generator not even turned on over there!"
CID: "That suggests the Zin are currently adding more security to the remaining cells. I believe here we only interrupted the process. Shaundi is right."
Shaundi SR2: "Just admit what you did."
Playa - Female 1: "I'm not admitting shit."
Playa - Female 2: "Never."
Playa - Female 3: "I didn't do anything!"
Playa - Male 1: "Not gonna happen."
Playa - Male 2: "Confidence ain't a crime!"
Playa - Male 3: "Fuck no."
Nolan North: "Not gonna happen."
— "Attack 2nd Cell Guards"
Shaundi SR2: "Looks like CID was right, they've got another generator up and running."
Playa - Female 1: "This is your cue to rub it in..."
Playa - Female 2: "So you still being superstitious?"
Playa - Female 3: "Shouldn't you be telling me I'm bad luck?"
Playa - Male 1: "What, no rubbing this in?"
Playa - Male 2: "You gonna pile on the bullshit here, too?"
Playa - Male 3: "Just get it over with and say I'm cursed..."
Nolan North: "What, no rubbing this in?"
Shaundi SR2: "Nope."
Playa: "... Really?"
Shaundi SR2: "We already knew these would be here. I don't see much of a point."
Playa - Female 1: "You got this covered then..."
Playa - Female 2: "Good, then we can..."
Playa - Female 3: "Cool. Shaundi, you're goin..."
Playa - Male 1: "Eh, all right then. So do you mind..."
Playa - Male 2: "Great, then Shaundi--"
Playa - Male 3: "Great, then let's get ba--"
Nolan North: "All right then. Uh, do you mind..."
Shaundi SR2: "Still not helping shut those down."
Playa: "CID...?"
CID: "I am with Shaundi on this one. Do it yourself."
Playa - Female 1: "You're both on my shit list..."
Playa - Female 2: "Fucking useless..."
Playa - Female 3: "You want something done right..."
Playa - Male 1: "Of course you are..."
Playa - Male 2: "This is some bullshit..."
Playa - Male 3: "We're talking about this later..."
Nolan North: "Of course you are..."
— "Attack 3rd Cell Guards"
Shaundi SR2: "This place is lit up like a Feed Dogs concert!"
Playa: "CID, why is everything a target?"
CID: "Because you are cursed."
— "Attack 4th Cell Guards"
Kinzie: "Okay, speech time."
Playa - Female 1: "Let's hear it..."
Playa - Female 2: "Jesus, Kinzie..."
Playa - Female 3: "Here we go..."
Playa - Male 1: "I'll make it, I swear!"
Playa - Male 2: "Please no."
Playa - Male 3: "I wait with baited breath."
Nolan North: "I'll make it, I swear!"
Kinzie: "You HAVE to make it. We NEED those power cells for the Key. Without it, we DON'T defeat Zinyak. Got it?"
Playa - Female 1: "Got it."
Playa - Female 2: "I understand..."
Playa - Female 3: "Don't worry hon... I have it covered."
Playa - Male 1: "I got it!"
Playa - Male 2: "Wow, that was shorter than I was expecting"
Playa - Male 3: "Same page."
Nolan North: "I got it!"
— "Close To Exploding"
Playa: "Where's the battery?"
CID: "Integrated into the tank I believe. The properties of the power cell should increase the speed, destruction, and durability of the vehicle."
Playa - Female 1: "That's what I like to hear..."
Playa - Female 2: "Excellent..."
Playa - Female 3: "I can't wait to give this thing a whirl..."
Playa - Male 1: "Fuck right, time for a little armored destruction!"
Playa - Male 2: "That's what I'm talking about..."
Playa - Male 3: "Finally... something is going my way..."
Nolan North: "Fuck yeah, time for a little armored destruction!"
CID: "However the increase in power will also overload the tank and cause it to explode in a few minutes."
Playa - Female 1: "Jesus Chist..."
Playa - Female 2: "It's always something..."
Playa - Female 3: "COME ON!"
Playa - Male 1: "Uh, what?"
Playa - Male 2: "You're killing me smalls."
Playa - Male 3: "Fuck me..."
Nolan North: "Uh, what?"
CID: "If you can get to Kinzie's warehouse in time, she can set up a field which will stabilize the energy output."
Shaundi SR2: "At least there's a bright side, right?"
Playa - Female 1: "So basically either I make it to Kinzie or I die."
Playa - Female 2: "And doing that is the only way to not to die, yes?"
Playa - Female 3: "So the only way to stop this thing from killing me is to get it to Kinzie?"
Playa - Male 1: "So I drive into that field I don't blow the hell up?"
Playa - Male 2: "And if I don't get it to Kinzie, I'm dead."
Playa - Male 3: "So if I don't make it in time I blow up?"
Nolan North: "So I drive into that field, I don't blow the hell up?"
CID: "Correct. Good luck. You will need it. Shaundi, there is a hookah bar not far from here. Care to join me before I return to the ship?"
Shaundi SR2: "Well, catch you later boss. Have fun!"
Playa - Female 1: "Don't mind me, I'll just be in the murder tank!"
Playa - Female 2: "You're loyalty is inspiring!"
Playa - Female 3: "Are you seriously leaving me?"
Playa - Male 1: "You better hope I don't explode!"
Playa - Male 2: "Thanks for your fucking help!"
Playa - Male 3: "Are you fucking kidding me?"
Nolan North: "You better hope I don't explode!"
— "Getting In Tank"
Playa - Female 1: "CID, I'm going to need you to tell me when we're close to the next cell."
Playa - Female 2: "CID, can you give me a heads up when we're close to the power cell?"
Playa - Female 3: "CID, you're gonna let me know when we're close to the power cell, right?"
Playa - Male 1: "Let me know when we're close to the next cell."
Playa - Male 2: "Tell me when we're close to the power cell..."
Playa - Male 3: "I'm gonna need you to tell me when we're near the next power cell."
Nolan North: "Let me know when we're close to the next cell."
CID: "If you do something for me."
Playa - Female 1: "What the fuck do you want now?"
Playa - Female 2: "What now..."
Playa - Female 3: "Fine..."
Playa - Male 1: "Really, CID? You're asking for something right now?"
Playa - Male 2: "Christ CID, are you really shaking me down?"
Playa - Male 3: "You really want to extort me right now?"
Nolan North: "Really, CID? You're asking for something right now?"
CID: "I require a date with this Shaundi."
Playa - Female 1: "Oh god..."
Playa - Female 2: "You require what?"
Playa - Female 3: "I'm sorry, what?"
Playa - Male 1: "Excuse me?"
Playa - Male 2: "Good luck with that."
Playa - Male 3: "CID, I don't think Sha-"
Nolan North: "Excuse me?"
Shaundi SR2: "Okay."
Playa - Female 1: "Oh god..."
Playa - Female 2: "Seriously?"
Playa - Female 3: "This isn't gonna end well..."
Playa - Male 1: "EXCUSE ME?"
Playa - Male 2: "The fuck just happened?"
Playa - Male 3: "Wow."
Nolan North: "EXCUSE ME?"
Shaundi SR2: "What, could be fun."
— "Going to 2nd Area"
Playa - Female 1: "So how's this "date" going to work..."
Playa - Female 2: "So where does a sociopathic robot take someone on a date?"
Playa - Female 3: "So ya'll worked out the details for your date?"
Playa - Male 1: "So what are you two going to do on this date?"
Playa - Male 2: "Hey CID, where you taking Shaundi on your "date"..."
Playa - Male 3: "You're really planning to go out with CID, aren't you..."
Nolan North: "So what are you two going to do on this date?"
Shaundi SR2: "Way to change the subject and dodge responsibility for those shield generators."
Playa - Female 1: "No, no, I really want to know where a power mad robot takes a lady..."
Playa - Female 2: "I'm not being evasive. I'm being morbidly curious..."
Playa - Female 3: "I'm just really curious, is all..."
Playa - Male 1: "No, I genuinely want to know."
Playa - Male 2: "Hell no, I want details on this trainwreck..."
Playa - Male 3: "What could you two possibly do that doesn't end horribly?"
Nolan North: "No, I genuinely want to know."
CID: "I know a great little pizza place in town."
Shaundi SR2: "I love pizza!"
CID: "Perhaps a movie afterwards as well."
Shaundi SR2: "What's playing?"
CID: "Pride and Prejudice."
Shaundi SR2: "Sounds a little serious, but I'll give it a whirl."
— "Going to 3rd Area"
Shaundi SR2: "You okay, boss?"
Playa - Female 1: "If by "okay" you mean "fucking annoyed" than, yeah..."
Playa - Female 2: "There's nothing to say."
Playa - Female 3: "I'm not happy, Shaundi..."
Playa - Male 1: "I'm not saying another word."
Playa - Male 2: "I'm done talking."
Playa - Male 3: "Not really."
Nolan North: "I'm not saying another word."
Shaundi SR2: "Come on, don't be such a sour puss."
Playa - Female 1: "Woo-saa..."
Playa - Female 2: "Just give me a moment Shaundi..."
Playa - Female 3: "Give a girl some space please..."
Playa - Male 1: "No, not gonna make this go any worse."
Playa - Male 2: "I need a minute Shaundi..."
Playa - Male 3: "No, that's exactly what I'm gonna be..."
Nolan North: "No, not gonna make this go any worse."
Shaundi SR2: "Have it your way."
— "Going to 4th Area"
CID: "Warmer."
CID: "You are getting hotter."
CID: "You are red hot!"
CID: "Blazing!"
CID: "Cold."
CID: "You are getting colder."
CID: "Freezing!"
CID: "You are as cold as ice!"
— "Hot Cold"
Playa - Female 1: "What's the plan, CID?"
Playa - Female 2: "Where are we going?"
Playa - Female 3: "Where to?"
Playa - Male 1: "CID, where we headed?"
Playa - Male 2: "Where to CID?"
Playa - Male 3: "Where are we going CID?"
Nolan North: "CID, where we headed?"
CID: "I have marked the general location for the first power cell, though I am surprised Kinzie also sent along Fake Shaundi to help us."
Shaundi SR2: "Whoa whoa whoa, "Fake Shaundi"?"
CID: "Kinzie explained to me that Shaundi had a doppelganger who hated pants and was very friendly."
Shaundi SR2: "Yeah, that's me. But fake? I'm standing right here!"
CID: "Do not shoot the messenger. Frankly you sound more fun than the other Shaundi. And I love your hair."
Shaundi SR2: "Oh, thanks!"
— "Mission Start"
Playa - Female 1: "Got it."
Playa - Female 2: "Got the first cell."
Playa - Female 3: "That's the first cell."
Playa - Male 1: "Well, that's one."
Playa - Male 2: "One down."
Playa - Male 3: "On to the next one..."
Nolan North: "Well, that's one."
— "Pick Up 1st Cell"
Playa - Female 1: "All right, lets get that last power cell..."
Playa - Female 2: "Ready for the last one."
Playa - Female 3: "One more to go."
Playa - Male 1: "Got it. Let's get the last one already."
Playa - Male 2: "All right, let's find the last one."
Playa - Male 3: "Only one cell left..."
Nolan North: "Got it. Let's get the last one already."
— "Pick Up 2nd Cell"
Playa - Female 1: "I thought the Zin would try a little harder than a roadblock..."
Playa - Female 2: "The Zin can get in my way all they want..."
Playa - Female 3: "They think that's gonna stop a tank?"
Playa - Male 1: "You wanna get in my way? Fine with me."
Playa - Male 2: "Think that's gonna stop me?"
Playa - Male 3: "A roadblock? That's the best Zinyak could come up with?"
Nolan North: "You wanna get in my way? Fine with me."
Playa - Female 1: "Yeah, I'll take these odds..."
Playa - Female 2: "I could do this all day..."
Playa - Female 3: "Another road block? Do these guys ever learn..."
Playa - Male 1: "Ha! Like that's gonna stop me."
Playa - Male 2: "You wanna get run over, that's your business..."
Playa - Male 3: "You think they'd realize this isn't gonna work..."
Nolan North: "Like that's gonna stop me."
— "Roadblock"
Kinzie: "Are you having fun down there?"
Playa - Female 1: "On the plus side... I have a tank. On the down side there's a solid chance of it killing me."
Playa - Female 2: "Considering it might blow up... no."
Playa - Female 3: "I'll be honest, I'm not to wild about driving a bomb..."
Playa - Male 1: "In between my moments of "dear god, dear god, don't let this thing blow me up", yes I am."
Playa - Male 2: "It's a living."
Playa - Male 3: "CID left me to die, so I've been better."
Nolan North: "In between my moments of "dear god, dear god, don't let this thing blow me up", yes I am."
Kinzie: "Don't worry, CID contacted me and I set up the stabilization field. Get the tank back in one piece and you'll be fine."
Playa - Female 1: "Thanks for sparing me the monologue on how careful I need to be..."
Playa - Female 2: "This usually is where you start getting neuortic about collateral damage."
Playa - Female 3: "I'm surprised you haven't hit me with a lecture on how I can't afford to break the key. I think you're growing as person."
Playa - Male 1: "You seem strangely calm about this whole thing, Kinzie. I expected you to be on my case about how without these your Key won't work and I better not screw this up, blah blah blah."
Playa - Male 2: "Isn't this the part where you give me a big lecture on not breaking things?"
Playa - Male 3: "I thought you'd be on my case about how important the key is."
Nolan North: "You seem strangely calm about this whole thing, Kinzie. I expected you to be on my case about how without these your Key won't work and I better not screw this up, blah blah blah."
Kinzie: "Oh, I have that speech all prepared. Figured I'd give you a little more time before I started it."
Playa - Female 1: "That's very big of you Kinzie."
Playa - Female 2: "How mangnanimous."
Playa - Female 3: "Your mercy is boundless."
Playa - Male 1: "You're so kind."
Playa - Male 2: "I'll take what I can get."
Playa - Male 3: "You're showing a lot of restraint Kinzie."
Nolan North: "You're so kind."
Kinzie: "I know."
— "Tank Drive Convo 1"
Playa - Female 1: "So... about this tank..."
Playa - Female 2: "Kinzie, what are your plans for the tank?"
Playa - Female 3: "So what happens to this thing once I drive it over?"
Playa - Male 1: "Kinzie, what's going to happen to this tank when I get it back to the warehouse?"
Playa - Male 2: "So what are you going to do with the tank?"
Playa - Male 3: "So I bring the tank to the warehouse, what happens next?"
Nolan North: "Kinzie, what's going to happen to this tank when I get it back to the warehouse?"
Kinzie: "It'll be dismantled and the power cell will be pulled out for use on my Key."
Playa - Female 1: "Aw, but it's fun, and blows shit up real good..."
Playa - Female 2: "It seems like such a waste of a tank..."
Playa - Female 3: "I don't get to keep the tank?"
Playa - Male 1: "Aww, can't you just find a way to keep it from exploding and let me go on a rampage with this thing?"
Playa - Male 2: "Dismantle? We're not keeping it?"
Playa - Male 3: "We're dismantling a super tank?"
Nolan North: "Can't you just find a way to keep it from exploding and let me go on a rampage with this thing?"
Kinzie: "Hey, do you want to be able to kill Zinyak or don't you? Get revenge for Earth, or get a tank. Your choice."
Playa - Female 1: "*sigh * Revenge for Earth..."
Playa - Female 2: "*sigh * Revenge for Earth..."
Playa - Female 3: "Aw, shit. Revenge for Earth..."
Playa - Male 1: "*sigh * Revenge for Earth..."
Playa - Male 2: "*sigh * Revenge for Earth..."
Playa - Male 3: "*sigh * Revenge for Earth..."
Nolan North: "*sigh * Revenge for Earth..."
Kinzie: "Then quit your bitching."
— "Tank Drive Convo 2"
Playa - Female 1: ""Let's go to a hookah bar, have fun in the death tank...""
Playa - Female 2: "I have to make it back... if I don't I'll never be able to slap CID..."
Playa - Female 3: "Lord, please don't let me die before I get a chance to murder CID..."
Playa - Male 1: "Yeah, I have enough time... I hope I have enough time... Please god let me have enough time."
Playa - Male 2: "This shouldn't be too bad...right?"
Playa - Male 3: "Fucking Benedict Arnolds..."
Nolan North: "Yeah, I have enough time... I hope I have enough time... Please god let me have enough time."
— "Tank Drive Start"
Bending the Rules
Playa - Female 1: "Kinzie, what exactly are these things you're sending me after?"
Playa - Female 2: "Kinzie, please explain what are these things you send me after?"
Playa - Female 3: "Kinzie, what the hell do you have me picking up?"
Playa - Male 1: "Kinzie, why are you sending me after these things and where exactly are they?"
Playa - Male 2: "Kinzie, what're these things you're sending me after, and what am I supposed to DO with them?"
Playa - Male 3: "Once again, Kinzie, I know fuck-all about what you've got me doing or why I'm doing it."
Nolan North: "Kinzie, why are you sending me after these things and where exactly are they?"
Kinzie: "I'm still trying to figure out precisely what they are, but they seem like they'll be useful. There are several near my warehouse. I can't pinpoint their exact locations, but I marked the general areas for you."
Playa - Female 1: "Fine..."
Playa - Female 2: "Very well..."
Playa - Female 3: "Why not?"
Playa - Male 1: "Um, okay..."
Playa - Male 2: "Sure..."
Playa - Male 3: "Might as well..."
Nolan North: "Um, okay..."
— "Mission Start"
Playa - Female 1: "Got one, Kinzie. Is it safe to touch?"
Playa - Female 2: "There is one nearby, Kinzie. I am safe to approach?"
Playa - Female 3: "It's safe, right? This thing isn't gonna irradiate me?"
Playa - Male 1: "Think I got one, Kinzie. You sure this thing's safe?"
Playa - Male 2: "Locked on, Kinzie. How safe is this thing?"
Playa - Male 3: "I'm close, Kinzie. How safe is it to nick this thing?"
Nolan North: "Think I got one, Kinzie. You sure this thing's safe?"
Kinzie: "Safe-ish... just keep getting them."
— "Find First Cluster"
Playa - Female 1: "Finally a song I like. Come on, Kinzie, sing along..."
Playa - Female 2: "Ah, this song is magnifique. Join me in a duet, Kinzie."
Playa - Female 3: "Oh Paula! You're my spirit animal!"
Playa - Male 1: "Oh, I love this song. Come on, Kinzie, sing it with me."
Playa - Male 2: "Oh oh oh oh! I get to be Paula, you're MC Skat Kat!"
Playa - Male 3: "Yes! This song is brilliant. Sing with me, Kinzie."
Nolan North: "Oh, I love this song. Kinzie! Kinzie, you gotta sing this with me."
Kinzie: "No, I don't think so."
Playa - Female 1: "Come on, please, Kinzie. You can be the Kat!"
Playa - Female 2: "I insist! I'll even let you be the Kat."
Playa - Female 3: "Come on, Kinzie. You can't stonewall Paula!"
Playa - Male 1: "Oh come on. I'll even let you be the Kat."
Playa - Male 2: "The fuck you mean, "don't think so." You're playing the goddamn Kat!"
Playa - Male 3: "Oh, this is happening, even if I have to let you be the Kat."
Nolan North: "Oh come on. I'll even let you be the Kat."
Kinzie: "Not gonna happen."
Playa - Female 1: "We come together... come on, your turn, Kinzie, "and you know-- it ain't fiction...""
Playa - Female 2: "We come together... Your line Kinzie, "and you know-- it ain't fiction...""
Playa - Female 3: "We come together... Go, Kinzie, go: "and you know-- it ain't fiction...""
Playa - Male 1: "We come together... now your turn, come on, "and you know... it ain't fiction..." COME ON!"
Playa - Male 2: "We come together... Ready, girl? "and you know-- it ain't fiction...""
Playa - Male 3: "We come together... You're up, Kinzie: "and you know-- it ain't fiction...""
Nolan North: "We come together... now your turn, come on, "and you know-- it ain't fiction..." COME ON! SING IT!"
Kinzie: "No."
Playa - Female 1: "Kinzie, you're gonna sing for your Commander In Chief."
Playa - Female 2: "Kinzie, your President wants you to do this."
Playa - Female 3: "That was an executive order!"
Playa - Male 1: "Kinzie, that's an order from your President."
Playa - Male 2: "Are you refusing a Presidential order?"
Playa - Male 3: "That is a direct order, Ms. Kensington."
Nolan North: "Kinzie, that's an order from your President."
Kinzie: "Fuck. That."
Playa - Female 1: "That coulda been a real bonding experience..."
Playa - Female 2: "Your lack of esprit de corps is noted, young lady."
Playa - Female 3: "See, this is why I don't let you borrow my sweaters."
Playa - Male 1: "This is why we aren't closer."
Playa - Male 2: "You just don't make an effort anymore."
Playa - Male 3: "And you wonder why I don't have you to tea anymore."
Nolan North: "See? See... this is why no one likes you."
— "Fake Sing A Long"
Playa - Female 1: "Picking up another."
Playa - Female 2: "Another is around here."
Playa - Female 3: "Found another!"
Playa - Male 1: "All right, got another."
Playa - Male 2: "Found another one."
Playa - Male 3: "Reading another cluster."
Nolan North: "All right, got another."
— "Find 2nd Cluster"
Kinzie: "This data is amazing. Incomplete, but amazing."
Playa - Female 1: "I'm afraid to ask, but how is it amazing?"
Playa - Female 2: "I fear I shall regret this, but...how is it amazing?"
Playa - Female 3: "I'll be sorry I asked, but how is it amazing?"
Playa - Male 1: "I know I'm going to regret this, but how is it amazing?"
Playa - Male 2: "*sigh* I'll bite: how is it amazing?"
Playa - Male 3: "Details, Kinzie. And try to keep 'em simple."
Nolan North: "I know I'm going to regret this, but how is it amazing?"
Kinzie: "It seems that anything that broke the normal rules of the simulation deposited loose data that can be incorporated into your programming."
Playa - Female 1: "Okay... that actually made some kind of sense."
Playa - Female 2: "Remarkable. I am following your train of thought."
Playa - Female 3: "How 'bout that? You actually made sense."
Playa - Male 1: "Hmmm, I actually kinda understand that."
Playa - Male 2: "Weird, but I actually kinda got that."
Playa - Male 3: "Strewth. I think I actually understood that."
Nolan North: "Holy shit! I actually kinda understand that. Haa..."
Kinzie: "But since the data is so fragmented it doesn't leave behind a complete subroutine to loop into your code base."
Playa - Female 1: "Nope, you lost me again."
Playa - Female 2: "Alas, we are derailed again."
Playa - Female 3: "Aw, you were doing so well for a second there."
Playa - Male 1: "Nope, never mind, you're talking gibberish again."
Playa - Male 2: "Forget it -- you're back to geek-speak."
Playa - Male 3: "Annd... back to the gibberish."
Nolan North: "Nope, never mind, you're talking gibberish again."
Kinzie: "Ugh, it's simple; the more clusters you get, the more you can upgrade and alter your abilities."
Playa - Female 1: "See, that's all you needed to say!"
Playa - Female 2: "Now we are speaking the same tongue!"
Playa - Female 3: "Now you're talking!"
Playa - Male 1: "Now we're talking the same language!"
Playa - Male 2: "Shoulda said that in the first place."
Playa - Male 3: "And Bob's your uncle!"
Nolan North: "Now we're talking the same language!"
— "2nd Drive Convo"
Playa - Female 1: "Do I need more than three of these things?"
Playa - Female 2: "Is three clusters sufficient?"
Playa - Female 3: "I got three. That enough?"
Playa - Male 1: "So, three of these enough?"
Playa - Male 2: "So, is three enough?"
Playa - Male 3: "So, will three of these suffice?"
Nolan North: "So, three of these enough?"
Kinzie: "Still missing some key fragments. Get one more and we'll see."
— "Find 3rd Cluster"
Playa - Female 1: "So if these data clumps--"
Playa - Female 2: "So if these data balls--"
Playa - Female 3: "So if these data doohickeys..."
Playa - Male 1: "So if these data thingies--"
Playa - Male 2: "So if this data stuff--"
Playa - Male 3: "So if these data biscuits--"
Nolan North: "So if these data thingies--"
Kinzie: "Ugh... Clusters."
Playa - Female 1: "Okay, clusters. If they're so useful why aren't Zinyak's people scooping them up?"
Playa - Female 2: "Oui, clusters. If they can be so useful, why are not Zinyak's people out gathering them?"
Playa - Female 3: "Clusters. Sure. If these dang cluster are so useful, why isn't Zinyak snatching 'em up??"
Playa - Male 1: "Fine, clusters. If they can be so useful then why isn't Zinyak sending his people out to collect them?"
Playa - Male 2: "Whatever. If they're so useful why isn't Zinyak collecting them?"
Playa - Male 3: "Right, clusters. If they can be so bloody useful, why does Zinyak leave 'em lying around?"
Nolan North: "Fine, clusters. If they can be so useful then why isn't Zinyak sending his people out to collect them?"
Kinzie: "Why would they need them?"
Playa - Female 1: "To make his people stronger or something? Look, you're the one who said they're "amazing"."
Playa - Female 2: "To amplify his power...? Did you not say these clusters are "amazing"?"
Playa - Female 3: "How the hell should I know? I don't know, you're the one who says they're so "amazing"."
Playa - Male 1: "To give his people a boost or something. I don't know, you're the one who says they're "amazing"."
Playa - Male 2: "To jack up his soldiers or something. Hey, you're the one who says they're the shit."
Playa - Male 3: "To give his soldiers more juice? I don't know, you said they're so "amazing"."
Nolan North: "To give his people a boost or something. I don't know, you're the one who says they're "amazing"."
Kinzie: "If Zinyak wants to change the code for his people, he can just... He WROTE the simulation."
Playa - Female 1: "But if he just leaves them lying around, then... Eh, never mind. I'll just accept this and move on."
Playa - Female 2: "But is he not concerned about... Oh, forget it. If this works, then it works."
Playa - Female 3: "But doesn't he want to keep us from... ah, you know, what? Forget it."
Playa - Male 1: "But what about keeping us from... You know what, never mind. I'm just going to accept this and move on."
Playa - Male 2: "But what about... Aw, hell, shit, never mind. I'm just gonna accept this and move on."
Playa - Male 3: "But doesn't he want to keep us from... Ah, sod it. I'll just accept this and move on."
Nolan North: "But what about keeping us from... You know what, never mind. I'm just going to accept this and move on."
Kinzie: "Probably better that way."
— "3rd Drive Convo"
Playa - Female 1: "Zinyak destroyed my apartment!"
Playa - Female 2: "Mon Dieu! Zinyak demolished my apartment!"
Playa - Female 3: "My apartment! Zinyak that's just cold."
Playa - Male 1: "Holy shit, Zinyak destroyed my apartment!"
Playa - Male 2: "What the fuck... Zinyak trashed my apartment!"
Playa - Male 3: "Holy shite, Zinyak destroyed my flat!"
Nolan North: "Holy shit, Zinyak destroyed my apartment!"
Kinzie: "That place should've been condemned a long time ago."
Playa - Female 1: "Just wish I could've saved my shoes..."
Playa - Female 2: "I thought it had..how you say? ...character?"
Playa - Female 3: "Come on, girl, that place had charm."
Playa - Male 1: "Well I always thought it had character."
Playa - Male 2: "It WAS condemned. But it was mine."
Playa - Male 3: "Well, the ladies never complained."
Nolan North: "Condemned... Ugh, it's an ugly word. It had character."
— "Arrive at Apartment"
Playa - Female 1: "This feels AMAZING!"
Playa - Female 2: "This feels MAGNIFIQUE!"
Playa - Female 3: "Lord have mercy!"
Playa - Male 1: "This feels AWESOME!"
Playa - Male 2: "This feels BADASS!"
Playa - Male 3: "This feels BRILLIANT!"
Nolan North: "This feels AWESOME!"
Kinzie: "Here, let me load up a training program for you to test your powers."
— "Buy Super Speed"
Playa - Female 1: "Okay, what do I do now?"
Playa - Female 2: "Test them how?"
Playa - Female 3: "So this is like, a training ground?"
Playa - Male 1: "What am I supposed to do in here?"
Playa - Male 2: "Whatcha got in mind?"
Playa - Male 3: "So what's this then?"
Nolan North: "What am I supposed to do in here?"
Kinzie: "The code says you can jump long distances and run at super high speeds. How about starting with a small jump?"
— "Begin Training Sequence"
Playa - Female 1: "How do think I'm gonna jump up that?"
Playa - Female 2: "How am I expected to jump up that?"
Playa - Female 3: "Now how am I supposed to jump up that?"
Playa - Male 1: "How the hell am I supposed to jump up that?"
Playa - Male 2: "How you expect me to jump up that?"
Playa - Male 3: "How exactly am I supposed to jump up that?"
Nolan North: "How the hell am I supposed to jump up that?"
Kinzie: "Try pushing off from the wall each jump."
Playa - Female 1: "So I can climb walls now?"
Playa - Female 2: "You expect me to climb the walls?"
Playa - Female 3: "You sayin' I can climb walls?"
Playa - Male 1: "I can climb walls?"
Playa - Male 2: "You saying I can climb walls now?"
Playa - Male 3: "So I just run up walls now, do I?"
Nolan North: "I can climb walls?"
Kinzie: "It'd be more accurate to say you can jump up them repeatedly."
Playa - Female 1: "That's what I said."
Playa - Female 2: "No difference."
Playa - Female 3: "Ain't that the same thing?"
Playa - Male 1: "Same difference."
Playa - Male 2: "Same thing."
Playa - Male 3: "Pretty much the same thing."
Nolan North: "Same difference."
— "Wall Jump Training"
Playa - Female 1: "Whooo!"
Playa - Female 2: "C'est bon!"
Playa - Female 3: "Woo hoo!"
Playa - Male 1: "Whoa!"
Playa - Male 2: "Oooh shit, son!"
Playa - Male 3: "Crikey!"
Nolan North: "Whoa!"
— "First Big Jump"
Kinzie: "This time I've moved the buildings apart. Try making that jump."
Playa: "I'm liking this."
— "Small Jump With Fall"
Kinzie: "Okay, now for the big test. Use your super speed to get a running start and leap to that opposite building."
Playa - Female 1: "You've gotta be joking."
Playa - Female 2: "You've gotta be joking."
Playa - Female 3: "Oh no way. You've gotta be joking."
Playa - Male 1: "You've gotta be joking."
Playa - Male 2: "You've gotta be joking."
Playa - Male 3: "You've gotta be fucking joking."
Nolan North: "Come on, you've gotta be joking."
Kinzie: "Just try it."
— "Long Jump"
Playa - Female 1: "Nice, but I wanna go bigger with this."
Playa - Female 2: "Wonderful, but I desire a greater challenge."
Playa - Female 3: "Let's find something a little more... exhilarating."
Playa - Male 1: "Fun, but I want something more challenging."
Playa - Male 2: "Cool, but I want a real challenge now."
Playa - Male 3: "Fun, but we can do better."
Nolan North: "Yeah, that was fun, but I want something more challenging."
Kinzie: "Good, cause I found a race subroutine already in the city."
Playa - Female 1: "Let's do it."
Playa - Female 2: "Let's waste no time."
Playa - Female 3: "Hell yes."
Playa - Male 1: "Perfect."
Playa - Male 2: "Hell, yeah."
Playa - Male 3: "Spot on."
Nolan North: "Perfect."
— "Exit Training Room"
Playa - Female 1: "Should I be worried about who set this race up?"
Playa - Female 2: "So where did this all come from?"
Playa - Female 3: "Why would Zinyak set this up?"
Playa - Male 1: "What's all this stuff here, anyway?"
Playa - Male 2: "So who set up this race?"
Playa - Male 3: "How's this race tied to the simulation?"
Nolan North: "Why's all this stuff here, anyway?"
Kinzie: "Dunno, but it seems that when you break through any checkpoints along the race, the district's reality matrix will overload a little."
Playa - Female 1: "One more time, Kinzie."
Playa - Female 2: "Forgive me Kinzie, I don't understand your nerd shit."
Playa - Female 3: "Yeah, I don't know what you just said."
Playa - Male 1: "And that means something to me?"
Playa - Male 2: "Let's try that again in English."
Playa - Male 3: "You lost me."
Nolan North: "And that means something to me?"
Kinzie: "It means the simulation doesn't like it, and we're able to control the area."
Playa - Female 1: "Hey, that actually makes sense."
Playa - Female 2: "Ah. Makes sense."
Playa - Female 3: "That sounds pretty straightforward..."
Playa - Male 1: "Sounds simple enough."
Playa - Male 2: "Wow. That almost sounded logical."
Playa - Male 3: "Hey, that time it made sense!"
Nolan North: "Sounds simple enough."
Kinzie: "It did the first time I said it too."
Playa - Female 1: "Keep saying shit that I understand and I'll buy you a pony."
Playa - Female 2: "See? We're totally sympatico..."
Playa - Female 3: "Look at that, Kinzie...we're bonding..."
Playa - Male 1: "You know I love you, Kinzie."
Playa - Male 2: "I kid 'cause I love."
Playa - Male 3: "Love you too, Kinzie."
Nolan North: "You know I love you, Kinzie."
Kinzie: "Lies."
— "Activity Start"
Playa - Female 1: "This is amazing!"
Playa - Female 2: "Incredible!"
Playa - Female 3: "WOOOOO!"
Playa - Male 1: "Holy crap I'm fast!"
Playa - Male 2: "Whoa!"
Playa - Male 3: "Yeah!"
Nolan North: "Holy crap I'm fast!"
Kinzie: "You're not kidding."
— "Begin Running"
Kinzie: "Checkpoint down."
Kinzie: "God, the speeds you're reaching are incredible!"
Kinzie: "Good, now keep going."
Kinzie: "Heh, the simulation didn't like that at all."
Kinzie: "That's right, keep up the pace."
— "Checkpoint"
Benjamin King
Warren Williams: "If you hadn't wasted our time stickin' your nose up them white boys' asses, we coulda owned the whole damn game by now."
Benjamin King: "I've told you before, we ain't gettin' into that shit."
Warren Williams: "And why the fuck not? That's where the money is! Man, if you got down with that shit back in the day, the Carnales woulda been ghosts right now. But ya didn't, did ya? You were too much of a pussy then, and you're to much of a pussy now."
— Benjamin King and Warren Williams in the We Need to Talk cutscene
Warren Williams: "So what do we do now?"
Benjamin King: "We wait."
Warren Williams: "Hold on, dawg, that muthafucka is still out there. The fuck you mean, we wait?"
Benjamin King: "I mean, you're gonna sit your black ass down and wait cause I fuckin' said so. Don't worry 'bout the one that got away, the 5-0 will take care of him."
Warren Williams: "Oh, so while you loungin', Tre Street keeps jackin' us. That's great, that's... that's fuckin' brilliant."
Benjamin King: "Slow up, little n​igga."
Warren Williams and King, after Anthony Green captures Johnny Gat.[7]
Warren Williams: "You've been puttin' yourself before the crew..."
Benjamin King: "Keep talkin', little n​igga..."
— Warren Williams and King, just before Warren starts his coup.[8]
Julius: "You got a choice. You can keep your fuckin' pride and die right now, or you can be a man and walk away."
Benjamin King: "When did you get the balls, Jules?"
Julius: "What's it gonna be?"
Benjamin King: "I ain't walkin' away."
Julius: "Fair enough. Johnny."
Benjamin King: "I ain't walkin' away until I deal with Tanya."
Julius: "My n​igga."
Julius and King, discussing the latter's future.[9]
Johnny Gat: "I've been chattin' with King, and it looks like Tanya's takeover didn't sit well with everybody. The Vice Kings are fighting amongst themselves; now's the time to take 'em out for good. King said he was gonna come along, I hope he hasn't gone soft."
Benjamin King: "Don't ever worry 'bout me, baby-boy, cause I'm gonna handle mine."
Johnny Gat: "All I'm sayin' is that since you got here you've been nothin' but talk."
Benjamin King: "I've smoked dozens of fools before. I ain't addin' to the count unless I have to."
Johnny Gat: "That's just fuckin' great."
Benjamin King: "I said don't worry about it."
Johnny Gat: "I don't want you bitchin' out when you see your crew."
Benjamin King: "Ain't my crew, son. That's why I'm here, remember? So how 'bout you put your dick away, pick up your gun, and try to keep your knee away from the bullets."
— Johnny Gat and King, before they head off to kill Tanya Winters and end the Vice Kings.[10]
Stefan: "You and your friend with the awful hair will release Stefan at once!"
Benjamin King: "Your bitch ass better stop talking in the third person or I'm gonna drop you on principle..."
Stefan and King, as the latter interrogates the former by dangling him out of a car window.[10]
Benjamin King: "Okay, there it is. The first thing we gotta do is clear a path to the elevator."
Johnny Gat: "What then?"
Benjamin King: "Then we kill Tanya."
Johnny Gat: "My kind of plan."
— King and Johnny Gat, as they and Playa near Tanya.[10]
Best Laid Plans...
Johnny Gat: "Tanya lucked out the last time you took out her brothel... this time the bitch is gonna get what's commin' to her..."
Johnny Gat: "After we're through with this whore I wanna find Big Tony... you listen to Julius talk about the guy and he makes it sound like he's built like a fuckin' APC... I'm lookin' forward to takin' him apart."
Johnny Gat: "I got a good feeling about this... I think it'll be a nice bonding experience..."
Johnny Gat: "I hope you can keep up with me in there."
Johnny Gat: "Let's hurry up, we don't want to miss the fun."
— Johnny Gat, after entering a vehicle before reaching the abandoned police station
Johnny Gat: "Hey, I can't kill anyone if I'm dead!"
Johnny Gat: "This is a car, not some bitch who forgot the safe word."
Johnny Gat: "Did you see that fucker bounce?"
Johnny Gat: "Let's save some of that for the station, k?"
Johnny Gat: "Slow down man, we'll get that bitch soon enough.."
Johnny Gat: "Would you mind not runnin into me?"
Johnny Gat: "Watch it, I'm jumpy enough as it is."
Johnny Gat: "What's your problem man?"
— Johnny Gat's random lines when The Protagonist drives poorly
Johnny Gat: "Come on muthafuckas, you can do better than that!"
Johnny Gat: "Don't stop now, we got more killin' to do."
Johnny Gat: "Don't let that bitch get away!"
Johnny Gat: "Fuck yeah!"
Johnny Gat: "Get up so I can shoot you again!"
Johnny Gat: "This shit is too easy."
Johnny Gat: "Ya hear that Tanya? I'm gettin' closer."
Johnny Gat: "Step on up boys and girls, everyone gets a turn."
Johnny Gat: "When are you bitches gonna get the message, stay out of Stillwater![sic] "
Johnny Gat: "We're gonna take this place, just like we took the ho house!"
Johnny Gat: "The Saints are through bein' pushed around!"
Johnny Gat: "I'm sending all you fuckers home in a box!"
Johnny Gat: "It's been too long."
Johnny Gat: "I could do this all night."
Johnny Gat: "Tanya, we're getting closer..."
Johnny Gat: "Anyone else think they're hard?"
Johnny Gat: "Who's next?"
Johnny Gat: "What, that's it?"
Johnny Gat: "Bitch, you just bled on my shoes."
— Johnny Gat's random lines when attacking
Johnny Gat: "Oh, I like it when they play hard to get."
Johnny Gat: "I'm fine, keep moving."
Johnny Gat: "You think a couple bullets are gonna stop me?!"
Johnny Gat: "Mother fucker!"
Johnny Gat: "Hey man, are you gonna cover me or what?"
Johnny Gat: "A little help here would be nice!"
Johnny Gat: "Oh, I'm gonna take my time with you."
Johnny Gat: "Bitch, your day is about to get a whole lot worse."
Johnny Gat: "You couldn't take me out on your best day."
Johnny Gat: "This is what Tanya's got for protection? That girl is fucked."
Johnny Gat: "A swing like that, you wouldn't last five minutes in the Row."
Johnny Gat: "Motherfucker just hit me."
Johnny Gat: "See, that's just gonna piss me off."
Johnny Gat: "Becareful, somebody's gonna get hurt..."
Johnny Gat: "Fuck it, I'll finish this myself."
Johnny Gat: "You think you can take me on?"
Johnny Gat: "You don't cut that shit out, I'll put you down myself."
Johnny Gat: "I'm running out of patience."
— Johnny Gat's random lines when taking damage
Johnny Gat: "Man, I love your work."
Johnny Gat: "Not too shabby."
Johnny Gat: "Ya know, we should really do this more often."
Johnny Gat: "You don't fuck around, do ya?"
— Johnny Gat's random lines when The Protagonist kills Vice Kings
Johnny Gat: "Shit!"
Johnny Gat: "Incoming!"
Johnny Gat: "Clear out!"
Johnny Gat: "Fuck us!"
— Johnny Gat's random lines if a Hand Grenade is thrown
Johnny Gat: "Buddy, when this thing's loaded, you're dead."
Johnny Gat: "I ain't runnin' out anytime soon."
Johnny Gat: "You're luck's about to run out..."
Johnny Gat: "You can't hold out forever..."
— Johnny Gat's random lines when reloading
Johnny Gat: "We better get movin' or Tanya's gonna get away again."
Johnny Gat: "I didn't bring this gun along for show, let's get moving."
— Johnny Gat's unused lines about standing around idle
Johnny Gat: "Where ya think you're going?"
Johnny Gat: "Come on, who am I fighting, a Vice King or a ho?"
— Johnny Gat's unused lines when an enemy, possibly Tanya, flees
Tanya Winters: "How 'bout you drop the gun, honey?"
Anthony Green: "If I were you, I'd listen to the lady."
Johnny Gat: "Well of course you would, you bein' her bitch."
Anthony Green: "Watch your fuckin' mouth."
Johnny Gat: "Hey, no reason to be hostile."
Gat drops gun, and Green searches him, throwing Gat's VICE 9 to Tanya
Tanya Winters: "He packin' anything else?"
Johnny Gat: "Just some rubbers, I was hopin' I could get some of Williams' sloppy seconds."
Green hits Gat over the head with his gun and Gat falls to the floor
Johnny Gat: "Guess I hit a nerve."
Anthony Green: "Do yourself a favor, stay down and shut the fuck up. You 3rd Street mothafuckas think you so smart. Well check this out, we ain't impressed. Hell, the only reason you got as far as you did was 'cause King let you. We led you right to where we wanted you, and now the police are gonna finish your ass for good, just the way we planned."
Johnny Gat: "Well, that explains how your bitch lost Prawn Court."
Tanya Winters: "Are you gonna let him talk about me like--"
Anthony Green: "Don't worry baby, I got this."
Johnny Gat: "Yeah Tanya, shut the fuck up."
Anthony Green: "I thought I told you to be quiet."
Johnny Gat: "I got shitty hearing."
Green shoots Gat in the leg.
Johnny Gat: "(screams in pain)"
Anthony Green: "Now you got a shitty leg."
Gat pulls out a knife and stabs Green in the foot
Anthony Green: "(screams in pain)"
Johnny Gat: "So do you."
Gat and Green start fighting, and The Protagonist gets to his feet
Johnny Gat: "GO NOW!"
The Protagonist jumps out the window
Tanya Winters: "Baby, we better call King."
Tanya and Tony full CUTSCENES 0232
— "Tanya and Tony" cutscene
Anthony Green: "Trust me, he ain't goin' nowhere."
Benjamin King: "Damn good work, Tony. I'll stop by after I pay a visit to Hughes."
Anthony Green: "I'll see you soon boss."
Warren Williams: "So what do we do now?"
Benjamin King: "We wait."
Warren Williams: "Hold on, dawg, that muthafucka is still out there. The fuck you mean, we wait?"
Benjamin King: "I mean, you're gonna sit your black ass down and wait cause I fuckin' said so. Don't worry 'bout the one that got away, the 5-0 will take care of him."
Warren Williams: "Oh, so while you loungin', Tre Street keeps jackin' us. That's great, that's... that's fuckin' brilliant."
Benjamin King: "Slow up, little n​igga."
Warren Williams: "Come on, King, this is some bullshit. Let me get a crew together. I could roll into the Row and drop all them bitches. I'm tellin' you--"
Benjamin King: "No."
Warren Williams: "But Mr. King--"
Benjamin King: "I said no. Don't make me say it a third time. Warren my man, you got the music scene locked down. I need you to bring in the chedder, not get shot 'cause you think you got somethin' to prove."
Warren Williams: "I can do this!"
Benjamin King: "Maybe, but we ain't gonna find out. We got the cops bustin' up 3rd Street for us, and we got Julius' lieutenant tied up in Anthony's condo. Everything's goin' our way right now, so just chill. Your time gonna come, Warren. It just ain't happenin' now."
Benjamin King: "Understood?"
Warren Williams: "Yeah; we straight."
The Generation Gap full CUTSCENES 0236
— "The Generation Gap" cutscene
Bleeding Out
Aisha is tied to a chair. Jyunichi is sitting across from her.
Jyunichi: "I don't take much pleasure in this."
Aisha: "Then let me go."
Jyunichi: "That depends on you..."
Outside, Johnny Gat and Playa are walking towards Aisha's house.
Playa: "Aisha doesn't care that I'm stoppin' by does she?"
Johnny Gat: "Fuck no, Aisha doesn't go out much ...she loves company."
Back inside, Aisha looks at Jyunichi, fear in her eyes
Aisha: "You're going to kill me, aren't you?"
Jyunichi: "If you're calm, help us find the money, and do what I say... I give you my word you will live."
Outside, Johnny notices Aisha's door is ajar. He quickly pulls a pistol and approaches the door, followed by Playa. He slowly pushes his way inside.
Johnny Gat: "Eesh, you home?"
Jyunichi signals to Aisha to be quiet, and signals the Ronin in him to get into ambush position. He slowly draws one of his katana. Aisha looks at the katana, then makes a decision and shouts a warning.
Aisha: "Johnny it's a tr-"
Jyunichi instantly turns around and kills her. The flowers that were cut from the strike, fall to the ground
Johnny Gat: "Eesh!"
Johnny is disarmed by a Ronin, but Gat punches his neck as he suffocates, stabs him with his own sword and starts a sword battle with Jyunichi while Playa shoots the other Ronin members. One of which, sees Johnny and aims at him, but Jyunichi disarms him with his other sword.
Jyunichi (subtitle): "*speaks Japanese*"
Jyunichi (audio): "俺のだ!"
Jyunichi (translation: "He's mine!"
Gat and Jyunichi keep sword fighting as Playa shoots the remaining Ronin and sees Gat.
Jyunichi: "*screams*"
Playa: "Gat, get outta the way!"
Jyunichi stabs Gat, who had been distracted by Playa, then smiles smugly. Playa tries to fire, but finds that the gun is empty as Gat soon slams both of his hands onto Jyunichi's head, causing the latter to let go of the sword and run as Playa reloads and fires at him.
Johnny Gat: "Get back here!"
Gat removes the sword but collapses and Playa pulls out his phone.
Johnny Gat: "Yells aggressively"
Playa: "We gotta get you to a hospital..."
— "House Party" cutscene
Playa (Male Voice 1): "What's takin' that ambulance so long..."
Playa (Male Voice 2): "Where the hell's the ambulance?"
Playa (Male Voice 3): "I don't got time to wait for this ambulance..."
Playa (Female Voice 1): "Where the hell is that ambulance?"
Playa (Female Voice 2): "Why isn't that amulance here..."
Playa (Female Voice 3): "Why hasn't that ambulance gotten here?"
— First wave
'Playa (Male Voice 1): "Johnny's hurt, I need a pickup now..."
Playa (Male Voice 2): "Gat's been stabbed, we need a ride to the hospital..."
Playa (Male Voice 3): "Hey the ambulance for Gat isn't comin', I need a ride to the hospital..."
Playa (Female Voice 1): "Gat's in bad shape we need to get to the hospital..."
Playa (Female Voice 2): "Listen up, Gat's down I need a ride to the hospital..."
Playa (Female Voice 3): "We don't have time to wait to the ambulance, get over here and give Gat and me a pick up..."
3rd Street Saints gang member: "Hang tight, I'm comin"
— Playa calls for help
Johnny Gat: "Eesh..."
Playa (Male Voice 1): "You're gonna be fine Johnny..."
Playa (Male Voice 2): "Hang in there Gat."
Playa (Male Voice 3): "Don't worry buddy, we're going to get you to the hospital..."
Playa (Female Voice 1): "We're gonna take care of you Johnny..."
Playa (Female Voice 2): "You're gonna be fine Johnny..."
Playa (Female Voice 3): "Stay with me Gat..."
3rd Street Saints gang member: "Man, he's not looking good..."
Playa (Male Voice 1): "No shit, just get us to the hospital..."
Playa (Male Voice 2): "Just get us to the goddamn hospital..."
Playa (Male Voice 3): "We gotta hurry..."
Playa (Female Voice 1): "We gotta hurry..."
Playa (Female Voice 2): "I didn't realize you were a doctor, just shut up and drive..."
Playa (Female Voice 3): "Go faster."
— Gat delirious
Playa (Male Voice 1): "Nice drivin'..."
Playa (Male Voice 2): "Good job, I'm givin' you a raise..."
Playa (Male Voice 3): "Thanks, I'll take him inside..."
Playa (Female Voice 1): "Thanks for the ride, I appreciate it."
Playa (Female Voice 2): "Thanks for the ride, I'll buy you drinks later..."
Playa (Female Voice 3): "I'll bring him in, thanks for your help."
— After arriving at the Hospital
Playa (Male Voice 1): "My friend's hurt bad, if you don't get an ambulance out here soon he's dead...whaddaya mean you're "too busy" get a damn amblance out here now!"
Playa (Male Voice 2): "Listen, I need an ambulance right away, my boy was ran through with a katana...no this ain't a fuckin' joke, my boy's bleedin' to death."
Playa (Male Voice 3): "Hello, 911? My friend's hurt really bad we need an ambulance...he's bleeding out on the sidewalk, we don't have that kind of time, hurry!"
Playa (Female Voice 1): "911? Listen we need an ambulance sent out to-no you can't put me on hold, my friend's dying here. Hello...Hello? Sonofabitch!"
Playa (Female Voice 2): "911? There's been an accident we need an ambulance...no I didn't shoot my husband what sort of dumbass question is that? Now get the damn ambulance out here..."
Playa (Female Voice 3): "Listen, we need an ambulance sent out here immediately...I don't care if all your EMTs are responding to other calls, let some old guy die and save my friend!"
— Playa calls for an Ambulance
Playa: "Johnny, you're gonna be fine."
Johnny Gat: "I gotta save Eesh..."
Playa calls Pierce
Playa: "Pierce, listen up...Johnny got laid out by one of the Ronin."
Pierce: "That mean I get a promotion?"
Playa: "Don't get too excited asshole, Gat will back up in no time."
Pierce: "Yo, that came out wrong..."
Playa: "Just shut up and listen. Gat was looking into a Japanese crime boss called Akuji. This guy's comin' into town soon and I wanna know when."
Pierce: "Got it."
Playa: "Don't fuck this up Pierce, I'm not in a good mood."
— "That Which Does Not Kill You..." cutscene
Bonding Experience
Pierce: "I can't take all this sittin' around, when you gonna let me come out and do some dirt with you?"
Playa: "Don't take it the wrong way Pierce; I'm just used to dealin' with shit myself..."
Shaundi: "Heads up Pierce!"
Pierce knocks the Hacky Sack out the way
Shaundi: "Come on!"
Pierce: "Sorry girl, no self respecting brotha plays hacky-sack. Why you got the cheerleader callin' the shots and not me?"
Shaundi: "Right here..."
Playa: "Pierce, I put you in charge of the Ronin what more do you want?"
Pierce: "I can do more to help."
Playa: "Do you know how the Sons of Samedi are still movin' product after we torched their farm and drug labs?"
Pierce: "No."
Playa: "Then shut the fuck up."
Pierce: "Why you gotta be like that?"
Playa: "I'm just sayin'; don't bitch unless you got a solution."
Shaundi: "Ummmm guys..."
Pierce: "My solution is to do more than wait around for one of the 600 guys Shaundi used to fuck to give us a call."
Shaundi: "There's a bunch of helicopters dropping cargo over Samedi territory."
Pierce: "How the hell you know that?"
Shaundi raises her phone
Pierce: "You gotta be fuckin' kiddin' me."
Playa: "Tell ya what Pierce, if you wanna watch me blow up some helicopters you're more than welcome."
— "Operation Voodoo Drop" cutscene
Pierce: "About time you took me along..."
Playa: "Pierce."
Pierce: "No I'm serious. I'm always on time, I always listen, I always pay attention."
Playa: "Pierce. Helicopters."
Pierce: "I know we're looking for helicopters! I told you, I got this!"
Playa (Male Voice 1): "No Pierce, the goddamn helicopters are here!"
Playa (Male Voice 2): "The fucking helicopters are here Pierce!"
Playa (Male Voice 3): "No. Pierce. The helicopters are here!"
Playa (Female Voice 1): "Pierce. The Helicopters are here!"
Playa (Female Voice 2): "Pierce! Helicopters!"
Playa (Female Voice 3): "*speaks Spanish*"
Pierce: "Shit!"
— Mission start
Pierce: "Shit, they're flying over the water..."
Playa (Male Voice 1): "Stop the car, we're takin' a boat..."
Playa (Male Voice 2): "Pull over, we'll take a boat..."
Playa (Male Voice 3): "Shit, we're gonna need a boat..."
Playa (Female Voice 1): "Let's get a boat, we'll take 'em out over the water..."
Playa (Female Voice 2): "We're gonna need a bigger boat..."
Playa (Female Voice 3): "If we're hitting that helicopter we're gonna need a boat..."
— After destroying two helicopters
Playa (Male Voice 1): "Let's ditch this thing, we gotta get back on land..."
Playa (Male Voice 2): "Ditch the boat. We gotta get back on shore and grab a ride."
Playa (Male Voice 3): "Let's get to shore, we gotta get those other helicopters..."
Playa (Female Voice 1): "We're done here, let's get on shore and finish this..."
Playa (Female Voice 2): "That's it for those choppers, let's get to land and finish this..."
Playa (Female Voice 3): "We've done all we can here, let's get to shore..."
— After destroying two helicopters from the boat
Pierce changes the radio to Ne-Yo's "So Sick"
Pierce: "Now this what we need...some driveby music..."
Playa (Male Voice 1): "Pierce...what the hell are we listening to?"
Playa (Male Voice 2): "Are you shitting me?"
Playa (Male Voice 3): "We gotta get you better taste in music bro..."
Playa (Female Voice 1): "OK you're never talkin' shit about my music again..."
Playa (Female Voice 2): "Is this the softer side of Pierce?"
Playa (Female Voice 3): "You seriously listen to this?"
Pierce: "<Sings along>"
Playa (Male Voice 1): "Oh God..."
Playa (Male Voice 2): "Son, you're no Ne-Yo."
Playa (Male Voice 3): "This is worse than getting shot..."
Playa (Female Voice 1): "You're killing me Pierce."
Playa (Female Voice 2): "Wow..."
Playa (Female Voice 3): "*speaks Spanish*"
Pierce: "The helicopter's almost at the dropoff.."
Pierce: "We gotta take that helicopter out soon..."
Pierce: "If we don't shoot down that chopper it'll drop off the dust..."
— Labelled "Heli Range"
Pierce: "There's another helicopter!"
Pierce: "Chopper's over there!"
Pierce: "We got another helicopter!"
Pierce: "Another chopper is comin'!"
— Labelled "Next Heli"
The General: "You know why I am here."
Mr. Sunshine: "I do."
The General cuts off Mr. Sunshine's left ear
The General: "I took no pleasure in this, my friend...but a price needed to be paid for failure."
Mr. Sunshine: "Don't worry. I only need one ear to hear the whispers of the Loa..."
The General: "I know that you will fix this."
Mr. Sunshine: "Of course General, do not worry."
— "Spare the Rod..." cutscene
Break on Through
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Great. Listening to the creepy blocked caller could never go bad..."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "As a rule I'm not a fan of disembodied voices..."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "That was just bizzare..."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "That was odd..."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "We can all agree that was fucked up, right?"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "This should be interesting..."
Nolan North: "That was odd..."
Kinzie: "No kidding. Does this guy really think we would just trust some random ghost in the machine?"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "We don't have much of a choice...fuck it, what's the worse that can happen."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "We're not really in a position to turn down help...what could go wrong?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "If there's a chance that this guy can help save our friends it's worth the risk...what's the worse that can happen?"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Well, if he can help it'd be worth it, right? Besides, what's the worse that can happen?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "If this guy has a line on our friends, we have to check it out. Besides, what's the worse that can happen?"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Well if it's a trap what's the worse than can happen?"
Nolan North: "Well, if he can help it'd be worth it, right? Besides, what's the worse that can happen?"
Kinzie: "I die. You die. We all die. Any combination that involves death at all really."
— "Heading to Rift"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "If you don't start telling me how you can help me save my friends I'm walking."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Don't waste my time: how can you help me get my friends..."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "I want my friends back...how can you help?"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Look, I showed up to your "rift", so start explaining how you'll get me to my friends."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "All right I'm here...now tell me how you can help me find my friends..."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "I'm not doing shit until you tell me how you can help my friends."
Nolan North: "Look, I showed up to your "rift", so start explaining how you'll get me to my friends."
CID: "I know how to navigate the Zin systems and travel between them. If you can find the right simulation, I can open a gateway between that one and yours."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Why would you want to help me... You don't even know me."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Why should I trust you?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "What's your stake in all this? Why are you helpin' me?"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "How do I know you aren't just one of Zinyak's goons fucking with me?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "I know you're not doing this out of the kindness of your heart...why are you helping me."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "That's real convienent. Why should I trust you?"
Nolan North: "How do I know you aren't just one of Zinyak's goons fucking with me?"
CID: "Because I have no love for the Zin as I was once their prisoner too. I have been stuck inside the Zin simulations creating rifts which cause chaos for Zinyak, though the Zin inevitably shut them down."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Looks like you already got this covered, what do you need me for?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "If you can open rifts, why do you need me?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "You seem to be doin' fine on your own...why do you need me?"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Then why am I here doing this?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "What do you want from me?"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "So what, you want me to be your errand boy?"
Nolan North: "Then why am I here doing this?"
CID: "Your help ensures I am able to keep them open permanently. A benefit to us both."
— "Begin Activity"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "This doesn't seem dangerous, why don't you do it yourself?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "So why do you need my help?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Can't you do this yourself?"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "So why don't you do this yourself? Where are you anyway?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "So why aren't you doing this yourself?"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Couldn't you have done this on your own?"
Nolan North: "So why don't you do this yourself? Where are you anyway?"
CID: "My body has long since died. I implanted my consciousness into the main simulation computer many years ago."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "How can you open a gateway if you're dead?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "So how do plan on helping me without a body?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "So even though you're dead you can still open these gateways?"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Then how can you open these gateways for me?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "If you don't have a body, the fuck are you gonna help me?"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "But even though you have no body you're still going to help me, right?"
Nolan North: "Then how can you open these gateways for me?"
CID: "I cannot. That is, not unless you find me a physical, mobile form I can download my memory matrix into first."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "What, I just take your word for it?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "So I find you a body and I'm supposed to just trust that you'll help me?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "So I'm just supposed to trust you?"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "So I find you a body and I'm supposed to just trust that you'll help me?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "There's always a catch..."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "That sounds like a lot of work for a vague promise..."
Nolan North: "So I find you a body and I'm supposed to just trust that you'll help me?"
CID: "Unlike humans I keep my word and pay my debts. Besides, you know you need me."
— "Complete"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "I jumped on the flashy lights, now can you help me kill Zinyak already?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Done."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "I did my part...now it's your turn..."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "There, I've finished your rift."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "I jumped through your hoops...what's next."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "What's next?"
Nolan North: "There, I've finished your rift."
CID: "My access code is 1 3 3 1. Use it when you find me a suitable form."
— "End"
Brotherhood
Pierce: "Hey boss, I got a tip on one of Zinyak's guys starting shit within the simulation. Let's get together and take 'em out. What'dya say?"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Okay, I'm game."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Why not?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Let's saddle up."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Sure thing, Pierce."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Works for me."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "I'm always up for a fight."
Nolan North: "Sure thing, Pierce."
— "Start Phonecall"
Pierce: "So here's the plan: We-- What the hell!"
Shaundi SR2: "All right, you two go in and-- Hey!"
Pierce: "Dammit girl, my mission, my call. There's a shipment of trucks being unloaded at the docks. That's what we hit first to start drawing out Zinyak's guy."
— "Mission Briefing"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Sounds good. Race you to the docks?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "You want to meet up at the docks?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "So I'll meet you at the docks in a few minutes?"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "All right, you wanna meet me at the docks?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Okay then, meet me at the docks."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "I'll run, you drive, we'll see who gets there first?"
Nolan North: "All right, you wanna meet me at the docks?"
Pierce: "No. Get in, I'm driving."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "It may be your mission, but I'm driving, Pierce."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "No, Pierce, I'd rather get there in one piece."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "I'm fine with it being your mission, but I am definitely behind the wheel."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "It may be your mission, but I'm driving, Pierce."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "It may be your mission, but I'm driving, Pierce."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Not a chance. We can go together, but I drive."
Nolan North: "It may be your mission, but I'm driving, Pierce."
Pierce: "Fine, but I control the radio."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Okay, but no dubstep."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "That is acceptable, monsieur Washington."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Deal."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Sure thing, Mr. Washington."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "If you must."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Sure, why not?"
Nolan North: "Sure thing, Mr. Washington."
— "Mission Start"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "You said there's a shipment of trucks. What's Zinyak need with trucks?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "And why does Zinyak require trucks?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "I have to say, trucks are an odd thing for someone like Zinyak to care about."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "So what does Zinyak need with trucks?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "So why does Zinyak need trucks?"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "So these lorries, they loaded with something Zinyak needs?"
Nolan North: "So what does Zinyak need with trucks?"
Pierce: "Oh they ain't for Zinyak."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Then how's this gonna piss him off?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Then why will this matter to him?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Then how's this gonna piss him off?"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Then how's this gonna piss him off?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Then how's this gonna piss him off?"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Then how's this meant to cause him grief?"
Nolan North: "Then how's this gonna piss him off?"
Pierce: "Oh it won't. It'll piss off who they're for."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Why do I feel like we're talking in circles?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "*sigh* This is getting tedious."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Am I gonna get any straight answers?"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "And who're they for?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "You wanna tell me who that is?"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "And who're they for?"
Nolan North: "And who're they for?"
Pierce: "Look, all we need to do is to get to the docks and destroy all the trucks. Think you can do that?"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "So you gonna turn on that radio, or what?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Very well. How about that music?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Well, at least play a girl some driving music."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "All right, then how about a little driving music?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "A little driving music might help."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Maybe I would if you'd switch on that radio."
Nolan North: "All right, then how about a little driving music?"
Pierce: "Ha, I thought you'd never ask."
— "To Trucks Convo"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Okay, why is the Brotherhood here, Pierce?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Pierce, those trucks...that is The Brotherhood, no?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Pierce, you didn't say the trucks belonged to the Brotherhood."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "What the hell is The Brotherhood doing here?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "The Brotherhood?! The hell are they doing here?"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Wait, don't those trucks belong to The Brotherhood?"
Nolan North: "What the hell is The Brotherhood doing here?"
Pierce: "You really surprised? Zinyak's pullin' out all the old gangs from our past."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Yeah, I guess he is. You figure Donnie's out there, too?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Then I suppose the monster trucks are in context. You don't suppose Donnie's in here...?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Okay, that explains the monster trucks. You don't suppose Donnie's here, do you?"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "I guess the monster trucks make sense then. Jesus, you think Donnie's around?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Okay then. Hey, if he brought in the Brotherhood, you think Donnie's with them?"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Makes sense, now that you mention it. Does this mean we can expect to run into Donnie?"
Nolan North: "Guess the monster trucks make sense then. Jesus, you think Donnie's around?"
Pierce: "Oh I highly doubt that."
— "Destroy Trucks Convo"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "That takes care of the trucks."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "I think we got them all."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "All done."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "That's the last one."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "That's the last of 'em."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Well, I'm out of trucks."
Nolan North: "That's the last one."
Pierce: "All right, let's get going. Back in the car?"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "I'm still not letting you drive."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Oui. Passenger side for you."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Yeah, but I'm still driving."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "I'm still driving though."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Sure, but I'm not giving up the keys."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Long as I'm behind the wheel."
Nolan North: "I'm still driving though."
Pierce: "Good, then we can listen to some more music on the way?"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Aw, what the hell..."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "If you insist."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Strike it up."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Ha ha! You know me so well."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Let's do it."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "By all means."
Nolan North: "You know me so well."
— "Trucks Destroyed"
Zinyak: "Ugh! Philistines!"
Pierce: "Oh hell no..."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Zinyak fucked up Biz Markie..."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Zinyak butchered Biz Markie..."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "I can't un-hear Zinyak now..."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Zinyak fucked with Biz Markie..."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Zinyak stepped on Biz Markie..."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Zinyak ruined Biz Markie..."
Nolan North: "Zinyak fucked with Biz Markie..."
Pierce: "Man, I can't wait to kill that bitch."
— "2nd Singalong End"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "So why'd we head to the Nuke Plant?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Are we looking for someone here?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "I hope this Nuke Plant has something important."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "So why're we at the Nuke Plant?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "There a good reason we're at the Nuke Plant?"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "And why're we at the Nuke Plant?"
Nolan North: "So why're we at the Nuke Plant?"
Pierce: "We're lookin' for some nuclear waste."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Pierce, what are you up to?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "What in the world for?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Why in God's name do we need that?"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "What the hell for?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Pierce, what are you thinking?"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "What on earth for?"
Nolan North: "What the hell for?"
Pierce: "Damn, they already boxed up the stuff. Hey, start checkin' the crates."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Seriously?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "If you say so..."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "I don't know..."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Yeah, but..."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Huh?"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "What?"
Nolan North: "But..."
Pierce: "Come on, start checking!"
— "Arrive Nuke Plant"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Nope."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Not here."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Nope."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Nope."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Nope."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Still not finding anything."
Nolan North: "Nope."
— "2nd Crate Empty"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Nothing. What if it's not here?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Nothing. Are you positive it's here?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Nothing. You sure it's here?"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Nothing. You sure it's here?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Nothing. Maybe it's not here, Pierce."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Nothing. You quite certain it's here?"
Nolan North: "Nothing. You sure it's here?"
Pierce: "It's gotta be. Maybe on the other side of the building."
— "3rd Crate Empty"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Found it."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Eureka."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Bingo."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "There, got it."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Finally."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Here we go."
Nolan North: "There, got it."
Pierce: "Great! Part two complete. Now to follow the guy getting away."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Um, shouldn't we be moving faster?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Um, shouldn't we get after him then?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Then shouldn't we get going?"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Then shouldn't we be moving faster?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Then shouldn't we get our asses moving?"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Then shouldn't we be moving faster?"
Nolan North: "Then shouldn't we be moving faster?"
Pierce: "Uh, that's a good idea."
— "Open Last Crate"
Pierce: "Looks like he isn't that far ahead. Remember, we can't kill him, we have to find out where he's going."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Right boss."
Pierce: "Boss? Shit, I could get used to this."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Don't."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Don't."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Don't."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Yeah, don't."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Don't."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Don't."
Nolan North: "Don't."
— "Begin Car Chase"
Pierce: "So why ain't we singing?"
The Protagonist: "What?"
Pierce: "You know, that's our thing. We turn on the radio and let ourselves go."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Who says we have to sing along on every freakin' drive?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "You expect a sing-a-long every time we're in a car?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "You expect me to sing on every road trip?"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Oh! Pierce, we don't always... ya know... have to do a sing-a-long."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "What, we're supposed to do a sing-a-long every damn time?"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Let's not wear out this sing-a-long thing."
Nolan North: "Pierce, we don't always have to do a sing-a-long."
Pierce: "Oh come on man, we just did two."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Then be thankful for that, and stop distracting me."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "That's all we ever had before. And I'm trying to focus on your mystery man."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Isn't two enough? I mean, shouldn't we concentrate on chasing this guy?"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "That's all we ever had before. Besides, I'm trying not to lose this guy you're so psyched about, remember."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "We've never done more than two. And I'm a little busy here."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Maybe two's all you get. Now can we focus on this guy we're after?"
Nolan North: "That's all we ever had before. Besides, I'm trying not to lose this guy you're so psyched about, remember."
Pierce: "What, can't you tail someone and flex those pipes at the same time?"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "I'm not gonna sing if I can't give it my all."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "And deliver a less than stellar performance?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Don't tell me you'd be satisfied with a half-ass performance?"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "No, not really. You know how seriously I take my performance."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "What, you want me to give a song less than one hundred percent?"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "A duet takes serious concentration. You really want me phoning it in?"
Nolan North: "No, not really. You know how seriously I take my performance."
Pierce: "You have a point."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "So we trail this guy quietly. Deal?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Then allow me to concentrate on the task at hand."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Then let me focus on this guy we're chasing."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Now can I go back to following this mysterious guy you won't tell me anything about?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Now can I focus on this guy you won't tell me nothing about?"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "There'll be other chances, Pierce. For now, we follow your man."
Nolan North: "Now can I go back to following this mysterious guy you won't tell me anything about?"
Pierce: "A'ight. Go right ahead."
— "Car Chase Convo"
The Protagonist: "Looks like he's heading to--"
Pierce: "The airport! That's where's he's at, of course!"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Where who's at?"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Where who's at?"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Where's who at?"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Where's who at?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Where who's at?"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Where who's at?"
Nolan North: "Where who's at?"
Pierce: "Just keep going, we won't let him get away."
— "Near Airport"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Whoa, wait. That looks like Maero."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Wait a minute. I think that's Maero--!"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Hang on now. Is that Maero?"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Hold on, is that Maero?"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Just a fuckin' minute. Is that Maero?!"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Pierce...is that Maero?"
Nolan North: "Hold on, is that Maero?"
Pierce: "Who do you think we've been after? The Brotherhood, the monster trucks, the radioactive material; those were things that had meaning to Maero. Going after them was the only way to flush him out."
— "See Maero Truck"
Maero: "So the Saints wish to play again. This time I'm not going to offer you a deal."
Pierce: "Don't worry, we wouldn't take one."
Maero: "I see you let your lackeys do the talking for you now."
The Protagonist: "Hey Maero, how's Jessica?"
Maero: "I'm going to enjoy killing you both."
— "Maero Truck Fight"
Maero: "Come on, is that the best you can do?"
Maero: "I expected more from you."
Maero: "The Brotherhood will rise from the ashes in this place!"
Maero: "How did the Saints manage to survive so long?"
— "Maero Fight Taunts"
Maero: "The power I have here is incredible!"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Incredibly simulated. The real Maero's dead and you're not even his ghost."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "You're just a program, Maero. In the real world, you're dead."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "It's an illusion, Maero. And so are you. Back in reality, you're dead as a doornail."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Doesn't matter, you're still dead in the real world, Maero."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "So what? You're still dead in the real world."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Don't kid yourself. In reality, Maero's been dead for years."
Nolan North: "Doesn't matter, you're still dead in the real world, Maero."
Maero: "This world is as real as I make it. Here I will be a god!"
The Protagonist - Female 1: "Yeah, good luck with that."
The Protagonist - Female 2: "Eh. Not so much."
The Protagonist - Female 3: "You never had a very firm grasp on reality."
The Protagonist - Male 1: "Yeah, for all of the next ten seconds."
The Protagonist - Male 2: "Naw, you'll be dead here, too."
The Protagonist - Male 3: "I'd forgotten what a blowhard you were."
Nolan North: "Yeah, for all of the next ten seconds."
— "Maero Fight Convo"
Pierce: "I always hated that asshole. See, my way works."
The Protagonist - Female 1: "But why didn't we come straight for him and--"
The Protagonist - Female 2: "But this needlessly complicated--"
The Protagonist - Female 3: "Pierce, honey, I don't think really had to--"
The Protagonist - Male 1: "We could of just come right for him or--"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "But did we have to go through all that--"
The Protagonist - Male 3: "Seriously, Pierce? Did we really have to--"
Nolan North: "We could of just come right for him or--"
Pierce: "My. Way. Works."
The Protagonist: "You're right, it did. Nice job, Pierce."
Pierce: "You mean boss."
The Protagonist: "Don't push it."
Pierce: "Right."
— "Maero Dead"
Brute
Brute: "Fa-ther..."
Oleg: "You are no child of mine... just an abomination."
— Oleg grappling with a Brute during Return to Steelport
Burden of Proof
Playa: "I told you."
Tera: "This doesn't make any sense. You handed them a huge story."
Playa: "Ultor handed them money."
Tera: "Couldn't you force Valderamma to do something?"
Playa: "I'll see what I can do but we're gonna need some proof beyond a couple of bodies. You came to me with this whole thing - you got any other ideas?"
Tera: "If they want proof, our best bet is to get our hands on the chemicals while Ultor is moving them."
Playa: "Alright, let's go."
Tera: "There's the chemical truck!"
Playa: "Alright, let's take it!"
Tera: "Alright, get in the back and cover us. Ultor isn't going to like losing a shipment."
Tera: "Let's stash this thing at the airport until we get a hold of Jane."
Playa: "The fuck is that thing?"
Tera: "They sent the Scout Prototype? Huh, wow..."
Playa: ""Scout Prototype"? What the hell are you talkin' about?"
Tera: "It's Eric Gryphon's pet project - he wanted an ATV to scout for prime mining locations."
Playa: "Why does a mining vehicle need a goddamn turret?"
Tera: "Hey, you gotta blast through rock. Makes sense to em..."
Playa: "Where the hell are you people planning on mining?"
Tera: "Trust me, you wouldn't believe me if I told you."
Tera: "We're almost there! Just buy us a little more time."
— Once the truck has stopped
Playa: "Jane, come on, it's a great story."
Jane Valderamma: "I want an interview."
Playa: "What?"
Jane Valderamma: "Corporate greed stories are a dime a dozen, I want something more. A whistleblower endangering their lives for justice... that's how you get ratings."
Playa: "I don't know if she'll go for it."
Jane Valderamma: "Then I'm not running your story."
Playa: "Fine, I'll go talk to her."
Burning Down the House
Onlookers: "Shaun-di! Shaun-di! Shaun-di! Shaun-di!"
Playa: "What's going on..."
Shaundi: "Beer bong."
Playa: "No shit. I mean why are we at a frat party."
Shaundi: "If I can drink free, I'll meet anywhere... my ex called me and said he got some dirt for us."
Playa: "I thought I killed your ex."
Shaundi: "Different ex. Now come on..."
Blake: "'Sup Shaundi..."
Shaundi: "Hey Blake, whatchu got for me?"
Blake: "White Widow."
Shaundi: "I was talkin' 'bout the info you called me about, but pass the piece."
Shaundi: "So what's up?"
Blake: "Earlier today I went to Shivington to find party favors for tonight...while I was buyin' I noticed some Samedi wheelin' in a bunch of chemicals into a building."
Shaundi: "You sure?"
Blake: "I know a drug lab when I see one."
Playa: "I'm gonna blow up some dust labs, you wanna come?"
Shaundi: "Eh, you go have fun, I think I'll stay here..."
Playa: "Suit yourself..."
— "Taps and Tips" cutscene
Playa (Male Voice 1): "Whoops, somone left the air on..."
Playa (Male Voice 2): "Take a deep breath assholes..."
Playa (Male Voice 3): "Hope you guys can hold your breath..."
Playa (Female Voice 1): "Ya know boys, it's rude to stay in your room when there's company..."
Playa (Female Voice 2): "Good plan guys..."
Playa (Female Voice 3): "Oops."
— Playa, after shutting off the ventilation system
Playa (Male Voice 1): "Jesus Christ..."
Playa (Male Voice 2): "Oh that's not good..."
Playa (Male Voice 3): "*speaks Spanish*"
Playa (Female Voice 1): "This wasn't supposed to happen..."
Playa (Female Voice 2): "This is horrible..."
Playa (Female Voice 3): "What have I done..."
— Playa realizes Shivington is alight, as the final lab tech drives away.
Playa (Male Voice 1): "Holy shit!"
Playa (Male Voice 2): "Oh shit!"
Playa (Male Voice 3): "Jesus!"
Playa (Female Voice 1): "Holy fuck!"
Playa (Female Voice 2): "Good god!"
Playa (Female Voice 3): "*speaks Spanish*"
— Playa, after destroying a lab
Playa (Male Voice 1): "You think you can hide in there?"
Playa (Male Voice 2): "You bitches can't hide forever..."
Playa (Male Voice 3): "I'll cut you fuckers outta there..."
Playa (Female Voice 1): "You guys aren't too bright are you..."
Playa (Female Voice 2): "You guys got nowhere to go..."
Playa (Female Voice 3): "That door isn't gonna stop me..."
— Playa, after approaching the locked lab
Playa (Male Voice 1): "That's just fuckin' great."
Playa (Male Voice 2): "You gotta be kiddin' me..."
Playa (Male Voice 3): "This can't be good..."
Playa (Female Voice 1): "Fuck me..."
Playa (Female Voice 2): "This shit ain't funny..."
Playa (Female Voice 3): "Well this day's gotten a lot worse..."
— Playa, after the lights go out
The General: "What are you thinking my friend?"
Mr. Sunshine: "It's beautiful."
The General: "And expensive."
Mr. Sunshine: "More money will come..."
The General: "You had best be right. Between the farm and this fire, we can not afford to have anything go wrong with our next shipment."
Mr. Sunshine: "Don't worry General, the shipment will be safe..."
The General: "These Saints are proving themselves to be quite the nuisance..."
Mr. Sunshine: "Then perhaps it's time we speak to their leader..."
— "Eye of the Beholder" cutscene
Burt Reynolds
The Protagonist: "Burt-fucking-Reynolds?"
Burt Reynolds: "Who else could keep this town running?"
The Protagonist meeting Burt Reynolds[11][12]
Burying Evidence
Lin: "Hey, I think we stopped moving. Are you listening? Are you even alive? Say something!"
Lin: "Ow! I'll take that as a yes. Where the fuck's my lighter..."
Donnie: "What are you doing driving Lin's ride, Mr. Sharp?"
William Sharp: "I'm glad you could make it, Donnie. There's something I want you to see."
Lin: "Stay calm, we're gonna get outta this."
Donnie: "Lin?"
Lin: "Donnie listen to me, I swear to god..."
Donnie: "LIN!"
William Sharp: "Take a deep breath and count to ten, Donnie."
Donnie: "Count to ten? You just shot my girl!"
William Sharp: "Yes, it's tragic."
William Sharp: "Could you give me a hand here?"
Donnie: "Why did... why did you..."
William Sharp: "Lin was working with the Saints. Now would you give me a hand? This car is heavy... Donnie, where are you going?"
William Sharp: "Children."
Lin: "Hey... stay... stay calm. We're gonna get outta this."
Lin: "I... I think I found my lighter."
Lin: "Did you hear that asshole Donnie? He said I was his girl."
Breaking Up Is Hard To Do... full CUTSCENES 0336
— "Breaking Up Is Hard To Do..." cutscene
William Sharp: "I won't let you ruin what I built!"
William Sharp: "This time, I'm making sure you're dead!"
William Sharp: "Why aren't you dying?"
— Sharp attacking
William Sharp: "Fine.. we'll do it your way..."
William Sharp: "If I have to get my hands dirty, so be it..."
William Sharp: "If at first you don't succeed..."
William Sharp: "You should've stayed dead..."
William Sharp: "I won't miss twice..."
— Sharp attacking on foot
William Sharp: "Just keep driving, we gotta make it to Joseph."
William Sharp: "I gotta call Joseph..."
William Sharp: "We have to get out of here!"
— Sharp taking damage
William Sharp: "Stay away from me...."
William Sharp: "You're supposed to be dead!"
William Sharp: "How did you get out of that car?"
William Sharp: "Police!"
William Sharp: "When my nephew gets here, you're dead!"
— Sharp taking damage on foot
William Sharp: "Joseph, this is your uncle, the Saints are about to--"
William Sharp: "Oh yeah, fuck you..."
— Sharp dying
William Sharp: "This isn't over!"
William Sharp: "Where's my nephew?"
William Sharp: "I need to find Joseph..."
— Sharp fleeing
William Sharp: "Joseph, don't worry. It's all taken care of."
William Sharp: "Donnie had so much promise."
— Sharp idle
Canonized
Julius Little: "Every muthafucka here knows what we need to do. Those bitches be ridin' around, thinkin' they own these streets. I don't care what flags they're flyin'... Rollerz, Carnales, Vice Kings... no one's makin' this n​igga scared to walk the Row. We 'bout to lock this shit down... right now."
3rd Street Saints gang member #1: "Alright! Yeah!"
3rd Street Saints gang member #2: "Yeah!"
Johnny Gat: "Fuck yeah!"
Johnny notices Playa
Johnny Gat: "Who the fuck's this guy?"
Julius Little: "Troy and I found him, I was gonna see if he'd ride with us."
Johnny Gat: "Julius, if he wants to run with the Saints he's gotta be canonized."
Troy: "He's right, Julius. Everyone had to do it."
Julius Little: "You ready for this, playa?"
Rallying Cry full CUTSCENES 0012
— "Rallying Cry" cutscene
Julius Little: "You got spirit son, I'll give ya that."
Julius Little: "Oh you wanna play with the big boys, do ya?"
Troy: "You didn't want us involved..."
Troy: "You think that's funny, huh?"
Johnny Gat: "You just started somethin' you can't finish."
Johnny Gat: "Julius, this kid ain't smart but he's got guts."
— Upon attacking a lieutenant
Julius Little: "That's enough!"
Troy: "C'mon, get on your feet. We all went through that."
Johnny Gat: "Blood in, blood out."
Julius Little: "Welcome to the 3rd Street Saints."
Julius Little: "Let's get to business. If we're serious about takin' back the Row, we gotta let those muthafuckas know what time it is. Break it down, and it's all about respect. Get enough of it, they're gonna back off, and we're gonna move right on in. We got some friends in town that could use some help. Give 'em a hand. 'Course, you can always drop any muthafucka flyin the wrong flag. So long as word gets out that the Saints is on the Row, I don't give a damn how you do it. You feel me?"
Blood In, Blood Out full CUTSCENES 0016
— "Blood In, Blood Out" cutscene
Troy: "You earned your colors today."
Dex: "That's some impressive shit; the only other Saint who kicked ass like that was Johnny."
Johnny Gat: "Shit, took me half the time."
Julius Little: "Welcome to the 3rd Street Saints."
Julius Little: "Let's get down to business. If we're serious about takin' back the Row, we gotta let those muthafuckas know what time it is. Now you break it down, and it's all about respect. Get enough of it, they're gonna back off, and we're gonna move right on in. We got some friends in town that could use some help. Give 'em a hand. 'Course, you can always drop any muthafucka flyin the wrong flag. So long as word gets out that the Saints is on the Row, I don't give a damn how you do it. You feel me?"
Welcome to the 3rd Street Saints full CUTSCENES 0000
— "Welcome to the 3rd Street Saints" cutscene
Chop Shop
Miguel: "What homes, never seen a man in a wheelchair before?"
Jen: "Don't mind him, he's just in a bad mood, ain't that right baby?"
Jen kisses Miguel on the cheek.
Miguel: "Hey, you'd be on the rag 24-7 if some berry decided to show you what excessive force was all about. It breaks down like this; my boostin' days are over, the police made sure of that. But that don't mean I don't have an eye for what sells. I got a list tacked up on the wall, you bring me the car, I give you the cash holmes...cool?"
Chop Shop The Wheel Man CUTSCENES 0022
— Miguel[13] and Jen[13] in the The Wheel Man cutscene.
Samson: "Hold on, for a second man..."
Samson finishes wiping a license plate on a car.
Samson: "Perfect...that shit is fucking perfect. Check it out playa..."
Samson gestures for The Protagonist to take a look.
Samson: "Would you believe that four n​iggas got shot in that car? That ride looks like I jacked it right off the lot. My work's in fuckin' demand, son, and with you jackin' some extra cars for me, we could both be makin' some extra cheddar. What you say?"
Chop Shop Supply and Demand CUTSCENES 0130
Samson[13] in Supply and Demand cutscene.
Dennis: "Tell Mr. Wong, don't worry...No, I said don't...Yes...I promise, everything is on time, we got nothing to worry about...Alright Good bye."
Dennis hangs up his phone.
Dennis: "I am so fucked."
Dennis turns to The Protagonist.
Dennis: "Sup man...Got any extra time on your hands? This guy Wong put in a big order and I'm having a shitty time finding the cars he asked for. If I don't deliver I'm as useful to him as a used condom. What do you think? Wanna help me find a few rides?"
Chop Shop Wong Time, Wong Place CUTSCENES 0126
— Dennis in Wong Time, Wong Place cutscene.
Commentaries
Voice: "Hey baby, you looking for a bad time?"
Johnny Gat: "Yeah, no."
Commentary Strip Club Back Door Gat
Voice: "Hey girl, you looking for a bad time?"
Kinzie: "Maybe. I'll get back to you."
Commentary Strip Club Back Door Kinzie
Convoy Decoy
Playa: "Pack it up, we gotta move."
Pierce: "I got 20k on this game!"
Playa kicks the table, knocking the chess pieces over.
Pierce: "Damn--!"
Playa: "Now it's a draw."
Convoy Decoy intro
Playa and Pierce, at the Saints HQ, before Playa interrupts Pierce and Oleg's chess game.
Playa: "With STAG in town, we need to be careful, Pierce."
Playa - Zombie: "Garbled"
Pierce: "Huh? Oh, yeah, totally agree."
Playa: "Our place might be compromised..."
Playa - Zombie: "Roars"
Pierce: "Whatever you say."
Playa: "... And we should get some horses and mount a charge on STAG."
Playa - Zombie: "Groans"
Pierce: "Alright, I'll get on that."
Playa: "Dammit Pierce, I'll be over in a bit."
Playa - Zombie: "Babbles"
Pierce: "Sure, see you soon."
— Pre-mission phone call
Playa: "Pack it up, we gotta move."
Pierce: "I got 20k on this game!"
Playa kicks the table, knocking the chess pieces over.
Pierce: "Damn--!"
Playa: "Now it's a draw."
Pierce: "This isn't over. What's up?"
Playa: "It's not safe here. You guys clear this place out. I'll buy you some time."
— Opening cutscene
Oleg: "Pierce is loading the trucks. I will create a distraction at the park."
Playa - Female 1: "Dividing them up sounds good. I'll find one of the STAG bases and draw 'em away."
Playa - Female 2: "Good. I will be hitting one of the bases. Perhaps we can spread them out."
Playa - Female 3: "We should split up. Make STAG spread themselves thin chasing us."
Playa - Male 1: "Alright, that should spread them out. I'll start some shit at one of those STAG bases."
Playa - Male 2: "OK, I'll hit up the STAG bases and do the same."
Playa - Male 3: "We should spread 'em thin. I'll start at one of the STAG bases."
Playa - Zombie: "Garbled"
— "Mission Start"
Playa - Female 1: "How's all that packing up going, Pierce?"
Playa - Female 2: "Pierce, how is the load up going?"
Playa - Female 3: "Pierce, how's the pack-up going?"
Playa - Male 1: "Pierce, how's the pack-up going?"
Playa - Male 2: "How's the move going?"
Playa - Male 3: "How goes the pack-up?"
Playa - Zombie: "Grumbles"
Pierce: "Slow. We've got a lot of shit."
Playa - Female 1: "Only take what's important."
Playa - Female 2: "You have to hurry. Only take what we need."
Playa - Female 3: "Just take the most important stuff."
Playa - Male 1: "Just take what we need."
Playa - Male 2: "If we don't need it, leave it."
Playa - Male 3: "Well, just bring the essentials."
Playa - Zombie: "Growls"
Pierce: "Whatchu think I'm doin'?"
Playa - Female 1: "The chessboard doesn't count..."
Playa - Female 2: "That does not include the chessboard."
Playa - Female 3: "Not the chessboard, Pierce."
Playa - Male 1: "Pierce. Leave the chess board."
Playa - Male 2: "I think you're wasting time on shit like your action figure collection..."
Playa - Male 3: "Not the chess board."
Playa - Zombie: "Gargles"
Pierce: "Man, that's cold."
— "Drive 1"
Playa - Female 1: "What's the best thing these guys have..."
Playa - Female 2: "There must be something I can use in here."
Playa - Female 3: "Let's see what toys these guys have."
Playa - Male 1: "Let's see what toys these guys have."
Playa - Male 2: "Time to pick a fight..."
Playa - Male 3: "There must be something good here..."
Playa - Zombie: "Roars"
— "Arriving at First"
STAG: "A VTOL has been taken by the Saints."
Playa - Female 1: "Cup holders AND their mobile base locations? This thing has it all!"
Playa - Female 2: "They have homing beacons at all of the bases? That's convenient."
Playa - Female 3: "Jackpot... this has all the mobile base locations!"
Playa - Male 1: "Looks like this thing has all their mobile base locations."
Playa - Male 2: "This thing has all of STAGs bases in the flight computer? Merry Christmas to me..."
Playa - Male 3: "This has all their mobile base locations."
Playa - Zombie: "Sneers"
— "Inside"
Playa - Female 1: "Think I might have pissed them off. You're probably good to move, Pierce."
Playa - Female 2: "You can be leaving any time, Pierce. I have STAG occupied."
Playa - Female 3: "Pierce, you ready to do this?"
Playa - Male 1: "Pierce, get things moving. I've got their attention."
Playa - Male 2: "Time to move Pierce, I'm picking a fight..."
Playa - Male 3: "You can head out, Pierce. I've got STAG occupied."
Playa - Zombie: "Garbled"
Pierce: "We're rolling out in a convoy now. I'll let you know how the streets are looking."
— "Convoy Start"
Playa - Female 1: "This is so fucking cool!"
Playa - Female 2: "I can fly in hover or jet mode? This machine was built for me!"
Playa - Female 3: "This is like straight out of the future..."
Playa - Male 1: "Hover AND a jet mode? It's like a helicopter that doesn't suck."
Playa - Male 2: "I should steal military hardware more often..."
Playa - Male 3: "Oh, it's like a helicopter fucked a jet."
Playa - Zombie: "Roars"
— "Jet Mode"
Cyrus: "I want all units checking in with command."
Cyrus: "Squad leaders, what's your status?"
Cyrus: "Why is that Saint still in the air?"
Cyrus: "Detain anyone seen aiding the Saints."
— "Cyrus Generic Orders"
Playa - Female 1: "Wooo! Jester's dead!"
Playa - Female 2: "*psh* In my country planes do 4G negative dives."
Playa - Female 3: "Wooo, DANGER ZOOOONE!"
Playa - Male 1: "Woooo! Talk to me Goose!"
Playa - Male 2: "Woohoo! I AM DANGEROUS!"
Playa - Male 3: "Let's try spinning. That's a good trick."
Playa - Zombie: "Mumbles"
— "VTOLs Are"
Playa - Female 1: "Shit, falling behind on my killing."
Playa - Female 2: "It is time to take the fight to STAG."
Playa - Female 3: "Time to turn the screw..."
Playa - Male 1: "Time to keep the pressure on..."
Playa - Male 2: "Let's see if I can get their attention..."
Playa - Male 3: "Time to hit 'em where it hurts."
Playa - Zombie: "Babbles"
— "Get to a"
Pierce: "Looks like STAG left a roadblock ahead of us. Without help, we ain't getting by."
Pierce: "Another roadblock. We'll hang back while you take it out."
— "Roadblock"
Pierce: "Almost got stopped by STAG. Hit them harder, boss."
Pierce: "STAG's still keeping the streets hot. You gotta pick it up with them."
— "STAG Attention"
Kia: "Investigate all possible Saint vehicles."
Kia: "Update command with casualty reports."
Kia: "I want eyes on the target at all times."
— "Kia Generic Orders"
Pierce: "Alright, good to go now."
Pierce: "We're moving again."
— "Roadblock Thanks"
Cyrus: "Get our AWACS in the air with full escort."
Playa - Female 1: "More planes, huh? Guessing that isn't a good thing..."
Playa - Female 2: "Bringing in reinforcements already? We will see about that."
Playa - Female 3: "More troops? Aw shit..."
Playa - Male 1: "They're flyin' in more troops? Oh fuck that, better hurry this shit up..."
Playa - Male 2: "AWACS? I don't know what the fuck that means, but it sounds bad..."
Playa - Male 3: "Full escort? Uh-oh..."
Playa - Zombie: "Babbles"
— "Call in Plane"
Kia: "Mobile base tango has been hit! I want our fighters in the air!"
STAG: "Copy that."
— "STAG Convo After Takeoff"
Oleg: "There's too many for me to handle."
Playa - Female 1': "Alright, rescue incoming."
Playa - Female 2: "I am coming now, Oleg. Just hang in there."
Playa - Female 3: "Almost there. Hang on, Oleg."
Playa - Male 1: "I'm en route, just hang on."
Playa - Male 2: "Hang tight Oleg, I'm comin"
Playa - Male 3: "I'm almost there, hold on."
Playa - Zombie: "Gargles"
— "Oleg Help"
Interrogation: "Air convoy delta-delta-one entering Steelport airspace."
Playa - Female 1: "Have to run, Oleg. You got the cleanup?"
Playa - Female 2: "Oleg, are you good now?"
Playa - Female 3: "Oleg? Still breathing?"
Playa - Male 1: "Oleg, you alright down there?"
Playa - Male 2: "You OK big man?"
Playa - Male 3: "Everything alright, Oleg?"
Playa - Zombie: "Snarls"
Oleg: "Yes. Thank you for the help."
— "Air Reinforcement Call"
Playa - Female 1: "So you're already there, right Pierce?"
Playa - Female 2: "Pierce, you need to be hurrying now."
Playa - Female 3: "Pierce, you bettter be close by now..."
Playa - Male 1: "Pierce, tell me you're getting close."
Playa - Male 2: "You there yet, Pierce?"
Playa - Male 3: "Pierce, what the hell's going on?"
Playa - Zombie: "Grumbles"
Pierce: "We're tryin' to keep a low profile here. We can't go speedin' through the streets."
Playa - Female 1: "They've brought in a plane with a big fucking radar dish on it just for you."
Playa - Female 2: "You may have to. STAG has called for an AWACS plane and reinforcements."
Playa - Female 3: "Fuck that! There's an AWACS plane and escorts flying in to find you."
Playa - Male 1: "Well they got an AWACS plane flying in with a lot of escorts."
Playa - Male 2: "Cyrus made it sound like some bad shit was coming your way..."
Playa - Male 3: "Might want to rethink that. AWACS plane flying in and they've got company."
Playa - Zombie: "Roars"
Pierce: "You serious?!"
Playa - Female 1: "So faster would be better. Got it?"
Playa - Female 2: "There is a little time yet. I will try to hold them off, but hurry."
Playa - Female 3: "That sound like something I'd make up?"
Playa - Male 1: "Look, just get there. I'll think of something."
Playa - Male 2: "Yeah a wax plane or some shit. Just keep moving man, I got you."
Playa - Male 3: "Just keep going. I'll figure out something!"
Playa - Zombie: "Garbled"
— "On Way To AWACS"
Playa - Female 1: "How many of your friends have I killed now?"
Playa - Female 2: "Last chance STAG. Surrender or die."
Playa - Female 3: "Not so threatening now, are we?"
Playa - Male 1: "Come on, come and get me."
Playa - Male 2: "That the best you got?!"
Playa - Male 3: "C'mon, hit me!"
Playa - Zombie: "Babbles"
STAG: "Shoot that Saint out of the air already!"
— "Killing Escort Crafts 1"
Pierce: "Move is all done. No worries on our end."
Playa - Female 1: "You really know how to ruin a girl's fun."
Playa - Female 2: "Glad to hear it."
Playa - Female 3: "No worries'? Really?"
Playa - Male 1: "Damn, I was having fun..."
Playa - Male 2: "Right on. See you soon."
Playa - Male 3: "Roger. Over and out."
Playa - Zombie: "Sneers"
— "Pierce End"
Josh: "I'm Joshua Birk. On TV I play Nyte Blayde, an exceptionally good looking but misunderstood vampire who risks life and limb every week to keep the world safe."
Josh: "The men and women of STAG put their lives on the line every day to protect your city against gang violence. Want to be a real world hero? Talk to your STAG recruiter today. I know I have."
Josh: "I know I have."
Kia: "Nyte Blayde's the face of STAG? Why don't you just put someone in a fucking deer suit?"
Monica: "Hearts and minds will win the war, my dear."
Cyrus: "Shock and awe wins wars, Senator. Authorize the Daedalus and this will all be over."
Monica: "Absolutely not."
Cyrus: "That kid's gonna get himself killed."
Monica: "Well you ensure Josh Birk's safety or I'll find someone who can. Understand?"
Cyrus: "Yes, Ma'am."
— End cutscene
Playa - Female 1: "I'll take it from here, Oleg."
Playa - Female 2: "That's the park... now to clear it out a bit."
Playa - Male 1: "I'm here. Let's see if I can clear the way."
Playa - Male 2: "I'm here, I'll clear you a path..."
Playa - Male 3: "I'm here...time to clean things up a little."
Playa - Zombie: "Garbled"
— "Arrive at Park"
STAG: "We're under attack, all pilots to aircraft."
Playa - Female 1: "Bingo!"
Playa - Female 2: "I like how he thinks..."
Playa - Female 3: "Aircraft... now we're talking..."
Playa - Male 1: "Now we're talking..."
Playa - Male 2: "Well, no turning back now..."
Playa - Male 3: "There we go."
Playa - Zombie: "Snarls"
— "Get to VTOL"
STAG: "Beginning download."
Playa - Female 1: "Oh that download is being cancelled..."
Playa - Female 2: "You are just wasting your time."
Playa - Female 3: "You'll never find my guys."
Playa - Male 1: "Like hell you're finding my crew..."
Playa - Male 2: "You ain't findin' shit..."
Playa - Male 3: "I don't know why they even bother..."
Playa - Zombie: "Sneers"
— "Hurry and Kill Plane"
Playa - Female 1: "You guys are trying, right?"
Playa - Female 2: "Did you really think you could stop me?"
Playa - Female 3: "Thought you guys could handle anything."
Playa - Male 1: "Thought you guys were trained for this."
Playa - Male 2: "I can't believe I was worried about these clowns..."
Playa - Male 3: "Aren't you blokes supposed to have like... training?"
Playa - Zombie: "Garbled"
STAG: "Keep them off the main radar!"
— "Killing Escort Crafts 2"
Playa - Female 1: "Guess these aren't indestructible..."
Playa - Female 2: "This machine cannot take much more. I need a new one..."
Playa - Female 3: "I'm gonna need a replacement soon..."
Playa - Male 1: "This thing's almost done. Better get a new one."
Playa - Male 2: "This isn't gonna last much longer..."
Playa - Male 3: "Time for a replacement."
Playa - Zombie: "Mumbles"
Playa - Female 1: "Might want to switch this plane out..."
Playa - Female 2: "This one is unstable. I must be finding a new aircraft."
Playa - Female 3: "Gotta find a new plane..."
Playa - Male 1: "Gotta find a new plane..."
Playa - Male 2: "I need a new plane..."
Playa - Male 3: "This won't last much longer."
Playa - Zombie: "Groans"
— "Need New VTOL"
STAG: "Watch it, that big guy is armed!"
STAG: "He's with the Saints, bring him down!"
— "Oleg is Attacking"
Playa - Female 1: "Wake up, STAG. You're just letting me walk all over you."
Playa - Female 2: "Come on, STAG. No reason to make it this easy for me."
Playa - Male 1: "Hey, STAG... you asleep down there? I thought this would be harder."
Playa - Male 2: "Cyrus, you gotta teach your boys not to leave the keys in the car..."
Playa - Male 3: "Hey, STAG... thought you would at least put up a little fight. Whatsamatter?"
Playa - Zombie: "Moans"
— "STAG Convo to Second Base"
Corporate Meltdown
Playa: "Wait. Explain this one more time."
Eric Gryphon: "I thought I made myself quite clear."
Playa: "No, you did, I just wanna make sure it still sounds crazy the second time around."
Eric Gryphon: "I thought you wanted to hurt Dex. My mistake..."
Playa: "Yeah, hurt Dex – not fight a goddamn army."
Eric Gryphon: "You'll have help."
Playa: "From who? A bunch of Ultor rent-a-cops? They're not shooting their own."
Eric Gryphon: "That's what you're not getting: they're not our own. Dex has been moving waste from the nuke plant that he can sell on the black market, and now he's planning on using the Masako to destroy the evidence. If Ultor finds out what he's doing, Dex is finished."
Playa: "Please, Ultor wouldn't care. I've heard stories about what happens in The Pyramid."
Eric Gryphon: "There's a difference between science and war profiteering. If we were into nuclear weapons, we'd be selling to countries with a real economy, not some nut job that lives in a compound."
Playa: "That's encouraging."
Eric Gryphon: "Dex wants to make his move tonight. Together, we can stop him."
Playa: "I'm in."
Eric Gryphon: "We'll need to thin out the Masako ranks before stopping Dex's shipment."
Playa: "How the fuck are we supposed to do that?"
Eric Gryphon: "I leave the details up to you."
Playa: "Me against the whole army?"
Eric Gryphon: "You won't be alone. The security team at the plant is full of my people."
Playa: "Well, that'll be great for about ten seconds..."
— First phone call
Dex: "You need to give up. It's over. You lost."
Playa: "I'm having a little too much fun."
Dex: "Gryphon's not who you think he is."
Playa: "He ain't you, and that's good enough for me."
— Second phone call
Dex: "I've got you outnumbered."
Playa: "Doesn't seem to be helping..."
Dex: "Julius was right. You never know when to quit."
Playa: "It's one of my many charms."
Dex: "You can't beat me."
Playa: "Talk to me after I fuck up a few hundred more of your guys."
— Third phone call
Playa: "You weren't gonna be needing this radioactive waste, were you?"
Dex: "Do you have any idea what you are doing?"
Playa: "...Because I could just drop it off at your office if you did."
Dex: "This isn't some fucking backwards gang from Stilwater that you're messing with!"
Playa: "...Maybe leave a bouquet of flowers to go with it."
Dex: "You listening to me?"
Playa: "See you soon..."
— Fifth phone call
Dex: "Is everything in order, Katie?"
Katie: "Yes sir, your effects are en route."
Dex: "And my office?"
Katie: "I followed protocol: your machine's been wiped and paper files have been shredded. Are you sure you can't wait a few days? You're going to miss the company picnic."
Dex: "I can't, I'm sorry. This transfer is a big opportunity for me. I need to leave tonight."
Katie: "With respect, sir... you had me call in every favor you had to get an immediate transfer. It doesn't look like this is a step up for you."
Dex: "And what does it look like?"
Katie: "Honestly? Like you're running."
Dex: "You're a smart girl."
Crack Down
Dex: "Oh, hey man, didn't hear you come in. Check this out."
Dex: "The Carnales were the first organized gang in the city. The way Julius tells it, they owned the whole damn town until Benjamin King stepped up against them. Tell ya what though, I ain't worried about their history so much as I am the fact that A: the Lopez brothers are crazy muthafuckas, and B: Victor, their enforcer, survived a dozen VK drive-bys."
Dex: "Sounds pretty bad right? Now add in that the Carnales are backed by the largest drug cartel in the world, and I think you'll understand why we're gonna play this safe instead of pullin' a Johnny. We cut off their income first, then we go for Hector. Sound good?"
Playa nods their head
Dex: "That was a rhetorical question, but thanks for your support."
First Blood full CUTSCENES 0132
— "First Blood" cutscene
Crowd Control
Archibald Nice: "Archibald Nice, damn pleasure to meet ya... siddown, siddown."
The Protagonist: "What's this about?"
Archibald Nice: "What this is about is protection. Physical protection for my clients and financial protection for yourself."
The Protagonist: "What do you me-"
The Protagonist - Male 2: "What do you mean?"
Archibald Nice: "The entertainment industry and gangs go hand in hand...remember when those bikers worked security at Altamont? It worked out then, and this'll work out now. I got a lotta talent that's gettin' ready to walk the red carpet, and I wanna make sure no crazy fans hurt my investment. Let's not put anyone in bodybags here, but roughin' up a couple tweens is fine by me."
Vinnie: "Siddown, Siddown..."
Vinnie: "You look good...different, but good."
The Protagonist: "I been getting that a lot lately."
Vinnie: "We'll it's true...word is you're still runnin' with the Saints."
The Protagonist: "Actually, I'm running the Saints."
Vinnie: "Ah, Really? That's great...hey ya know, I uh, got a promotion myself."
The Protagonist: "Outta the loan sharking business?"
Vinnie: "Yeah, Mike and Dan decided to go be professional poker players, so I figured it was time to do bigger and better things..."
The Protagonist: "Like what?"
Vinnie: "I've moved into films."
The Protagonist: "No shit? Whaddya worked on?"
Vinnie: "Let's see, "Cock of Cthulu" starring D.P. Lovecrack, "Bukkake High School 31" starring Abby Hamherstein, "The Cable Man From Bangalore" starring Anoop "The Indian Hammer" Shekar..."
The Protagonist: "Classics in our own time."
Vinnie: "Ain't that the truth...anyway, I got a couple of flicks openin' up soon, and I'd like for you to run security. Porn fans are...well, porn fans: and I don't want nothin' to happen to my talent, ya know?"
The Protagonist: "I love show biz."
Cyrus Temple
Kinzie: "Cyrus has soldiers everywhere so be alert."
Cyrus: "I should have killed you in Steelport."
Zero Saints Thirty dialogue
Unknown Journalist: "How long will STAG be occupying Steelport?"
Cyrus: "There is no "occupation". We have the full support of Mayor Reynolds."
— Cyrus Temple, during his press conference at the end of "Gang Bang".
Jane Valderamma: "How will STAG impact our daily lives?"
Cyrus: "When we win the war on urban terror, you and your families will be safe again."
— Cyrus Temple during his press conference at the end of "Gang Bang".
Playa: "I want STAG out of my city."
Cyrus: "Not gonna happen. STAG's mission is to eradicate the gangs in Steelport."
— Cyrus and Playa in "STAG Party".
Kia: "Nyte Blayde's the face of STAG? Why don't you just put someone in a fucking deer suit?"
Monica Hughes: "Hearts and minds will win the war, my dear."
Cyrus: "Shock and awe wins wars, Senator. Authorize the Daedalus and this will all be over."
Monica Hughes: "Absolutely not."
Cyrus: "That kid's gonna get himself killed."
Monica Hughes: "Well you ensure Josh Birk's safety or I'll find someone who can. Understand?"
Cyrus: "Yes, Ma'am."
— Cyrus, Kia and Monica Hughes, at the end of "Convoy Decoy".
Kia: "Sir, the commandos are en route. We'll have the whole city locked down in 72 hours."
Cyrus: "Outstanding. Thank you, Kia."
Kia: "Permission to speak freely?"
Kia: "It's about damn time we took off the kid gloves."
Cyrus: "Two little words, Kia. Shock and awe."
— Cyrus and Kia, at the end of "My Name is Cyrus Temple".
Monica Hughes: "Commander, what the hell are you doing?!"
Cyrus: "There have been some... complications, Senator."
Monica Hughes: "Complications?! Don't talk to me about complications--I want results!"
Cyrus: "You want results? Then authorize the use of the Daedalus!"
Monica Hughes: "Even if Congress got onboard, Homeland Security would never allow it! This is out of control. I am coming to Steelport!"
Cyrus: "Zombies and Monica Hughes--? Shit."
— At the end of "Zombie Attack".
Cyrus: "They can give you the key to the goddamn city, but soon as you screw up, we'll be back. And next time, STAG is gonna put you down."
Playa: "I love you too, Cyrus."
— Prior to the mission "Gangstas In Space".
Dancing Queen
Benjamin King: "Hey playa, seems Tanya's found her way into the simulation and is building up her empire."
Playa Male 1: "How's she doing that?"
Playa Male 2: "What's how?"
Playa Male 3: "Building an empire? How?"
Playa Female 1: "What the hell is she doing?"
Playa Female 2: "How is she doing that?"
Playa Female 3: "What is she up to?"
Nolan North: "How's she doing that?"
Benjamin King: "She's corrupting people with some sort of virus that's turning them all into her sex trade workers. Matt's figured out how to stop it, and once that's done we need to end Tanya for good."
Playa Male 1: "I'm in."
Playa Male 2: "Sounds good to me."
Playa Male 3: "End that bitch? Sounds good."
Playa Female 1: "All right. I'm in."
Playa Female 2: "Sounds like a plan."
Playa Female 3: "You know I'm in."
Nolan North: "I'm in."
Ben King: "Matt's been able to trace the infected citizens. I'll take you to the first one."
Playa Female 1: "If they're working for Tanya, I don't expect them to go quietly."
Playa Female 2: "I suppose I should not expect this to be easy."
Playa Female 3: "Guess I should expect a fight if I'm going against one of Tanya's crew."
Playa Male 1: "Working for Tanya I'm guessing they're going to put up a fight."
Playa Male 2: "If they work for Tanya, you know they ain't going down easy."
Playa Male 3: "One of Tanya's, eh? Guess I should expect some trouble."
Nolan North: "Working for Tanya I'm guessing they're going to put up a fight."
Ben King: "No doubt. I'm not sure what exactly the virus has done to them, but I'd be careful."
— Mission Start
Ben King: "Down there. Looks like they're not alone."
Playa Female 1: "Is Matt sure I'm gonna be able to absorb their powers?"
Playa Female 2: "Will this absorption power really work?"
Playa Female 3: "This absorption power's gonna work, right?"
Playa Male 1: "You sure this absorption thing is going to work?"
Playa Male 2: "You positive about this absorption thing?"
Playa Male 3: "This absorption thing. It's not gonna give me a rash or anything, will it?"
Nolan North: "You sure this absorption thing is going to work?"
Ben King: "Only one way to find out, though I'd soften them up before you try it."
Playa Female 1: "Here goes nothing."
Playa Female 2: "Here we are. Set me down."
Playa Female 3: "This is the spot."
Playa Male 1: "All right, drop me off."
Playa Male 2: "All right. Here we are."
Playa Male 3: "Set it down and I'll hop off here."
Nolan North: "All right, drop me off."
— Arrive at first Vice King
Playa Female 1: "I hope I'm not interrupting something."
Playa Female 2: "I hope I'm not late."
Playa Female 3: "So is this party BYOB?"
Playa Male 1: "Sorry to break up the party."
Playa Male 2: "Havin' a party without me?"
Playa Male 3: "You got room for another?"
Nolan North: "Sorry to break up the party."
— Attack first Vice King
Ben King: "Matt said since you're not actually a simulation program, you should be immune to the virus."
Playa Female 1: "You both better hope I am."
Playa Female 2: "I really wish Matt would have tested this first."
Playa Female 3: "I know you meant I WILL MOST DEFINITELY BE IMMUNE."
Playa Male 1: "I don't like the sound of that "should"."
Playa Male 2: "Should?!"
Playa Male 3: "Eh. What's one more virus?"
Nolan North: "I don't like the sound of that "should"."
— After first Vice King Dead
Playa Female 1: "What the hell..."
Playa Female 2: "Oh...my..."
Playa Female 3: "Ooh. Bit of a head rush."
Playa Male 1: "Whoa, head rush."
Playa Male 2: "Whoa. Shit."
Playa Male 3: "Whoa. Little dizzy there."
Nolan North: "Whoa, head rush."
Ben King: "Did it work? How do you feel?"
Playa Female 1: "Am I wearing...what am I wearing?"
Playa Female 2: "I am fine...except for my clothes..."
Playa Female 3: "Fine but...what just happened?"
Playa Male 1: "Fine but... something happened to my clothes."
Playa Male 2: "Am I crazy or did my clothes change?"
Playa Male 3: "I don't remember changing clothes..."
Nolan North: "Fine but... something happened to my clothes."
Matt Miller: "Sorry, forgot to mention that. It's just a temporary change, nothing permanent. Though the absorption seems to have worked perfectly. No sign of the virus left in that person."
Ben King: "Good, let's get to the next one then."
— Absorb first Strip
Ben King: "The next infected person's on the move."
Matt Miller: "We can't let the virus spread. Stop the car however you have to."
Playa Female 1: "Don't you dare run from me!"
Playa Female 2: "Get back here now!"
Playa Female 3: "Get your ass back here this instant!"
Playa Male 1: "Dammit, get your ass back here!"
Playa Male 2: "Don't make me chase you!"
Playa Male 3: "You can't run from me!"
Nolan North: "Dammit, get your ass back here!"
Playa destroys the car
Playa Female 1: "Get your ass out now."
Playa Female 2: "Get out of there now!"
Playa Female 3: "Come here!"
Playa Male 1: "Come out of there."
Playa Male 2: "Get out here!"
Playa Male 3: "Get out of that car!"
Nolan North: "Come out of there."
— Arrive at second Vice King
Playa Female 1: "A furry? Fuck me."
Playa Female 2: "A furry? Seriously?"
Playa Female 3: "Huh... furry."
Playa Male 1: "She made them a furry?"
Playa Male 2: "Uh... that's a... that's a furry."
Playa Male 3: "What'd they do to that poor animal..."
Nolan North: "She made them a furry?"
Ben King: "Tanya always had her own tastes."
Playa Female 1: "She's a level of depravity beyond what I can understand."
Playa Female 2: "Yes. Bad tastes."
Playa Female 3: "I'll admit... I'm curious."
Playa Male 1: "Never pictured that as her thing."
Playa Male 2: "Wonder how often they clean that suit."
Playa Male 3: "Yeah, she's a real special snowflake."
Nolan North: "Never pictured that as her thing."
— After second Vice King Dead
Playa Female 1: "I'm really not liking this."
Playa Female 2: "Second one's done."
Playa Female 3: "*ooo* This feels weird."
Playa Male 1: "All right... got the virus."
Playa Male 2: "All right. Number two's down."
Playa Male 3: "Got the virus. What's next?"
Nolan North: "All right... got the virus."
Matt Miller: "That's an... interesting outfit change."
Playa Female 1: "Well. It's not the worst thing I've ever worn."
Playa Female 2: "It certainly has its own...style."
Playa Female 3: "At the right party, I think this works."
Playa Male 1: "Don't judge me."
Playa Male 2: "You like it. You know it."
Playa Male 3: "Doing it for ya, is it?"
Nolan North: "Don't judge me."
— Absorb second Strip
Ben King: "The last one's by the church."
Playa Female 1: "100% sure that's all, right?"
Playa Female 2: "And you're sure that is all?"
Playa Female 3: "Sure there are no more infected people?"
Playa Male 1: "We sure she hasn't infected more people?"
Playa Male 2: "We sure that's all of them?"
Playa Male 3: "And that'll do it. You're sure?"
Nolan North: "We sure she hasn't infected more people?"
Ben King: "We're sure. If she had, things would be a lot worse off in here."
Playa Female 1: "I know Tanya's a bitch but you really think she can do that much damage?"
Playa Female 2: "So you think Tanya can damage the simulation that severely?"
Playa Female 3: "Is Tanya really that much of a threat?"
Playa Male 1: "You really think she could do that much damage, King?"
Playa Male 2: "C'mon, you really think Tanya's that much of a threat?"
Playa Male 3: "You really think Tanya can hurt the simulation that much?"
Nolan North: "You really think she could do that much damage, King?"
Ben King: "I made the mistake of underestimating her once before and it cost me my crew and almost my life. Now if she's back to finish the job, then I'd say she's probably even more dangerous."
— Head to third Vice King
Ben King: "All right, this is the spot."
Playa Female 1: "A lot of VKs here. Aaaaand a gimp."
Playa Female 2: "Okay, I am here--and they have a gimp..."
Playa Female 3: "Well, seems the Vice Kings have a gimp."
Playa Male 1: "That's a lot of VKs and... hold on, did she really turn that person into a gimp?"
Playa Male 2: "We got a lot of VKs here...and a dude in a gimp costume."
Playa Male 3: "I see the Vice Kings have a bit of a fancy fella with them."
Nolan North: "That's a lot of VKs and... hold on, did she really turn that person into a gimp?"
Matt Miller: "And this woman actually worked for you before, King?"
Ben King: "Can we not focus on that."
Matt Miller: "Sorry."
— Arrive at third Vice King
Ben King: "Do your thing then we can go after Tanya."
Playa Female 1: "Do my thing to the gimp?"
Playa Female 2: "...to the gimp?"
Playa Female 3: "To the gentleman in latex?"
Playa Male 1: "What, to the gimp?"
Playa Male 2: "You mean to the gimp?"
Playa Male 3: "Ugh. I hate touching gimp."
Nolan North: "What, to the gimp?"
— After third Vice King dead
Playa Female 1: "At least I didn't absorb his ball gag."
Playa Female 2: "No ball gag? Hm. Pity."
Playa Female 3: "Just glad I didn't end up with a ball gag."
Playa Male 1: "Well, at least I'm not wearing a ball gag."
Playa Male 2: "Whew. At least there's no ball gag."
Playa Male 3: "No ball gag. I'll consider this a win."
Nolan North: "Well, at least I'm not wearing a ball gag."
— absorb third Strip
Ben King: "I'll meet you at the club. Then we can keep her from doing this to anyone else in the simulation."
Playa Female 1: "What's the play when we get to the club?"
Playa Female 2: "And once we get there?"
Playa Female 3: "And once we get to the club?"
Playa Male 1: "So what's the plan when we get there?"
Playa Male 2: "What's the plan after that?"
Playa Male 3: "And what's the call once we get there?"
Nolan North: "So what's the plan when we get there?"
Ben King: "We find Tanya and I put a bullet in her."
Playa Female 1: "As long as she doesn't disappear on us again, sure."
Playa Female 2: "That sounds fine though she did vanish on us last time."
Playa Female 3: "What's gonna prevent her from disappearing on us again?"
Playa Male 1: "That should do it, though last time she disappeared right in front of us."
Playa Male 2: "Sounds good. As long as she doesn't blink out on us again."
Playa Male 3: "She disappeared on us last time we tried that."
Nolan North: "That should do it, though last time she disappeared right in front of us."
Matt Miller: "Don't worry, I'll be sure to block any attempt she makes at slipping through the code."
Ben King: "See, she's not getting away from me this time."
— Head to Club
Ben King: "I'll park this thing and meet you inside."
Playa Female 1: "I see she's changed the décor a bit."
Playa Female 2: "Well. I see she's spiced the place up some."
Playa Female 3: "Place looks different than I remember. She remodel this?"
Playa Male 1: "Huh, looks like she's spiced this place up a bit."
Playa Male 2: "I see Tanya did some remodeling."
Playa Male 3: "Hm... Tanya may be a stone cold bitch, but she's got a gift for lighting..."
Nolan North: "Huh, looks like she's spiced this place up a bit."
— Arrive At Club
Playa Female 1: "Look at that stage, that lighting, good sound system. Ben, meet me near the backstage door. I have to do something."
Playa Female 2: "This place...has an energy. Hm. Ben, meet me by the backstage door. I...have to do something."
Playa Female 3: "Good lighting, nice crowd. Ben, I'll meet you near the back. There's something I have to do."
Playa Male 1: "Good stage, good lights... Uh, Ben, there's something I need to do. Meet me by the backstage door."
Playa Male 2: "Huh. Good sound system, good lighting... Ben, I have to do something. Meet me by the backstage door."
Playa Male 3: "Three quarter thrust. Rapt audience. Respectable DJ. Ben, meet me by the backstage door..."
Nolan North: "Good stage, good lights... Uh, Ben, there's something I need to do. Meet me by the backstage door."
— See Stage
Ben King: "What's up? Did you find Tanya?"
Playa Female 1: "Tanya? No. Amateur night? YES."
Playa Female 2: "If by "Tanya" you mean "the call of the stage" then yes."
Playa Female 3: "Ben, it's amateur night. It's time for me to shine."
Playa Male 1: "No, I'm signing up for amateur night."
Playa Male 2: "No. But I did find the stage."
Playa Male 3: "More important, Ben. I found my calling."
Nolan North: "No, I'm signing up for amateur night."
Ben King: "We don't have time for this."
Playa Female 1: "There is always time to fulfill a dream."
Playa Female 2: "The call is strong, Ben. I must dance."
Playa Female 3: "You know what? What I don't have time for is your negativity. Today I live the dream."
Playa Male 1: "Ben, there is no time BUT this."
Playa Male 2: "Oh yes we do, Ben. Yes we do."
Playa Male 3: "We don't have time NOT to do this."
Nolan North: "Ben, there is no time BUT this."
— Sign Up
Playa Female 1: "I hope you're ready, Steelport."
Playa Female 2: "Time to shine."
Playa Female 3: "Today is the first day of the rest of my life."
Playa Male 1: "Showtime."
Playa Male 2: "Let's do this."
Playa Male 3: "It's time to make some magic."
Nolan North: "Showtime."
— About To Dance
Ben King: "Hey boss!"
Playa Female 1: "I'm in the zone, Ben!"
Playa Female 2: "I am so in the zone!"
Playa Female 3: "I am in the zone! The zone!"
Playa Male 1: "Not now, King, I'm in the zone."
Playa Male 2: "I'm in the zone, King!"
Playa Male 3: "Not now, Ben. I'm in the zone."
Nolan North: "Not now, King, I'm in the zone."
— King Interrupt
Playa Female 1: "This is for you! You've earned it!"
Playa Female 2: "Yes! Feed me your energy!"
Playa Female 3: "Show me the love, people!"
Playa Male 1: "That's right, let me hear your adulation!"
Playa Male 2: "Lemme hear ya scream!"
Playa Male 3: "This is all for you! Oh yeah!"
Nolan North: "That's right, let me hear your adulation! Let me FEEL your adulation!"
— Dance Ending
Playa Female 1: "No sign of Tanya. Pfft. Her loss."
Playa Female 2: "That was amazing but I did not see Tanya anywhere."
Playa Female 3: "I glimpsed heaven on that stage, Ben, but no sign of Tanya."
Playa Male 1: "I didn't see Tanya in the crowd... Huh, her loss."
Playa Male 2: "Tanya wasn't in the crowd. Her loss."
Playa Male 3: "Didn't see Tanya anywhere. She missed a helluva show."
Nolan North: "I didn't see Tanya in the crowd... her loss."
Ben King: "That's because while you were "in the zone" she took one look at you and ran for the roof."
Playa Female 1: "Dammit."
Playa Female 2: "*sigh* Merde."
Playa Female 3: "Well, shoot."
Playa Male 1: "Damn."
Playa Male 2: "Aw fuck."
Playa Male 3: "Ah shit."
Nolan North: "Damn."
— After Dance
Ben King: "You got nowhere to run, Tanya."
Tanya: "That's where you're wrong, sweetie."
Playa Female 1: "You there, Matt?"
Playa Female 2: "Matthew, are you there?"
Playa Female 3: "Are you there, Matt?"
Playa Male 1: "Matt, you there?"
Playa Male 2: "Hey Matt, you there?"
Playa Male 3: "Matt, you around?"
Nolan North: "Matt, you there?"
Matt Miller: "God I wish I wasn't, but yeah, I'm here."
Playa Female 1: "I made magic on that stage, Matt! Did you see it?"
Playa Female 2: "Did you see that? Did you see THAT?"
Playa Female 3: "How great was I, Matt? Don't hold back."
Playa Male 1: "I was great, right? I mean, I know I was but I wanna hear it from you too."
Playa Male 2: "It was good, right? Like really good? Be honest."
Playa Male 3: "I want to hear it from you, Matt. How amazing was that dance? Honestly."
Nolan North: "I was great, right? I mean, I know I was but I wanna hear it from you too."
Matt Miller: "Right now I'm just trying to figure out whether or not there was some sort of residual effect from absorbing those viruses that caused that sudden burst of... I don't know what to call it."
Playa Female 1: "That wasn't the virus, Matt. That was all me. 100% pure awesome."
Playa Female 2: "It is called pure magic, Matt. PURE. MAGIC."
Playa Female 3: "It's called talent. And that wasn't the virus, Matt. It was my calling."
Playa Male 1: "It's called raw talent, Matt. And that wasn't the virus, that was something I was born to do."
Playa Male 2: "Call it talent, Matt. There's no other name for it."
Playa Male 3: "Call it? It's talent, Matt. There's no word that can capture it."
Nolan North: "It's called raw talent, Matt. And that wasn't the virus, that was something I was born to do."
Matt Miller: "Whatever it is, please don't ever make me watch that again."
Ben King: "Can we focus on killing Tanya before she gets away, already?"
— Begin Tanya Chase
Tanya: "You think you can stop me? When I'm through, this whole city will be mine."
Playa Female 1: "There are two things I'm sure of, Tanya. I just performed the dance of the century, and you're gonna die tonight."
Playa Female 2: "That is not going to happen, Tanya. You see not only did I get to show the world the true magic of dance tonight but now I am going to watch you die."
Playa Female 3: "I don't think so, sweetie. The only thing that could top the magic I did on that stage is watching you die."
Playa Male 1: "Not gonna happen, Tanya. I'm fulfilling two dreams tonight: unleashing the grace within me, and watching you die."
Playa Male 2: "I'm fulfilling two dreams tonight, Tanya. Showing this world what true dance is and watching your body go cold."
Playa Male 3: "Tonight will be remembered for two things: The grace I unleashed on that stage and the bullet Ben's gonna put in your brain."
Nolan North: "Not gonna happen, Tanya. I'm fulfilling two dreams tonight: unleashing the grace within me, and watching you die."
Tanya: "Is that what you call that convulsion on stage?"
Playa Female 1: "You never could recognize true talent."
Playa Female 2: "Don't you dare to insult my God-given grace!"
Playa Female 3: "Sugar, you never could recognize real talent."
Playa Male 1: "DON'T YOU DARE INSULT MY TALENT!"
Playa Male 2: "No, that routine was a little something I call "Electricity in Purple.""
Playa Male 3: "Its formal name is "The Ride of the Wild Stallion.""
Nolan North: "DON'T YOU DARE INSULT MY TALENT!"
Tanya flees
Ben King: "Playa, drive her towards the park if you can, but keep her alive. I wanna deal with her myself."
— First Tanya Fight
Tanya: "I'm gonna kill you, then I'm gonna find that coward King and make him suffer."
Playa Female 1: "Ha! You're the one who's running, Tanya."
Playa Female 2: "If King's a coward, why are you the one running?"
Playa Female 3: "Says the woman who keeps running from the fight."
Playa Male 1: "Hey! You're the one who keeps running."
Playa Male 2: "King's a coward? You're the one who's running!"
Playa Male 3: "Coward? You're the one running, girl."
Nolan North: "You're the one who keeps running."
Tanya: "Well he's the one who ain't here. He just sent you to do his dirty work."
Playa Female 1: "Work? Oh no. This has been my pleasure."
Playa Female 2: "Work? Hunting you has been a pleasure."
Playa Female 3: "This whole thing has been my pleasure."
Playa Male 1: "Believe me, this whole thing was my pleasure."
Playa Male 2: "Trust me, this has been my pleasure."
Playa Male 3: "Dirty work? Funny thing coming from you."
Nolan North: "Believe me, this whole thing was my pleasure."
— Second Tanya Fight
Tanya: "What are you doing?"
Playa Female 1: "Say goodbye, Tanya."
Playa Female 2: "Au revoir, Tanya."
Playa Female 3: "Sweet dreams, Tanya."
Playa Male 1: "Goodbye, Tanya."
Playa Male 2: "Good night, Tanya."
Playa Male 3: "What do you think I'm doing?"
Nolan North: "Goodbye, Tanya."
Tanya: "Aaaaah!"
Playa Female 1: "She's in the park, King."
Playa Female 2: "She is in the park, Benjamin."
Playa Female 3: "Tanya's in the park, King."
Playa Male 1: "King, she's in the park."
Playa Male 2: "Ben, she landed in the park."
Playa Male 3: "You'll find her in the park, Ben."
Nolan North: "King, she's in the park."
Ben King: "Almost there."
Playa Female 1: "Shit. Did I just kill her?"
Playa Female 2: "I think I killed her..."
Playa Female 3: "Shit. I didn't mean to kill her..."
Playa Male 1: "Oh shit, think I killed her..."
Playa Male 2: "Ah shit. Did I kill her?"
Playa Male 3: "I...may have just killed her."
Nolan North: "Shit, think I killed her..."
Tanya: "Killed me? I don't think so sweetie."
— Check Tanya Body
Ben King: "Don't you see, Tanya? It's over."
Tanya: "That's what you think. You shouldn't have fucked with the Vice Kings."
Ben King: "No, Tanya. You never should've fucked with me and MY crew."
Tanya: "You don't have the balls."
Ben King: "You never could die with dignity."
Playa Female 1: "Matt. I want to make sure she's really dead this time."
Playa Female 2: "Matt, is she really dead this time?"
Playa Female 3: "And she's dead for real this time. Right, Matt?"
Playa Male 1: "Matt, she dead this time?"
Playa Male 2: "She's dead now. Right, Matt?"
Playa Male 3: "Is she really dead this time, Matt?"
Nolan North: "Matt, she dead this time?"
Matt Miller: "Yep, there's no sign of her or her virus anywhere left in the simulation."
Ben King: "Good, one less thing to worry about."
Tanya: "You're not stopping my plan!"
Tanya: "Everyone in this city will end up my slave."
Tanya: "That virus was just the beginning."
Tanya: "I'm stronger than any of you!"
Tanya: "Don't even think you two can kill me."
— Tanya Chase Taunts
Playa Female 1: "Whoa!"
Playa Female 2: "Whoa!"
Playa Female 3: "Whoa!"
Playa Male 1: "Whoa!"
Playa Male 2: "Whoa!"
Playa Male 3: "Whoa!"
Nolan North: "Whoa!"
— Blasted Back
Dane Vogel
Shogo Akuji: "Dane, don't worry I'll get the money back..."
Vogel: "You're missing the point Shogo, the money was insured, I'm more concerned about you."
Shogo: "What?"
Vogel: "Ultor and the Ronin have had a very healthy relationship in the past, but lately...well, when I pay protection money I expect some fucking protection."
Shogo: "Watch yourself Vogel."
— Questioning Vogel's leadership abilities during the "Saving Face" cutscene of Road Rage
Vogel: "Mr. Akuji, your son and I negotiated a very reasonable contract...."
Kazuo Akuji: "My son's an idiot Mr. Vogel...if you wish for the Ronin's protection you had best be prepared to offer us something much more substantial."
Vogel: "That's not going to happen."
Kazuo: "Then our business is concluded."
— During the meeting with Kazuo Akuji during the "Changing the Deal" cutscene of Visiting Hours
Playa: "Whaddya want?"
Vogel: "I want to help you."
Playa: "If I need any Ultor Unlimited Sunglasses I'll steal 'em."
Vogel: "So you're familiar with our products?"
— "Ultor Makes a House Call" cutscene during Room Service
Jaime: "Mr. Vogel, there's a Mr. Maero here to see you."
Vogel: "Jaime, I'm trying to downsize here..."
Jaime: "Um...Mr. Vogel...I'm not sure I'm adequately conveying Mr. Maero's size..."
Vogel: "Get him out of here..."
Maero breaks down the door.
Vogel: "Or send him in... Wow... Thanks Jaime."
Vogel: "You must be Mr. Maero..."
Maero: "I've heard about the connections Ultor has...you're gonna get my boys outta jail and help me destroy the Saints."
Vogel: "Your[sic] bargaining posture needs some work."
Maero: "The Saints killed my girlfriend and crippled my best friend."
Vogel: "And that's unfortunate, but Ultor is a business and there's no profit in revenge. Don't worry about the door though, that one's on me."
Maero: "Fine. You want money? In a few days a shipment's coming in-"
Vogel: "Mr. Maero, nebulous shipment or not, I think I made myself quite cl-"
Maero flips Vogel's desk.
Vogel: "Woah!"
Maero grabs Vogel by the throat.
Maero: "Let's try this again..."
Maero dangles Vogel out the window.
Maero: "You're gonna help me destroy the Saints."
Vogel: "And Ultor would love to be of service."
Maero: "Good."
— Vogel meets Maero in the "Business Partners" cutscene after "Retribution"
Jaime: "Mr. Vogel, Mr. Maero is-"
(Maero breaks down the door...again.)
Jaime: "See...you..."
Vogel: "Thanks for the heads up Jaime."
Vogel: "Is there something I can help you with?"
Maero: "They hit my boys when they were on the prison bus."
Vogel: "Between your girlfriend and your gang, I'd say you're a magnet for tragedy Maero."
Maero: "You think this is fuckin' funny?"
Vogel: "No, but I do think it's your problem."
Maero: "My problems are your problems...or do you need some fresh air to remind you."
Vogel: "No, see my problem is that a sideshow freak is messing up my paper work...your problem is that there's a group of security guards with assault rifles pointed at your back."
Maero: "Your security guards look more like a private army."
Vogel: "Call 'em whatever you want, the point is that they have big guns. I'm sorry you couldn't protect your friends, I really am...but Ultor is done doing you favors...come back here again and I'll have you shot on sight."
Maero: "Go fuck yourself Vogel."
Vogel: "I've enjoyed our time together too ...but I think it's time to move on. Gentlemen, could you please show our guest out?"
Vogel: "Oh, and Maero...don't worry your little shipment. Ultor has already appropriated it."
Maero: "What did you say?"
Vogel: "Ultor security has taken control of the boat carrying your goods...it only seemed fair that we get compensated for letting your boys out of jail. You can go now."
Maero: "That boat is never gonna make it to shore."
Vogel: "Goodbye Maero."
— "Fool Me Once..." cutscene after after "Jail Bait"
Playa: "How come you went to the Ronin and not us?"
Vogel: "You were in a coma and we couldn't find Julius...timing is everything."
— "A Father's Love" cutscene during Room Service.
Ultor Board Member: "Finish off the Saints, or being fired is the least of your worries."
Vogel: "Is that all?"
2nd Ultor Board Member: "Take care of this, Dane."
Vogel: "Of course I will."
— The "Cutting Losses" cutscene from Pyramid Scheme
Jaime: "Mr. Vogel, will you be needing a car to take you to the party?"
Jaime: "Sir?"
Dane Vogel: "That's alright Jaime, I think I'm going to skip it this year. Oh and Jaime?"
Jaime: "Yes, sir?"
Dane Vogel: "Please move my things to my new office...and set up a press conference."
Jaime: "You were promoted Mr. Vogel?"
Dane Vogel: "I'm about to be..."
— "Dane's Triumph" cutscene after the mission "Salting the Earth...Again"
De Plane Boss
Screen: "Ultor Pictures LTD. Presents"
Screen: "A Mason Brothers Production"
Screen: "Directed by Scott Phillips"
Screen: "Screenplay by Steve Jaros"
Screen: "In association with 3rd Street Saints Holdings LLC"
Screen: "The Boss"
Screen: "Josh Burk"
Screen: "The Inevitable Rise and Fall of Johnny Gat"
— TV screen on the plane[14]
Phone Call: "Okay, we have the location of the cargo plane prison, but..."
Playa: "Kinzie, I don't want to hear it."
Phone Call: "Look, I'm just saying don't get your hopes up."
Playa - Female 1: "You weren't there, Kinzie..."
Playa - Female 2: "He has to be in there, Kinzie..."
Playa - Female 3: "This isn't about false hope. It's about the heart of the Saints..."
Playa - Male 1: "I know I'm right..."
Playa - Male 2: "I know he's on that plane..."
Playa - Male 3: "Just trust me, it's him in there..."
Nolan North: "I know I'm right..."
— "Pre Mission Phonecall"
Playa: "I'm surprised Zinyak went back to the well and hid this inside a Broken Shillelagh again."
CID: "According to Matt's data, all of the sub-matrices are inside Broken Shillelagh's."
Playa: "That makes no sense."
CID: "Zinyak's big on reuse."
Playa: "I'm coming Johnny."
— De Plane Boss opening cutscene
Playa - Female 1: "Any reason my powers are gone?"
Playa - Female 2: "Kinzie? What happened to my powers?"
Playa - Female 3: "You didn't say anything about not having powers."
Playa - Male 1: "Dammit, where're my powers?"
Playa - Male 2: "Hey I don't feel my powers anymore."
Playa - Male 3: "What is this? Where's my powers?"
Nolan North: "Dammit, where're my powers?"
Kinzie: "Your powers only work in your simulation. You're on your own."
Playa - Female 1: "Well I won't be once I find him."
Playa - Female 2: "Powers or no, I am finding my friend."
Playa - Female 3: "Whatever. I'm still coming for you, Johnny..."
Playa - Male 1: "Fine. Well I'm not letting that stop me. I'm coming Johnny..."
Playa - Male 2: "Still won't keep me from finding Johnny..."
Playa - Male 3: "Fair enough. But I'm coming back with my friend."
Nolan North: "Fine. Well I'm not letting that stop me. I'm coming Johnny..."
— "Mission Start"
Playa - Female 1: "God I hate these assholes."
Playa - Female 2: "These assholes make my skin scrawl."
Playa - Female 3: "Hoped I'd never see these guys again."
Playa - Male 1: "God I hate these Morningstar assholes."
Playa - Male 2: "Morningstars. I hate these assholes."
Playa - Male 3: "I'd like to shoot your damn tailor."
Nolan North: "God I hate these Morningstar assholes."
— "Comment On Morningstar"
Playa - Female 1: "Kinzie, can you unlock this thing?"
Playa - Female 2: "Kinzie, the door is stuck..."
Playa - Female 3: "Kinzie, why won't the door open?!"
Playa - Male 1: "Kinzie, the door won't open..."
Playa - Male 2: "Kinzie, the door's jammed!"
Playa - Male 3: "Kinzie, the door's jammed."
Nolan North: "Kinzie, the door won't open..."
Kinzie: "I don't understand..."
Zinyak: "Oh, is something the matter?"
Playa - Female 1: "Oh, you son of a bitch..."
Playa - Female 2: "Not for long."
Playa - Female 3: "I am so going to kill you..."
Playa - Male 1: "Oh fuck you..."
Playa - Male 2: "Son of a bitch..."
Playa - Male 3: "Bastard..."
Nolan North: "Oh fuck you..."
Zinyak: "Poor Johnny is on the other side of that door... and you can't even muster the courage to open it. He's going to die. Alone. And none of his friends will even get to see the body to bury him."
— "Cannot Open Door"
Shaundi: "Johnny? I let you down? I let us all down. We never should have ran, we should have stayed and fought, but we couldn't because... We couldn't because of me."
Shaundi: "And I know people say that it's not my fault, but if the boss didn't have to protect me, you would be standing here right now. I am so sorry Johnny."
Shaundi: "Aaaaaah!"
Playa: "It wasn't your fault."
Shaundi: "We left him to die."
Playa: "He didn't save our lives so we could feel sorry for ourselves."
Zinyak: "Yes, I hate to interrupt this touching moment."
Zinyak: "But we haven't even gotten to the best part of this plane ride?"
Shaundi: "Oh, fuck me-"
Playa: "I'm coming Shaundi!"
— De Plane Boss mid-mission cutscene
Playa - Female 1: "Kinzie, can you locate Shaundi?"
Playa - Female 2: "Kinzie, where did Shaundi go?"
Playa - Female 3: "Kinzie, did he hurt Shaundi?"
Playa - Male 1: "Kinzie, what happened to Shaundi?"
Playa - Male 2: "Kinzie, is Shaundi okay?"
Playa - Male 3: "Kinzie, where's Shaundi?"
Nolan North: "Kinzie, what happened to Shaundi?"
Kinzie: "I don't know, it's like she's... everywhere."
Playa - Female 1: "I swear, if Zinyak hurt her..."
Playa - Female 2: "She needs help."
Playa - Female 3: "Dammit, help me find her."
Playa - Male 1: "I've gotta find her."
Playa - Male 2: "I have to find her."
Playa - Male 3: "If that alien prick did something to her..."
Nolan North: "I've gotta find her."
Zinyak: "This should be... entertaining."
— "Go After Shaundi"
Playa - Female 1: "Whoa, what is this, Kinzie?"
Playa - Female 2: "Kinzie, what is happening?"
Playa - Female 3: "Whoa, something's really wrong here, Kinzie."
Playa - Male 1: "Whoa, what the fuck's going on Kinzie?"
Playa - Male 2: "Hey, what the fuck is this?"
Playa - Male 3: "Kinzie, I might be in trouble here..."
Nolan North: "Whoa, what the fuck's going on Kinzie?"
Kinzie: "I don't... Boss? Boss, are you there?"
Playa - Female 1: "Kinzie...? Shit..."
Playa - Female 2: "Kinzie...? Kinzie...?"
Playa - Female 3: "Kinzie...? Kinzie, answer me."
Playa - Male 1: "Kinzie...? Great..."
Playa - Male 2: "Kinzie...? Shit..."
Playa - Male 3: "Kinzie...? Great..."
Nolan North: "Kinzie...? Great..."
— "World Stretches"
Playa - Female 1: "I am so over this plane."
Playa - Female 2: "Okay, this is crazy-making..."
Playa - Female 3: "Okay, I'm gonna be sick..."
Playa - Male 1: "Okay, that was different."
Playa - Male 2: "This is getting old fast."
Playa - Male 3: "Oh, this is not good."
Nolan North: "Okay, that was different."
— "Starts Again After Fall"
Playa - Female 1: "Come on..."
Playa - Female 2: "Mon Dieu..."
Playa - Female 3: "Aw, hell..."
Playa - Male 1: "Oh god..."
Playa - Male 2: "Jesus..."
Playa - Male 3: "The fuck...?"
Nolan North: "Oh god..."
— "World Spins"
Playa - Female 1: "Lies. Not one of us thinks this stuff."
Playa - Female 2: "Stop it. No one thinks this about you."
Playa - Female 3: "Where's this crap coming from? No one believes that."
Playa - Male 1: "Nobody thinks these things."
Playa - Male 2: "Bullshit, Shaundi. No one thinks this stuff."
Playa - Male 3: "Shaundi, please. Not one of our crew thinks these things."
Nolan North: "Nobody thinks these things."
Shaundi: "Of course they do. Everyone always carries me through everything."
Playa - Female 1: "C'mon, you always pull your weight. *pauses* Shaundi?"
Playa - Female 2: "Not true, Shaundi. *pauses* Shaundi?"
Playa - Female 3: "That ain't so, Shaundi. *pauses* Shaundi?"
Playa - Male 1: "Shaundi, that's not true... Shaundi?"
Playa - Male 2: "Shaundi, please. *pauses* Shaundi?"
Playa - Male 3: "Shaundi, that's rubbish. *pauses* Shaundi?"
Nolan North: "Shaundi, that's not true. *pauses* Shaundi?"
— "Door Voice Player"
Kinzie: "Boss, are you there?"
Playa - Female 1: "Yeah, I'm here."
Playa - Female 2: "Kinzie, thank god."
Playa - Female 3: "Yeah, but I'm sure not enjoying it."
Playa - Male 1: "Yeah, I'm still here."
Playa - Male 2: "Yeah. I'm here."
Playa - Male 3: "Yes, and I think Shaundi's close by."
Nolan North: "Yeah, I'm still here."
Kinzie: "Hold on, why are you in a nightclub? What happened to the plane?"
Playa - Female 1: "Turns out it's not Gat's nightmare, it's Shaundi's. And I think she's here somewhere..."
Playa - Female 2: "This club, the plane -- it's Shaundi's nightmare, not Johnny's."
Playa - Female 3: "It's not Gat's nightmare, it's Shaundi's. She's here somewhere."
Playa - Male 1: "This is Shaundi's nightmare, Kinzie. Trust me, this is where I'm supposed to be."
Playa - Male 2: "Turned out it's Shaundi's nightmare. She's around here somewhere."
Playa - Male 3: "I'll explain soon enough. Just help me find Shaundi."
Nolan North: "This is Shaundi's nightmare, Kinzie. Trust me, this is where I'm supposed to be."
— "Arrive At Club"
Shaundi SR2: "Thanks for the help..."
Playa - Female 1: "Long time no see, Shaundi."
Playa - Female 2: "My pleasure, Shaundi."
Playa - Female 3: "What are friends for, Shaundi?"
Playa - Male 1: "Anytime, Shaundi."
Playa - Male 2: "Good to see you again, Shaundi."
Playa - Male 3: "Been a while, Shaundi."
Nolan North: "Anytime, Shaundi."
Kinzie: "That... is not Shaundi."
Playa - Female 1: "People change, Kinzie. Look closer."
Playa - Female 2: "Trust me, Kinzie, this is her."
Playa - Female 3: "She hasn't worked this look in years, but...yeah. It's her."
Playa - Male 1: "Uh, actually Kinzie, yeah this is."
Playa - Male 2: "Believe it or not, Kinzie, it is."
Playa - Male 3: "This is her, Kinzie. Or it was."
Nolan North: "Actually Kinzie, yeah this is."
Kinzie: "No, something screwed up. Shaundi doesn't act like this... she has like one emotion: pissed."
Shaundi SR2: "This girl needs a bowl fast..."
Playa - Female 1: "Come on, let's get you out of here."
Playa - Female 2: "Let's just get out of here."
Playa - Female 3: "Don't worry, Kinzie. I'll explain when we get back."
Playa - Male 1: "It's fine. Just move on."
Playa - Male 2: "I'll explain later. Let's go, Shaundi."
Playa - Male 3: "Let's go upstairs and sort this out."
Nolan North: "It's fine. Let's move on."
Zinyak: "Not yet my friends, I think Veteran Child deserves a second chance with our fair Jezebel. Maybe several chances..."
— "Shaundi Convo"
Playa: "That's a lot of Veteran Children."
Kinzie: "Veteran Childs. Proper plurals take singular construction."
Playa - Female 1: "Okay, is this -really- the time?"
Playa - Female 2: "Okay, is this -really- the time?"
Playa - Female 3: "Okay, is this -really- the time?"
Playa - Male 1: "Okay, ya'know, is this REALLY the time?"
Playa - Male 2: "Seriously, Kinzie?"
Playa - Male 3: "You're giving me an English lesson?"
Nolan North: "Okay, is this -really- the time?"
— "Shaundi VC Clone Fight"
Playa - Female 1: "Kinzie, a little help here? I shoot one and two pop up--!"
Playa - Female 2: "Why does shooting him make more of him?"
Playa - Female 3: "This isn't right. He just multiplies when I shoot--!"
Playa - Male 1: "Shooting them only seems to make them multiply."
Playa - Male 2: "Shooting them just make MORE of 'em."
Playa - Male 3: "This is no good. I shoot one, two take his place."
Nolan North: "Shooting them only seems to make them multiply."
Kinzie: "Because they aren't being deleted. Here, I'm hacking in a weapon that'll remove each one's code."
— "Kinzie Drops In Gun"
Playa: "You're remarkably calm right now."
Shandi_SR2: "Eh, sometimes your ex's try to kill you, what can ya do, ya know?"
Shandi_SR2: "You wanna party?"
Shaundi: "No, this isn't me..."
Playa: "Shaundi, are you ok?"
Shandi_SR2: "This is getting weird..."
Shaundi: "Get out."
Shandi_SR2: "What's her problem?"
Shaundi: "My problem? My problem is that I used to be you."
Shandi_SR2: "This isn't a born again thing, is it?"
Playa: "No, she's future you."
Shandi_SR2: "Makes sense. So what happens to me?"
Shaundi: "Whaddya mean?"
Playa: "Look, Shaundi let's get out of-"
Shaundi: "No, no, I want to hear what I have to say to myself. What did you mean "What happens to me?""
Shandi_SR2: "Well, evidently I become a total frigid bitch, so I just wanted to know what's up."
Shaundi: "Oh, you mean, "I stopped sitting around smoking drugs from a broken light bulb all day?""
Playa: "Guys, maybe we should-"
Shandi_SR2: "Yeah, you're lame now, you used to have to fun."
Shaundi: "I used to be useless."
Shandi_SR2: "WHAT?"
Shaundi: "The most memorable thing you did was get captured by your smoked out ex."
Shandi_SR2: "That's not true!"
Shaundi: "I'm sorry, and fucking half of Stilwater. Go team."
Playa: "I always thought you were just really friendly and hated pants."
Shandi_SR2: "Someone gets it!"
Shaundi: "I hate me, let's get out of here."
— De Plane Boss closing cutscene
Playa - Female 1: "This is gonna suck..."
Playa - Female 2: "Out of the frying pan, into the fire."
Playa - Female 3: "Not gonna make this easy, are you?"
Playa - Male 1: "This can't be good..."
Playa - Male 2: "Plane was fucked up enough to begin with..."
Playa - Male 3: "From bad to worse..."
Nolan North: "This can't be good..."
— "Begin Nightmare Section"
DJVC: "How're you gonna stop me now?"
DJVC: "You're not leaving me, Shaundi."
DJVC: "Just die!"
— "DJVC Clones Taunting"
Shaundi SR2: "Ah... Little help here!"
Shaundi SR2: "Get this creep away from me!"
Shaundi SR2: "I thought you forgot about me!"
Shaundi SR2: "Just get me outta here!"
Shaundi SR2: "Thank god you're here!"
— "DJVC"
DJVC: "You're not going anywhere."
Shaundi SR2: "Use the stun gun!"
— "DJVC Start Anim"
Shaundi SR2: "What the hell is going on here? Hey, get off me!"
Shaundi: "What the hell is going on here? Hey, get off me!"
Playa - Female 1: "Shaundi...? Where are you?"
Playa - Female 2: "Shaundi? You sound strange."
Playa - Female 3: "Hang on... Shaundi?"
Playa - Male 1: "Wait... Shaundi?"
Playa - Male 2: "Shaundi...that you?"
Playa - Male 3: "Shaundi? You okay?"
Nolan North: "Wait... Shaundi?"
— "Final Plane Door Open"
Johnny Gat: "Attention passangers this is your new captain speaking... our updated flight plan has us landing in Stilwater."
Playa - Female 1: "That's Johnny."
Playa - Female 2: "That's Johnny's voice--!"
Playa - Female 3: "That's him."
Playa - Male 1: "See, I knew Gat was here."
Playa - Male 2: "I knew it. That's Gat."
Playa - Male 3: "I'd know that voice anywhere."
Nolan North: "See, I knew Gat was here."
— "Gat 1st PA"
Johnny Gat: "I'd like to remind all passengers to remain seated and enjoy the flight."
Playa - Female 1: "Hang tough, brother, I'm coming."
Playa - Female 2: "I promise, my friend, I am coming for you."
Playa - Female 3: "We are leaving together, Johnny."
Playa - Male 1: "Don't worry buddy, I'm coming for you."
Playa - Male 2: "I'm not leaving without you."
Playa - Male 3: "Johnny, we're getting you out of here."
Nolan North: "Don't worry buddy, I'm coming."
— "Gat 2nd PA"
Johnny Gat: "I hope you're moving fast, this door isn't gonna hold much longer..."
Playa - Female 1: "Almost there."
Playa - Female 2: "Here I come."
Playa - Female 3: "Not much further."
Playa - Male 1: "Almost there, Johnny."
Playa - Male 2: "I'm close."
Playa - Male 3: "Getting closer, mate."
Nolan North: "Almost there, Johnny."
— "Gat 3rd PA"
Shaundi SR2: "Cut it out!"
Kinzie: "Who's that?"
Playa - Female 1: "That's a voice I haven't heard in ages..."
Playa - Female 2: "I have to get down there."
Playa - Female 3: "I hear her."
Playa - Male 1: "I better get down there."
Playa - Male 2: "Hang on a minute."
Playa - Male 3: "Just a minute, Kinzie..."
Nolan North: "I better get down there."
— "Heading to Dance Floor"
DJVC: "Ahh-aaagh!"
DJVC: "Gaaargh!"
— "Hit With Stun"
Playa - Female 1: "Like hitting "delete"?"
Playa - Female 2: "Good, because ONE of him is one too many..."
Playa - Female 3: "I can't erase them fast enough..."
Playa - Male 1: "Hope this thing works..."
Playa - Male 2: "This thing better work..."
Playa - Male 3: "Here goes nothing."
Nolan North: "Hope this thing works..."
— "Player Picks Up Dis Gun"
Playa - Female 1: "Take your hands off her, Veteran Child."
Playa - Female 2: "Hands off, Veteran Child."
Playa - Female 3: "Back off, Veteran Child."
Playa - Male 1: "Let her go, Veteran Child."
Playa - Male 2: "Step away from her, Veteran Child."
Playa - Male 3: "Hands to yourself, Veteran Child."
Nolan North: "Let her go, Veteran Child."
DJVC: "Yeah, like that's gonna happen."
Kinzie: "Will somebody tell me what's going on here?!"
— "See DJVC and Shaundi"
Playa - Female 1: "Now if I could only delete his smell."
Playa - Female 2: "You know what else? He was a shitty D.J."
Playa - Female 3: "It still stinks like him in here."
Playa - Male 1: "Maybe this time he'll stay dead."
Playa - Male 2: "That's just like him to go up in a puff."
Playa - Male 3: "Good riddance to bad hair."
Nolan North: "Maybe this time he'll stay dead."
— "Shaundi SR2 End"
DJVC: "She's mine, you hear me!"
DJVC: "I'm not letting you take her!"
DJVC: "You can't kill me, I'm triple platinum!"
— "Single DJVC Taunting"
Deckers
Pierce: "What the hell these guys wearin'?"
Protagonist Female 1: "Looks like the Bleak Line by Christoph Valkerie..."
Protagonist Female 2: "A projection of their feelings of abandonment and their resentment of broader society."
Protagonist Female 3: "I dunno, but it kinda turns me on..."
Protagonist Male 1: "Seriously, neo-cyber punk fashion was so 3 years ago."
Protagonist Male 2: "Always thought neo-cyber punk was overrated."
Protagonist Male 3: "No kidding. Don't these chavs know neo-cyber punk was so last decade?"
Protagonist Zombie: "Babbles"
Pierce: "What."
— When Pierce and Playa see The Deckers in Return to Steelport
Defeat Satan
Jane Austen (narrating): "The time had come for the black wedding that would unite Johnny and Jezebel as hell's new power couple."
Jane Austen (narrating): "The tabloids were already calling them "Johnny-bel.""
Jane Austen (narrating): "But Johnny had something different in mind."
Johnny Gat: "Hey, Satan!"
Johnny shoots Satan in the face
Johnny Gat: "You wanna get outta here?"
Jezebel: "I can't believe that worked."
Johnny Gat: "Okham's Razor. So you rea-"
Satan kicks Johnny in the face and throws Jezebel out of the throne room
Satan: "Playtime is over Mr. Gat. Save them if you can."
Johnny Gat: "I love weddings."
— Opening cutscene
Kinzie Kensington: "He's all yours, Johnny."
Johnny Gat: "I got this!"
Satan - Option #1: "You're in my domain, mortal..."
Satan - Option #2: "Your suffering will be legendary, even in hell!"
Satan - Option #3: "Come, then, mortal, and I'll feast on your soul!"
Satan - Option #4: "What hope do you have against the Prince of Lies..."
— Before the fight[15]
Jane Austen (narrating): "And like that, the battle had ended."
Jane Austen (narrating): "Satan could no longer suffer the indignity of being beaten by a mortal and disobeyed by his daughter and so he banished them from perdition."
Jane Austen (narrating): "But still all was not well?"
Back on The Ship
Matt Miller: "That was a direct order from your captain!"
Shaundi: "You're worse than Pierce."
Matt Miller: "Trivia night is sacred, you don't get to quit just because you know fuck-all about pop culture."
Shaundi: "Who knows the name of the NyteBlayde episode where they introduced NyteBlaydette?"
Matt Miller: "It was called "The Meaning of Reconciliation" and it was directed by Kym Steyn!"
Shaundi: "I can't believe Asha sleeps with you."
Matt Miller: "I can't believe you don't."
The Protagonist, Kinzie and Jezebel get kicked out from Hell
Shaundi: "Boss, are you ok?"
The Protagonist: "Yeah, I'm fine..."
Jezebel: "What is this place?"
Matt Miller: "Whoa whoa whoa, who the fuck is that?"
The Protagonist: "Her name's Jezebel, she's The Devil's daughter."
Shaundi: "Pierce is gonna have a heart attack."
The Protagonist: "Eh, she likes to sing, Pierce'll dig her."
Matt Miller: "I don't think that-"
The Protagonist: "Can you rock The Narrator from Joseph?"
Jezebel: "Psh, yeah."
The Protagonist: "She'll be fine."
Kinzie Kensington: "Guys, where's Johnny?"
Jane Austen (narrating): "Our hero had not yet returned to the mortal coil, for he was waylaid by none other than God himself."
God: "I have a situation."
Johnny Gat: "Look man, I really just wanna go home."
God: "I owe you."
Johnny Gat: "What."
God: "Zinyak hastened the apocalypse."
God: "St. Peter's a good guy, bless his heart, but he was processing souls way too slowly."
God: "With the destruction of Earth, Satan had the numbers to storm Heaven..."
God: "All he needed was The President of The United States to lead them."
Johnny Gat: "What, you think I couldn't do it?"
God: "No, I think you wouldn't do it. Aisha's up here."
Johnny Gat: "I wanna see her."
God: "Slow down, buddy. I said that I owe you, and I'll make good on that, but I want you to know your options?"
Jane Austen (narrating): "And now you, dear reader, shape the tale?"
Jane Austen (narrating): "If you want to see Johnny reunited with the love of his life, turn to page 31."
Jane Austen (narrating): "If you want to see The Devil defeated and Johnny crowned the new King of Hell, turn to page 13."
Jane Austen (narrating): "If you want the Saints to find a new home world for what's left of humanity, turn to page 62."
Jane Austen (narrating): "If you want God to recreate the Earth, but in doing so retcon the entire world of It's all about Respect, turn to page 124."
Jane Austen (narrating): "And finally, if you want God to bestow Johnny with answers to all the questions of the universe, turn to page 248."
— Post-fight cutscene
Jane Austen (narrating): "Johnny realized that this was his one chance to make it into Heaven. He had to take it."
Johnny Gat: "Hey Eesh."
Jane Austen (narrating): "The End."
— "Reunite Johnny with the love of his life" ending
Jane Austen (narrating): "In Hell's weakened state, the Heavenly Host made short work of Satan and those who were loyal to him. Soon, Johnny was the new ruler of Hell."
Dane Vogel: "Kinda pretty isn't it."
Johnny Gat: "Yeah... it kind of is."
Dane Vogel: "Do you miss your friends?"
Johnny Gat: "Nah, I know they'll be down here in no time."
Jane Austen (narrating): "The End."
— "Crown Johnny the new King of Hell." ending
Jane Austen (narrating): "As much as he loved Aisha, Johnny couldn't abandon his friends and the rest of humanity..."
Johnny Gat: "There it is."
Kinzie Kensington: "The planet itself looks perfect. Oxygen based, lush forests, clean water, fertile soil..."
Johnny Gat: "What's the catch?"
Kinzie Kensington: "It appears to be inhabited by a psychotic warlike race... this is going to be our toughest fight yet."
Johnny Gat: "Thank you God."
Jane Austen (narrating): "The End."
— "Find the Saints a new home world for what's left of humanity." ending
Jane Austen (narrating): "Johnny knew that he couldn't choose his own happiness at the expense of humanity."
Jane Austen (narrating): "And so he asked God to reshape the world... hoping that maybe. Just maybe. In this new life, he could find his friends again."
Matt Miller: "It's really her."
Kinzie Kensington: "I can't believe we've bagged Brimstone."
Matt Miller: "It doesn't make sense. She's evaded capture for years. Why would she drop the ball now?"
Kinzie Kensington: "I don't know. When the Lt. gets to interrogation, Brimstone's gonna talk."
Jane Austen (narrating): "The End."
— "Have God recreate the Earth and retcon the entire world of Saints Row." ending
Jane Austen (narrating): "There were so many questions that Johnny needed answers to."
Jane Austen (narrating): "Why did good people suffer? Was there a way to bring peace to all mankind?"
Jane Austen (narrating): "What was the secret to making a perfect lobster bisque?"
Johnny Gat: "Ohhhh?"
Jane Austen (narrating): "The End."
— "Have God bestow Johnny with answers to all the questions of the universe." ending
Demolition Derby
Garry: "Are you crazy man? The derby is about to start, if you're just standing around out here you could get really hurt..."
Garry: "Woo!"
Garry's car is knocked out of the way, by his brother.
(Other) Garry: "Don't mind my brother, he's just bein' a pussy. Hop in a car man...there ain't nothin' better than smashing cars for money."
Demo Derby Crash Course CUTSCENES 0371
— The Garry[13] Brothers in the Crash Course cutscene.
Carl: "Don't bother signin' up."
The Protagonist: "Excuse me?"
Carl: "You're thinkin' 'bout signin' up for that there demo derby...and I'm tellin' ya not to bother."
The Protagonist: "Who the fuck do you think you are?"
Carl: "No need to get salty, I'm just tellin' it like it is...I'm gonna win that derby, and there ain't shit you can do about it..."
The Protagonist: "Looks like we'll find out, won't we..."
— "University District Fight Club" Cutscene
Dex
Dex: "Johnny, your idea of a plan is taking the biggest hammer you can find and smashing whatever's in your way."
Johnny Gat: "That sounds like a plan to me."
Dex: "Yeah, a shitty one, as your whack ass robo-leg clearly proves."
Johnny Gat: "Oh, fuck you."
Dex: "Next time you try that cowboy shit, you might not walk away at all."
— Dex and Gat during 3rd Street Vice Kings
Donnie
Joseph Price: "You scared the shit outta me, Donnie."
Donnie: "I scared the shit outta me."
Donnie Escort Service
Joseph Price and Donnie, after the assault on Donnie's garage.[16]
William Sharp: "So your plan is to go steal cars. You really know how to think outside the box, Donnie."
Lin: "Don't talk to him like that."
William Sharp: "I'll take your advice to heart."
Lin: "It's not advice."
William Sharp: "A threat? How refreshing."
— "Thinking Outside the Box" cutscene
Shaundi: "Alright, there's gotta be someone you can pump for information, what about Donnie?"
Playa: "He got manhandled twice. I'm pretty sure he's out of the loop, if not dead."
— "Music Lovers" cutscene
Jane: "Donnie. Thanks for agreeing to this interview. I'm really excited to get an outsider's perspective."
Donnie: "Outsider? What are you talking about? I was like the main character of Saints Row 4."
Jane: "You weren't in Saints Row 4."
Donnie: "What."
Jane: "It's already out. You weren't in it."
Donnie: "Are you serious?"
— Jane informing Donnie he was cut from Saints Row IV.[17]
Lin: "That was supposed to be funny?"
Joseph Price: "I thought it was, until you hit me in the face."
Donnie: "Yeah, then it was hilarious."
Lin, Joseph Price, and Donnie, after Lin smacks Price across the face over a lewd remark.[16]
Joseph Price: "A crew from Saint's Row fucked up our boys."
William Sharp: "Who?"
Donnie: "The same guys who fucked up my shop, I think they're the Fifth Street Alter Boys or somethin'."
— Joseph Price, William Sharp, and Donnie, after the Westside Rollerz' attack on the convoy is prevented.[16]
Joseph Price: "Will you stop smoking that shit? I need you to focus."
Donnie: "If you need me to focus, I'd pass that shit back. (coughs)"
— Joseph Price and Donnie, after Price notices Donnie's lack of focus.[16]
William Sharp: "I know he's your friend, Joseph, but I will not let that nimrod ruin my plans."
Joseph Price: "Your plans?"
William Sharp: "Our plans."
Joseph Price: "Look, Donnie may be a little flaky, but he always steps up at the end."
— Joseph Price assuring his uncle William Sharp over the latter's concerns about Donnie's openness with Lin.[18]
William Sharp: "So your plan is to go steal cars. You really know how to think outside the box, Donnie."
Lin: "Don't talk to him like that."
— Lin and William Sharp, after Donnie divulges his plan to gather more parts.[18]
Joseph Price: "I don't give a shit what you do to Lin, but you better not hurt Donnie."
William Sharp: "Of course, Joseph. I'll keep that in mind."
— Joseph Price and William Sharp, after they conclude that Lin has been selling them out.[18]
William Sharp: "Take a deep breath and count to ten, Donnie."
Donnie: "Count to ten? You just shot my girl!"
William Sharp: "Yes, it's tragic. Could you give me a hand here?"
Donnie: "Why did... why did you..."
William Sharp: "Lin was working with the Saints. Now would you give me a hand? This car is heavy... Donnie, where are you going?"
— William Sharp and Donnie, after Sharp reveals to Donnie Lin's betrayal.[19]
Donnie: "Maero, I'm so sorry..."
Maero: "What did you do, Donnie?"
Donnie: "It's the Saints, they -"
Maero: "What did you do Donnie?"
Donnie: "They made me rig up some of our boys trucks..."
Maero: "And you did it?"
Donnie: "I didn't have a choi-"
Maero: "You had a choice Donnie, you chose your life over the rest of us."
Donnie: "I had a gun to my head man, what was I supposed to do?"
Maero: "Have a spine."
— Donnie and Maero, after Playa drops Donnie off at The Brotherhood's headquarters.[20]
Down Payment
Johnny Gat: "Well, come on in..."
Johnny Gat: "You wanna beer?"
Playa: "Yeah, that'd be great."
Aisha: "Johnny, who's that?"
Johnny Gat: "Come to the living room and find out."
Johnny slams his hand on the lid as the bottle rests on the table, opening it as Aisha comes down.
Aisha: "Johnny, I don't care if you just broke out of jail, you do not mess with my furni- Oh my God, it's you."
Playa: "Surprised Aisha?"
Aisha: "What, that you're here or that you're talking?"
Playa: "Pick one."
Aisha: "We all thought you were dead..."
Playa: "I almost was."
Aisha: "Well, for someone who was blown to hell, you look great...did you do something with your hair?"
Playa: "I've been getting that a lot..."
Johnny Gat: "Can we get back to business?"
Aisha: "What's the rush?"
Johnny Gat: "I've been cooped up on death row, and that bitch's been laid out in a coma..."
Playa: "We definitely need to remind motherfuckers who we are."
Aisha: "And that can't wait until after dinner?"
Playa and Johnny Gat: "No."
Aisha: "You two haven't changed at all."
Johnny Gat: "Well ya know, there's a saying about dogs and blowing shit up... so what's the plan?"
Playa: "We get our crew together, once we got that we can work on how we're takin' back our city."
Johnny Gat: "Sounds good."
Aisha: "And where were you planning on having this little meeting?"
Playa and Johnny Gat look at Aisha, then at each other, then around the house.
Aisha: "No."
Johnny Gat: "Well, this place is pretty spacious..."
Aisha: "No."
Playa: "The color's very soothing..."
Aisha: "No."
Johnny Gat: "Come on Eesh..."
Aisha: "This ain't no fuckin' gang clubhouse..."
Johnny Gat: "Change of plans..."
Playa: "We gotta find a new place?"
Johnny Gat: "Yeah, you got it."
— "You Don't Have To Go Home..." cutscene
Johnny Gat: "Head over to the old mission house, we should be able to set up shop there..."
Playa: "Why don't we just set up shop at the church?"
Johnny Gat: "Ultor's renovated it and turned it into a tourist trap."
Playa: "You're kidding me."
Johnny Gat: "Wish I was, we gotta find a new place and the mission house'll be perfect."
Playa: "Religious buildings are kinda been there done that..."
Johnny Gat: "We're not staying in the mission. Now check it out. Years ago an earthquake dropped part of the city below sea level, and rather than clearing out the rubble, the city built over it. There's an abandoned hotel below the mission that'll work for us."
Playa: "Alright, what's the catch?"
Johnny Gat: "We gotta evict the current tenants..."
Playa: "Sounds like fun..."
— Mission start
Johnny Gat: "So...whatcha think?"
Playa: "It's kind of a shit hole."
Johnny Gat: "True dat... but it's a shit hole with potential."
Playa: "I dunno man..."
Johnny Gat: "Oh come on, a stripper pole, some flat screens...maybe some nicer furniture..."
Playa: "You had me at stripper pole."
Johnny Gat: "Fuckin' A..."
— "Make Yourself At Home" cutscene
Drug Trafficking
Tobias: "YOU THINK YOU CAN STEAL FROM ME?!"
Tobias shoots Billy (Billy's appearance is randomly generated but usually consists of a large black overcoat, a dark hat, sunglasses, and jeans).
Tobias: "YOU THINK YOU CAN FUCKING ROB ME?!"
Tobias shoots Billy again.
Tobias: "YOU STUPID. FUCKING. BACKSTABBING. PIECE OF SHIT!"
Tobias repeatedly shoots Billy. Afterwards, he turns to The Protagonist.
Tobias: "Hey what's up. Sorry 'bout the mess, Billy here thought it would be a good idea to skim off the top...and, well...let's just say he was wrong. Are you lookin' for work? Billy used to watch my back on deliveries, but I don't think he's gonna make it in today. You make sure my deals go smoothly, I cut you in on the action...whaddya say?"
Drug Trafficking Billy's Retirement Party CUTSCENES 0026
Tobias in Billy's Retirement Party cutscene.
The Protagonist walks into a garage full of drugs
Marvin: "Come on in bro, I'm Marvin...I ain't one to bullshit, so I'm gonna lay it all on the table for ya. I got the best goddamn product in Stilwater. Now see that's good, 'cause my buyers need this shit like porn stars need cock, but stealin' junkies away from other dealers has a tendency to create bad feelings' if ya know what I'm sayin'. You cover my ass when I'm slingin', and I'll make sure you see the green."
Drug Trafficking Business Partners CUTSCENES 0030
— Marvin in Business Partners cutscene.
Laura walks out of her house
Laura: "Hello. I'm sorry I'm in a rush, I gotta pick my youngest up from school. Do you have kids? Who am I kidding you probably have something like 5. Oh, nevermind. Anyway, one of my colored friends was talking to me and she was saying that the real money isn't in piano lessons, it's in this thing called koma. She set up some deals with my son's friends but I'm a little nervous about going into the city by myself because, well, I'm not poor. Could you be a dear and help me out? If you do I'll be sure to write you a nice check."
Drug Trafficking Suburban Bliss CUTSCENES 0375
Laura in Suburban Bliss cutscene.
The Protagonist: "Luz? What are you doing here? I thought the Columbians were sending their mule..."
Luz: "They did."
The Protagonist: "You're shitting me."
Luz: "Why are you surprised?"
The Protagonist: "I just never thought I'd see you doing, like, actual work."
Luz: "Believe me, I wouldn't be here if Manuel hadn't cut me off."
The Protagonist: "Yeah, that was a fuckin' shocker..."
Luz: "Can we not talk about it?"
The Protagonist: "He found someone younger didn't he?"
Luz: "Are you gonna help me sell this shit or not?"
The Protagonist: "Well aren't you the big bad drug dealer..."
Luz: "Ya know what, fuck you..."
The Protagonist: "I'm coming, I'm coming...I wouldn't wanna miss this."
— "Hotels & Marina District Drug Trafficking" Cutscene
Richie: "'Sup? My cousin Tobias said that you might be needing some spare cash..."
The Protagonist: "Can you help me out?"
Richie: "Any friend of Toby's a friend of mine... Here's what's goin' down. These over here...are filled with a whole lotta shit that'd never get past customs if ya know what I'm sayin'. These over here...are filled with clothes and hairdryers and shit...we don't worry about pile number two."
The Protagonist: "So what 'chu need me to do?"
Richie: "Same shit you did for my cousin...I make the deals, you make sure no one puts me in jail or in the ground."
— "Airport District Drug Trafficking" Cutscene
Pierce: "Ultor sent over a couple pallets of Saints merch. Maybe we should do a little advertising around town. You know, pimp the Saints in Steelport."
The Protagonist: "Don't we have a PR department for that?"
The Protagonist - Zombie: "Moans"
Pierce: "People go crazy over actual celebrities promoting themselves."
The Protagonist: "So you're saying it has to be me..."
The Protagonist - Zombie: "Snarls"
Pierce: "I'll do the selling, you just get my back. And I have the perfect places to hit..."
— Trafficking intro phone call with Pierce
Zimos: "Hey baby, maybe you can help me out."
The Protagonist: "Baby?"
The Protagonist - Zombie: "Snarls"
Zimos: "I need some help gettin' my trade going, you know? Gettin' the word out."
The Protagonist: "I'm not standing on a corner flicking cards if that's what you're thinking."
The Protagonist - Zombie: "Growls"
Zimos: "I got people to do that for you. Just need help deliverin' the advertisements to them."
The Protagonist: "I mean, I guess..."
The Protagonist - Zombie: "Babbles"
Zimos: "Good, meet me and we can roll these out."
— Trafficking intro phone call with Zimos
Easter Eggs
Playa: "How long were you in jail anyway?"
Johnny Gat: "Two years and 31 days."
— During the mission "Appointed Defender"
Pierce: "Hey, I was thinking: we might die here. Anything you want to get off your chest?"
Playa: "Pierce, don't be so negative..."
Oleg: "He has a point. Were Kinzie here, I'd pour out my heart."
Pierce: "WHAT?"
Oleg: "It's rare I find an intellectual equal."
Playa: "I've read Jane Eyre thirteen times!"
Pierce: "Good to know..."
— During Three Way
Eric Gryphon
Announcer: "This Tuesday, One on One brings you an exclusive in-depth interview with the Ultor's Director of Special Projects, Eric Gryphon."
Interviewer: "Eric, with all that's gone down in the past few years in Stilwater, what are your hopes for the future?"
Eric Gryphon: "The Ultor Corporation spent billions making Stilwater the beautiful city it is today. This was a city riddled with gang warfare and we turned it into a place future generations would be proud to call home. It's my hope to continue that mission."
Interviewer: "But in the midst of all this change, your predecessor was murdered. Is it possible that Ultor is doing more harm than good?"
Eric Gryphon: "Listen, Rome wasn't built in a day. Dane Vogel was a great man, and his presence will be sorely missed, but we have to look towards the future. I think Dane Vogel would be proud to see what Ultor has accomplished since his untimely defenestration."
Interviewer: "How do you respond to claims that Ultor is supporting the gang that tore the city apart?"
Eric Gryphon: "This country was founded on the ideas of second chances - who am I to deny a group of mass-murderers theirs?"
Announcer: "The interview you can't afford to miss. One on One welcomes Eric Gryphon into the studio, Tuesday at nine, only on Channel 6."
Ad one on one gryphon radio misc media 00459
— Eric Gryphon One on One radio commercial
Escort
Jack: "Hey kid, how'd you like to make some quick cash."
Playa approaches Jack's table and reaches for the money Jack had just been counting.
Jack: "Evidently you aren't familiar with the no touching rule...You want the money, you do me a favor. I got a couple of high-profile regulars who want a little more than a lap dance. Now, normally they could go off to the VIP room, bust a nut and be on their way. But these guys have special tastes they'd like to keep, uh, private. Being caught with a hooker is bad enough. Being caught with a fat hooker is even worse. I got a girl waiting in a car out back, all you got to do is pick up the John and give the two of them some privacy. Just make sure no one sees what's going on, alright?"
Escort The No Touching Rule CUTSCENES 0034
— Jack in The No Touching Rule cutscene.
Samantha: "Hey, baby."
Samantha approaches Playa and smiles. Meanwhile a Paparazzi is attempting to photograph her.
Bruno[13]: "No fuckin' cameras!"
Bruno takes the Paparazzi's camera and throws him to the ground.
Paparazzi: "Please, I-I-I thought-"
Bruno: "You thought you'd come here to get a story, but let me tell ya somethin', that ain't gonna happen. Now get the hell out."
Bruno throws the Paparazzi towards the entrance. The Paparazzi gets up and points.
Paparazzi: "You're gonna wish you never did that, when my lawyers get through-"
Playa punches the Paparazzi out.
Bruno: "Nice! Thanks for saving me the trouble. Tell ya what; we could use someone who's got no love for the press. A bunch of big shots like to rent our girls for private parties, and there's nothing the media loves more than a sex scandal. If you can make sure our girls can do their job without the press catching on, we'll pay you some serious cash."
Escort Camera Shy CUTSCENES 0038
— Bruno and Samantha in Camera Shy cutscene.
Jenna: "Hey darlin'. Why don't you have a seat?"
Jenna motions to the seat next to her, and Playa sits down.
Jenna: "I don't mean to pick on ya or anything, but most of the Saints go to places that are a little trashier...why do I got the feelin' you're looking for something other than pink?"
Playa gives a shrug.
Jenna: "I guess you like to keep to yourself...that's good, I like discretion. Celebrities look to me when they're in need of companionship. They've all made their way into my little black book, and the list keeps growing. These are powerful people, and if their hobbies were made public it would ruin their careers, to say nothing of my livelihood. If you're up for it, I need a driver. Simple job; take the girl to the client, then give them enough time in private."
Escort Class Act CUTSCENES 0042
— Jenna in Class Act cutscene.
Sykes: "'Ello mon ami...what can Sykes do for you?"
Playa: "You know what the overhead for runnin' a gang is? I gotta get some money rollin' in."
Sykes: "Charity is not a favorite virtue of Sykes... perhaps though, Sykes can interest you in some work."
Playa: "Keep talking."
Sykes: "Naturally, as Sykes is currently under investigation by the Stilwater PD this is, of course, hypothetical. But IF there was a car out front containing a loose woman...and IF you were to provide an environment where said woman could entertain lustful individuals, all while maintaining their privacy...Sykes MIGHT be able to pay you in cash or in trade."
Playa: "Cash is good."
Sykes: "Looks like we have ourselves a partnership, no?"
Playa: "Partnership nothin', I'm just driving around your hos."
Sykes (unused): "Sykes appreciates your candor."
— "Red Light District Escort" Cutscene
Lindsey: "Thanks for coming...I'm Lindsey"
Playa: "You look a little nerdy to be a pimp."
Lindsey: "I'm not a pimp, I'm a romance manager."
Playa: "So what, no girl will let you turn her out?"
Lindsey: "That's not the point."
Playa: "No girls means no work."
Lindsey: "Look: just 'cause I'm not working a corner like that bloated asshole Helmers doesn't mean that I don't have any girls. I organize all my john's through Meg's List. All I need is a driver to move the girls to the clients."
Playa: "Why don't you do it?"
Lindsey: "Oh, I don't have my license yet..."
Playa: "This is a hell of an operation you're running..."
Lindsey: "Dude, shut up!"
Playa: "Is that any way to talk to an employee?"
Lindsey: "So you'll help?"
Playa: "Are you kiddin' me? I'm dyin' to see what kinda girls you're runnin up in this piece."
— "University District Escort" Cutscene
Escort Service
Joseph Price: "So he's okay? That's great."
William Sharp: "Yes, how could we possibly score dime bags without him?"
Joseph Price: "Oh come on, Uncle Will, he's not that--"
Donnie: "Sup Price?"
Joseph Price: "You scared the shit outta me, Donnie."
Donnie: "I scared the shit outta me."
William Sharp: "Donnie, it's always a pleasure when you bring strangers into my house."
Donnie: "Aw fuck, I forgot, this is--"
Lin: "I'm Lin."
Donnie: "She totally saved my ass Mr. Sharp, she's a helluva driver."
Lin: "I'm the best racer that ever came out of Chinatown."
Joseph Price: "How come I've never heard of you?"
Lin: "Cause I got tits."
Joseph Price: "Is that what you call those?"
Lin punches Price
Joseph Price: "Suppose I deserved that."
Lin: "Yeah, you did."
William Sharp: "My nephew has a...unique sense of humor."
Lin: "That was supposed to be funny?"
Joseph Price: "I thought it was, until you hit me in the face."
Donnie: "Yeah, then it was hilarious."
William Sharp: "Joseph, you better hurry. You don't want to miss your meeting."
Joseph Price: "Sorry, I gotta take off. Lin, it was nice meeting you. I'll catch you later Donnie."
Donnie: "So we're finally hitting that convoy huh?"
William Sharp: "I don't know what you're talking about, Donnie."
Donnie: "Sure you--"
William Sharp: "I don't know what you're talking about, Donnie."
Donnie: "Oh... Riiight. Just sit tight, Price should be back soon."
William Sharp: "As stimulating as this conversation is, I'm afraid I need to make some calls. If you'd excuse me."
Meet Uncle Will full CUTSCENES 0303
— "Meet Uncle Will" cutscene
Donnie: "Ya know what I hate? Underglow. That shit is tacky as hell."
Lin: "Whatever, I think--"
William Sharp: "They all got away?"
Joseph Price: "That's what the word is."
William Sharp: "How did this happen?"
Joseph Price: "A crew from Saint's Row fucked up our boys."
William Sharp: "Who?"
Donnie: "The same guys who fucked up my shop, I think they're the Fifth Street Alter Boys or somethin'."
Lin: "The 3rd Street Saints."
Donnie: "What she said."
Joseph Price: "Will you stop smoking that shit? I need you to focus."
Donnie: "If you need me to focus, I'd pass that shit back. (coughs)"
Joseph Price: "Donnie..."
Donnie: "Alright alright. You got some time before the buyers need those parts right?"
Lin: "The buyers?"
Donnie: "Oh, they're a bunch of guys overseas that Mr. Sharp kn--"
William Sharp: "Donnie, do we have to have another... conversation?"
Donnie: "Sorry."
Joseph Price: "Don't worry 'bout it, just think."
Donnie: "Give me some time. I bet Lin and I can whip somethin' up."
Joseph Price: "Okay, you game for that, Lin?"
Lin: "Hey, anything I can do to help."
Focus full CUTSCENES 0328
— "Focus" cutscene
Eternal Sunshine
Shaundi: "I'm coming too..."
Playa: "No."
Shaundi: "This is total bullshit. You can't just cut me outta the loop."
Playa: "I can do what ever the fuck I want, it's one of the perks of runnin' a gang."
Shaundi: "Is Pierce talkin' shit again, 'cause I don't care wh-"
Playa: "This doesn't have anythin' to do with Pierce: if a strung-out DJ almost took you out, a crazy mutha fucka like Sunshine'll tear you apart. I don't have time to babysit you."
Playa - Male 2: "This doesn't have anythin' to do with Pierce. If a strung out DJ almost took you out, a crazy mutha fucka like Sunshine'll tear you apart. I don't have time to babysit you."
Playa: "This doesn't have anythin' to do with Pierce. If a , a crazy motherfucker like Sunshine'll tear you apart. I don't have time to babysit you."
Shaundi: "You won't have to babysit-"
Playa: "Stick to tactics Shaundi...this conversation is over."
— "Benched" cutscene
Playa - Female 1: "Sweetie, I'm gonna take your head..."
Playa - Female 2: "You're not walking outta here..."
Playa - Female 3: "It ends here sunshine..."
Playa - Male 1: "I ain't scared of a freak like you..."
Playa - Male 2: "I'm gonna enjoy fuckin' you up..."
Playa - Male 3: "*speaks Spanish*"
— Playa responses to Mr. Sunshine
Mr. Sunshine: "This fight...is far from over..."
Mr. Sunshine: "You think that will stop me?"
Playa: "For fuck's sake, die already..."
— "Back For Seconds..." cutscene
F-69 VTOL
Male 1: "Hover AND a jet mode? It's like a helicopter that doesn't suck."
Male 2: "I should steal military hardware more often..."
Male 3: "Oh, it's like a helicopter fucked a jet."
Female 1: "This is so fucking cool!"
Female 2: "I can fly in hover or jet mode? This machine was built for me!"
Female 3: "This is like straight out of the future..."
— Changing flight mode during "Convoy Decoy"
Male 1: "Woooo! Talk to me Goose!"
Male 2: "Woohoo! I AM DANGEROUS!"
Male 3: "Let's try spinning. That's a good trick.[21]"
Female 1: "Wooo! Jester's dead!"
Female 2: "*psh* In my country planes do 4G negative dives."
Female 3: "Wooo, DANGER ZOOOONE!"
— During "Convoy Decoy"
FUZZ
Katie: "Thank you so much for coming in on short notice, you are a life saver."
The Protagonist: "I'm still a little confused why I got a call from a casting director's assistant."
Katie: "Right, so here's the thing, after like 2 years of doing laundry for my boss, he finally allowed me to cast tonight's episode of Fuzz."
The Protagonist: "Still confused..."
Katie: "Right, well, the officer that agreed to let us film them ended up getting sent to the hospital, so I kinda need a last minute replacement. I saw your mugshot on the news and you're a perfect match."
The Protagonist: "So you want me to pretend to be a cop on national TV?"
Katie: "All you have to do is drive around and give us some good footage."
The Protagonist: "Like "good footage" making arrests, or "good footage" knockin' a shirtless guy into a kiddie pool?"
Katie: "Miranda doesn't make for good tv..."
The Protagonist: "Yeah, I can help."
— "Suburbs Expansion District FUZZ" Cutscene
Legal Lee: "Well hello there, you're just the person I was lookin' for..."
The Protagonist: "What's up Lee?"
Legal Lee: "I got a couple of on going cases against the Stilwater PD, and I could use a little leverage."
The Protagonist: "What kinda leverage?"
Legal Lee: "Well I figure if you got yourself on that cop show Fuzz, we could show the world a side of our police force that isn't exactly "prime time friendly"."
The Protagonist: "I don't like the idea of takin' beatings for your clients."
Legal Lee: "Oh, you misunderstand me. I want you dressed as one of Stilwater's finest."
The Protagonist: "And let me guess, there's gonna be a lot of people resisting arrest?"
Legal Lee: "Well what happens in the course of duty is up to you...far be it for me to tell an officer of the law how to beat an unarmed man with a blunt object, or how to discharge your weapon on someone who's trying to surrender."
The Protagonist: "Thanks for not judging how I do my job."
Legal Lee: "Oh, I have nothing but respect for our men in uniform."
— "Projects District FUZZ" Cutscene
Face Your Fear
The Protagonist: "Angel, where are you?"
Angel: "I see you made it through the final test."
The Protagonist: "Answer my question."
Angel: "At the gym, training."
The Protagonist: "Don't move."
The Protagonist: "[Sneers]"
Angel: "I see you made it through the final test."
The Protagonist: "[Growls]"
Angel: "At the gym, training."
The Protagonist: "[Groans]"
The Protagonist: "A fucking tiger?"
Angel: "If you're fighting the Luchadores you need to be ready for anything."